Ben, let me tell u this, if u continue like that, your life will be worse without thinking of anyway to slove the problem.
I used to have a colleague, everyday stoned @ work , keep staring at the monitor for hours but her mind is somewhere else day dreaming. Eveynow and then keep saying why others are so well to do in life but not her. I fuck her left, right, up, down and centre everynow and then, telling her that, even if u want to eat, u MUST move your hand.
My point is, no matter how bad the suitation, like it or not, already happened n must use ur action n try ur best to slove it.