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I'm 39M local Singaporean, single and I'm officially done with dating apps and dating in general
Success story!r/SingaporeR•2 days ago
Dating in SG for a local man is really the most frustrating thing that nobody should put up with and here are the reasons why. I have to say I've been on and off in relationships over the years, started to use the apps 10 years ago and the dating scene is just getting shittier as the years go by:
- Browsing through profiles: The profiles are just a trove of red flags. There's girls writing on their prompts that they love a tattooed guy, men who're emotionally unavailable, local Chinese men don't need to apply, her therapist told her she has mental issues etc. Or their prompts go "You need to do xxx yyy zzz to impress me" "I admit I'm emotionally unavailable" "Treating me like a princess is just the bare minimum, what else do you bring to the table?" Do you really want to swipe right on these? I know most men are desperate af and swipe right on anything but come on have some standards.
- You got a match! Ok so what now? Women mostly won't drop a starter, and even their starters won't lead the conversation anywhere. Most of the time men initiate and so you crack your head and come up with sth light hearted and interesting... Nope, nothing, eerie silence. Ok so some responded. But many have nothing in their profile to talk about. So you go with the safe "How's the day" and you get ghosted. Otherwise you find sth interested in their bio and tease her on it, she gets offended and unmatched you. Or you can even have a conversation going, everything looks to be fine, you drop a joke, she (as always in 2025) gets offended and launch a tirade against you. Or you can be having a great conversation, great to and fros, and you ask if she's free next week, and she goes "Oh I'm so busy with work, busy with meeting my same few friends, busy with TRAVEL (their primary hobby, all of them) so I can only meet you 3 months later"
- Going on a date: Ok so you finally found one seemingly normal woman who shows interest and actually followed through with a date. And the date turns into an interview session. "What do you do for a living?" "Do you drive here?" "Where do you stay? Oh Tiong Bahru.. I see... Condo or HDB?" "Do you invest? Oh which stocks do you buy? When did you start buying it?" What's the point of paying to attend an interview session for a job that isn't even going to pay me (and which I have to pay for to work at)? There's no vibes during dates in 2025 anymore, men always wants to impress and humour but it's women who killed whatever vibes there may be.
- Finally, got tgt with someone. Ok what then? "Oh don't worry he's just my boss who helped me a lot, we're going for a drink, nothing in it" "Yes I'm texting him every waking minute but come on he's just my colleague!". You gotta go through nights where she didn't even respond to your text, you have to wonder the whole night where she's been and who she's with. You go out with her and she's busy texting male colleagues and friends and you wonder why she was never this responsive to your texts. You pay for dates but you just feel like you're dating her shell and she always seems distracted, otherwise she's finding fault and arguing over non issues. You cannot follow other girls on IG, you cannot go out with other women, but there she is DMing influencers on it. When you confront her she'll just say let's "take a break" and we all know that's when she's exploring her options. Then when the break up really came, she goes around victimizing herself to solicit attention from her fellow female friends who tell her she can do better, her ex is toxic, etc and the male orbiters including her boss and colleagues who she claimed are just on professional terms with her.
