PSG keeper Sirigu (in grey): "Let me go! I just want to exchange jerseys! My wife asked me to get their cute pink jersey, otherwise she will not let me f**k her tonight."
Evian keeper Laquait: "Goalkeepers exchange jerseys with goalkeepers. You can exchange with me. Forget about f**king your wife tonight, it is only for one night."
Sirigu: "But you don't understand. The last time I had sex with her was a year ago."
Referee Phil Dowd: "KNN, referees also have to give guard of honour to the champions!!?? If I did not kelong everytime I am in charge of Man U games, Man U will not be champions. I think Man U should give me and my colleagues a guard of honor."
Of course i am angry with suarez for getting the 10 games ban.
After our management meeting, we will not sell him, we will make him
a better person next season. First, we send him for anger managment class,
and after the ban next season, he will wear a dog muzzle for the rest of the
season, while playing.
Veteran Brazil team-mate: "Eh, ah bui, you seem to have put on some weight."
Ronaldo: "Blame it on the bak kwa, the you char kway, the char kway teow, the roast duck and roast suckling pig. Good thing I avoided the orh luak (oyster omelette)."
Ashley Cole: "This new manager Benitez is damn strict. Don't even allow us to go to toilet so I boh pian but to piss on the training pitch. And I've got so much piss!"
Benitez: "Are you sure this 'no toilet break' rule is a good idea?"
Assistant manager Zenden: "Good idea. We have fired the groundsman and save some money. Just make the players piss all over the pitch, not just around the centre circle."