- Joined
- Aug 20, 2022
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Unemployment struggles have left me feeling hopeless
DiscussionJust wanted to get this off my chest. As a Singaporean who is struggling with unemployment and jobhunting for close to a year, I went for so many interviews and it just never got to an offer. I know that rejection happens in life and I am mentally prepared for that, but beyond a certain point it really starts to hurt badly.
For my career, I know parts of it don't align with the typical Singaporean path, study hard to get a decent local degree and end up in some MA programme at some MNC/GLC/ govt job. I left my once-stable Singapore job for an opportunity abroad that I knew would be challenging and risky. I bought into the bullshit narrative about how young people needed to be hungry and take risks.
I felt that taking these risks was the right decision when I was young because I felt this was the moment where I could afford to take these risks and grow no matter how difficult things were. And I did grow alot professionally and personally, even though things were really difficult and I didn't come back with any big success.
But on coming back to Singapore it's been such a tough struggle. I have done so many fucking interviews but not seen any results. Honestly with some interviews they were insinuating that I went abroad because I CMI in Singapore, and seemed to take pleasure in mocking how I came "crawling back home", when many know how it was so difficult to get the opportunity in the first place. It didn't seem to be a nationality thing necessarily, I was getting these attitudes from both native Singaporeans and foreign hiring managers alike.
I even swallowed my pride and tried for entry level jobs, and even if people seemed to like my profile I got rejected for being overqualified. For some jobs because I genuinely liked the role and the people seemed decent, when they asked if I was ok taking entry level pay as an experienced hire, I even said directly I have no issues with your budget and I'm keen to learn these new things at this role, only to not hear back. I'm just so disappointed dealing with this, even if I want to be a bargain cutting my expectations people still won't give me a chance. I know no one owes me a job and in life dealing with rejections is normal and common, but it is almost coming to a point where I feel really worthless.
I reached out to people I knew, I tried going for events to meet new people and told them openly how I was jobhunting, and honestly some were very empathetic and supportive even sending my CV over to their friends, but at the end of the day there were zero interviews from there. All my interviews still only came through direct applications. But it really doesn't mean anything to me if no offer comes through.
I'm just so frustrated, how can it be so hard to just land a normal job? I'm not obsessed with the super high paying jobs just trying to stay somewhere adjacent to my sector.
Time is slipping by and I feel like a complete failure. When I look back, I know staying in Singapore all this time would have made my life so much easier. I would save so much more money towards getting a house, I'd almost certainly be readily employed. Instead I have fallen so far behind on all my peers because of the risks I took. I'm from a normal middle class family with no huge safety net. I should have just been less hungry and more prioritised safety.
The only thing that is keeping me sane for now is starting a gym habit and I am in the best physical shape ever. I have been using this time to play around with AI alot too, which I believe the progress there has been both exciting and frightening especially with the improvements over the past few months.
But increasingly I am feeling very burnt out. I used to be a very optimistic person who was very hopeful. I don't want to hurt the people I love and the people who love me. Nowadays I am beginning to understand why some people give up and eventually go down a very dark path trying to find an end to a very difficult time. I know I am not alone given the current situation but I just really wanted to get this off my chest, and I thought writing about it might help me feel abit better. I don't want pity I want an opportunity. I don't want to give up but I really want to get out of this shitty situation so I can move on with my life.
P.S. just to add a few things
- I didn't expect this to blow up lol I just wrote this on my phone this morning after struggling with very poor sleep coming from the stress. I don't really like spending time just complaining but this time I didn't feel it was healthy bottling up my emotions, and I just had to get the negative energy out of my system. I am quite a private person myself so I actually thought of just leaving this inside my phone, but I know I'm not the only one going through something similar so I wanted to share my POV. I appreciate the kind words and support.
- I have kept some stuff somewhat vague deliberately in my reddit post because I want to keep things professional, and my main point of this post was really just to share abit about what I went through emotionally, and I really hope people respect that instead of digging up or doxxing stuff about some random redditor like myself. I know some of you are well-meaning and want to help, let me know and we can DM each other directly. Singapore is too small and I don't want my authentic side to end up hurting my employability. I wanted to use a throwaway account initially but the account needs some activity.
- For those who have kindly offered to reach out, please feel free to chat with me, or I will look through the comments page and I will reach out accordingly where suitable. Thank you.
