[h=1]HOW CAN WE HELP AMOS YEE PLEASE?[/h]
Post date:
1 May 2015 - 2:19pm
Hello again everyone. I was going to write a blog post about having children but Amos Yee's latest post about his violent and aggressive father gave me a brand new perspective on the issue. I feel very sorry for Amos having suffered much the same as a younger child - thankfully my parents stopped being abusive the moment I grew tall enough to fight back.Whilst I can appreciate that Amos Yee's father must be frustrated by the current state of affairs (ie. losing the S$20,000 bail money when his son broke the conditions of his bail), can there be any excuse for trying to kill your own son by beating him up so savagely? Is Mr Yee insane? Can there be any excuse for the way he treats his own wife? I know there will be Singaporeans who will defend Mr Yee and claims that Amos deserved the beating, but for what it's worth, allow me to stand up and say that Mr Yee should be arrested: the man is a dangerous monster.
Don't get me wrong, I have a good idea of how much Jeremy earns and let's just say he isn't doing too badly financially - but you are going to need a lot more money than most if you are going to bring up six children in London. I know that his current wife doesn't work - she is a housewife taking care of the children. I don't know if his ex-wife is working or if she has remarried. Just how is Jeremy going to be able to afford to buy everything his children need for their education? Do you have to make painful choices as to which child gets to go for that special summer camp and which child doesn't get to go? Are the children going to have the same chances in life as their friends at school, whose parents can afford to spend a lot more money on their education and development? How is Jeremy going to put away any money for his own pension, given that he is already in his 40s? There just isn't enough money for them all.
Jeremy claims that being a father of six children has inspired him to be a better person and he does want to give his children everything they need - that means working very long hours to make sure that he does earn enough to provide for his extended family. Here's the problem though: how much quality time can he actually spend with his children if he is spending so much time working, to make sure he is earning enough money? What kind of relationship would Jeremy have with his children, if they barely get to see him at all because he is working so hard? There are only so many hours in a day left after Jeremy gets back from work - to have to divide those hours between his six children and his wife, how many minutes do each of them realistically get from Jeremy? You do the division - how can Jeremy have any kind of meaningful relationship with any of them with that little time left to spend with each of them?
I believe that if you want to have a child, then that is a commitment you should undertake very seriously and understand what your role as a parent should be. I don't know enough about Jeremy's children so I can't comment any further about his family - but even without anything going drastically wrong, I can see how Jeremy is already potentially letting down his six children and being a bad father by not having enough time for his children. Let's contrast that to the case of Amos Yee, it seems that Amos is an only child yet his parents have totally lost control of him. They seem to have a very destructive, dysfunctional relationship with him where a simple issue like what Amos should wear to court can result in such a wanton display of violence. There is a real sense of desperation in Mr Yee's actions and if he had cultivated a far more meaningful relationship with Amos over the years, then he wouldn't need to resort to beating the crap out of his son to get him to comply: simply using words would suffice - that is what normal people do. Mr Yee, he is your son after all, you need to take responsibility in a sensible manner - not vent your anger on Amos like a crazy, wild animal. If you weren't prepared to be a decent father, then you shouldn't have had a child in the first place.
Here's the thing that scares me about parenting: when your child doesn't quite turn out the way you wanted, what can you do? You can't just give up on your child, can you? Yet what do you do when you have a situation like Amos Yee's - I have no simple answers but I can see that the relationship between Amos and his parents have broken down beyond the point of repair. That is a very sad situation as I can see that Amos Yee has a lot of potential, but that talent has been misspent, misdirected and wasted due to his parents' inability to nurture him properly and channel his energies in an appropriate manner. His very troubled relationship with authority is down to his dysfunctional relationship at home - I can relate to that as I have been through the same process myself years ago.
As for Amos Yee's future, I feel so incredibly sorry for him. At least when Alvin Tan got into so much trouble over the whole Bak Kut Teh saga, he was able to plot his escape from Malaysia and make his way to America because he was a resourceful adult at that point. I wasn't prepared to spend my adult life in Singapore but I was able to leave quietly with no fuss via a scholarship to a British university and then simply staying on afterwards. Many people agree that Amos Yee is probably better off leaving Singapore where he can get away from his parents as well as his haters - he has simply made way too many enemies in Singapore and now many of us fear for his personal safety after he was attacked whilst on his way to court today. It started with many Singaporeans making threats to Amos Yee online and now it has turned into a real assault - needless to say, I don't have any confidence in the authorities in Singapore taking any action against the person who assaulted Amos Yee. Responding with violence when you disagree with what someone wrote - does that sound familiar to you? Can the same thing happen in Singapore? Apparently, yes it can.
But can a 16 year old be expected to do what Alvin Tan did, taking an incredible journey to America via Mexico as a political refugee? Clearly not. Does Amos Yee have a legitimate claim for political asylum? Actually, yes I think so - at this stage, I see the only viable option is for him to leave Singapore and seek asylum abroad before they lock him up and throw away the key or before some crazy Singaporean assaults him again in public like that. Amos Yee needs help and I do hope that there can be a coalition of Singaporeans with common sense who can step forward and save Amos from this kind of crazy vigilante justice (as well as from the toxic environment he has at home). I don't actually believe that Amos should be trying to get himself out of this mess himself and I certainly hope he will listen to the lawyers who are currently representing him pro-bono. I know he certainly won't listen to his parents, but a young man like Amos needs mentors to hold his hand at this stage. His lousy parents have failed him - let's hope he finds someone who is willing to step in and play that role soon, before it is too late.
So that's it from me for now. I do hope Amos Yee gets the support he needs locally and that things will get better for him. He's just a teenage kid after all. Please let me know your thoughts on the issue. Many thanks for reading.
Limpeh FT
*Article first appeared on http://limpehft.blogspot.sg/2015/04/how-can-we-help-amos-yee-please.html
Post date:
1 May 2015 - 2:19pm
Hello again everyone. I was going to write a blog post about having children but Amos Yee's latest post about his violent and aggressive father gave me a brand new perspective on the issue. I feel very sorry for Amos having suffered much the same as a younger child - thankfully my parents stopped being abusive the moment I grew tall enough to fight back.Whilst I can appreciate that Amos Yee's father must be frustrated by the current state of affairs (ie. losing the S$20,000 bail money when his son broke the conditions of his bail), can there be any excuse for trying to kill your own son by beating him up so savagely? Is Mr Yee insane? Can there be any excuse for the way he treats his own wife? I know there will be Singaporeans who will defend Mr Yee and claims that Amos deserved the beating, but for what it's worth, allow me to stand up and say that Mr Yee should be arrested: the man is a dangerous monster.
But allow me to speak about another friend of mine whose situation is far less... volatile. Remember, I spoke about my friend Jeremy in a previous post - that was when I found his religious convictions really disturbing but I chose not to talk about it with him. I found out something else about Jeremy that I found equally disturbing: Jeremy has six children. Three from his previous marriage and three from his current marriage. My first reaction was, how the hell do you bring up six children with the amount of money you earn? (And no, I had the good sense not to say that out aloud.) He was going on and on about how his children are so wonderful and how his youngest son is learning how to walk but all I could think was, six is just too many - how can you be a good father to all six of them?Don't get me wrong, I have a good idea of how much Jeremy earns and let's just say he isn't doing too badly financially - but you are going to need a lot more money than most if you are going to bring up six children in London. I know that his current wife doesn't work - she is a housewife taking care of the children. I don't know if his ex-wife is working or if she has remarried. Just how is Jeremy going to be able to afford to buy everything his children need for their education? Do you have to make painful choices as to which child gets to go for that special summer camp and which child doesn't get to go? Are the children going to have the same chances in life as their friends at school, whose parents can afford to spend a lot more money on their education and development? How is Jeremy going to put away any money for his own pension, given that he is already in his 40s? There just isn't enough money for them all.
I believe that if you want to have a child, then that is a commitment you should undertake very seriously and understand what your role as a parent should be. I don't know enough about Jeremy's children so I can't comment any further about his family - but even without anything going drastically wrong, I can see how Jeremy is already potentially letting down his six children and being a bad father by not having enough time for his children. Let's contrast that to the case of Amos Yee, it seems that Amos is an only child yet his parents have totally lost control of him. They seem to have a very destructive, dysfunctional relationship with him where a simple issue like what Amos should wear to court can result in such a wanton display of violence. There is a real sense of desperation in Mr Yee's actions and if he had cultivated a far more meaningful relationship with Amos over the years, then he wouldn't need to resort to beating the crap out of his son to get him to comply: simply using words would suffice - that is what normal people do. Mr Yee, he is your son after all, you need to take responsibility in a sensible manner - not vent your anger on Amos like a crazy, wild animal. If you weren't prepared to be a decent father, then you shouldn't have had a child in the first place.
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| Amos Yee needs to be protected from his father. |
Here's the thing that scares me about parenting: when your child doesn't quite turn out the way you wanted, what can you do? You can't just give up on your child, can you? Yet what do you do when you have a situation like Amos Yee's - I have no simple answers but I can see that the relationship between Amos and his parents have broken down beyond the point of repair. That is a very sad situation as I can see that Amos Yee has a lot of potential, but that talent has been misspent, misdirected and wasted due to his parents' inability to nurture him properly and channel his energies in an appropriate manner. His very troubled relationship with authority is down to his dysfunctional relationship at home - I can relate to that as I have been through the same process myself years ago.
As for Amos Yee's future, I feel so incredibly sorry for him. At least when Alvin Tan got into so much trouble over the whole Bak Kut Teh saga, he was able to plot his escape from Malaysia and make his way to America because he was a resourceful adult at that point. I wasn't prepared to spend my adult life in Singapore but I was able to leave quietly with no fuss via a scholarship to a British university and then simply staying on afterwards. Many people agree that Amos Yee is probably better off leaving Singapore where he can get away from his parents as well as his haters - he has simply made way too many enemies in Singapore and now many of us fear for his personal safety after he was attacked whilst on his way to court today. It started with many Singaporeans making threats to Amos Yee online and now it has turned into a real assault - needless to say, I don't have any confidence in the authorities in Singapore taking any action against the person who assaulted Amos Yee. Responding with violence when you disagree with what someone wrote - does that sound familiar to you? Can the same thing happen in Singapore? Apparently, yes it can.
So that's it from me for now. I do hope Amos Yee gets the support he needs locally and that things will get better for him. He's just a teenage kid after all. Please let me know your thoughts on the issue. Many thanks for reading.
Limpeh FT
*Article first appeared on http://limpehft.blogspot.sg/2015/04/how-can-we-help-amos-yee-please.html
