Islam Basher Alvin Tan teach you about being a real man

[tonychat]

So here's me addressing the FAQ of all time: why am I dating average-looking girls?

1) I suck
You got me. I'm just not rich or handsome enough yet, maybe never. That's relevant. But still it doesn't explain my insistence on continuing to date what I believe to be girls below my league. I could've just sat it out and waited for the right one to come along, like 99.9% of males out there. Truthfully, these males obviously fear rejection from even "average" girls, which is why they pretend to be selective and have standards. Bitch please... Go and look at your face. True selectiveness means that you're already dating hot women and having to fend off average ones. If you're not at that advanced stage, stop flattering yourself and living in denial. Acknowledge that you don't even have what it takes to get "average" girls instead of insisting that they're "below" your standards.

2) Practice
Getting used to dating girls -- any girl -- helps me massively to get used to interacting with strangers, charming them, getting them into bed, or even attracting them deep enough for a relationship. Because I think I can do better, it doesn't matter if I lose them anyway, so I can experiment and be more reckless; there's less on the line. If a really great-looking girl with an amazing personality comes along, whom I really like, I'm already prepared and not even nervous, because of how much routine practice I've had with the other girls whom I'm not desperate to be with. I wouldn't act like a desperado who's constantly auditioning for the role of a loyal boyfriend with a hot girl. I'd just treat her like the flavor of the week. That sort of nonchalance is incredibly effective in attracting her. Conversely, ask yourself, what do most guys do when they get lucky enough to date a hot girl?

3) Ego boost/validation
Like I said, a guy who doesn't get laid regularly behaves VERY DIFFERENTLY around women compared to a guy who gets laid regularly. Really, any reminder that you have dating options, regardless of the quality of said options, helps to commoditize hot girls in your mind. With options that you're actually using, you won't want to lick the feet of a hot girl and worship the ground she walks on, and that's usually the prerequisite to even getting her interested in the first place. Having average girls who're so proud of taking selfies with you (sense of achievement in being seen in pictures or in public with a guy hotter than themselves) and then bragging to their friends that they've been sucking your dick is a huge confidence booster that most men need to equip themselves with before they're ready for the real hot girls. Remember college girl? She was endlessly Snapchatting me fucking her to her friends. She wasn't really a looker, but that made me feel like a real man. Where else do you find such loyal worshippers to make you feel invincible!?

4) Ultimately, it's about having a good time
I honestly believe that hotness is not a prerequisite to have a great time with a girl, even in bed. For one, in bed, enthusiasm and actually liking me are way more important attributes. Outside the bedroom, I actually need someone I can connect to and who's up to try fun things without too many inhibitions. Too many hot girls have an air around them that they're special. Often times, they're not; they just want every man to worship them for ego purposes, like I'm so free. They're mostly boring too, because they're constantly trying to cash in on their looks instead of improving their personalities. Average girls cannot depend on their looks and really have to develop their character and personality to even attract guys. Would I completely discount an eager-to-please girl who's so much fun to hang out with, just because she doesn't meet some arbitrary beauty standards set by the sexless armchair critics on my Facebook page? You know what I'd be if I did that? Yup, I'll be exactly what you think I'll be: a sexless armchair critic.



i am right again..real man don't pay for sex.

 

[eErotica69]

Spot on jiu hu kia.

Get some real life tips from your fellow jiu hu kia and quit calling black Thai chicken.

 

[tonychat]

Another Gem by Islam and Muslim basher, Alvin Tan, teaches you how not to pay for sex and be a real man.


Here's how to attract women. I've been asked many times to offer my take on how to get women, and, even if you question my credibility based on the girls I get, it doesn't negate or disprove the logic of my points. Here it goes:

1) Work on yourself first and foremost
Frankly, women are one of the last priorities a man should have, if his financial stability, looks, style, confidence, interestingness, charisma, lifestyle, etc. are not in order. Really, you're just making it so much harder on yourself if you aren't going to the gym, eating right, getting trendy haircuts, wearing stylish clothes, accessorizing appropriately, learning how to talk to strangers in general, posture, eye contact, conversational threading, having a successful or at least interesting career, etc. Always work on your fundamentals first; they make up who you are essentially. If who you are essentially sucks, who wants to be near you, much less be your girlfriend or suck your dick?

2) Listen
If you have no fucking idea how to talk to women, just be courteous, ask her about her life or views, and let her talk. She will almost always fill up the silence for you. It's a win-win-win: 1) she gets to unload all those pent-up thoughts for which she has no one to listen to, 2) she mistakes your willingness to listen as "chemistry" (this is huge), and 3) you get to take a break from the enormous pressure of sustaining a conversation. Just ask her questions. Let her speak. Comment sporadically. AFFIRM/VALIDATE HER. Girls don't just want you to say "uh huh" or "okay." They want some form of confirmation that: 1) you're actually taking in information and 2) she's right in what she did, what she thought, what she felt. So just give her that reassurance by agreeing with her, paraphrasing her thoughts, and sometimes even amplifying her stand, e.g. if she's talking about her cheating boyfriend, chime in on how she did the right thing by leaving, and substantiate by saying that you believe trust is the most important thing not just in romantic relationships but also all human relationships.

3) Don't ever acknowledge your weaknesses, that's a quick fix to rock-solid confidence, which is massively attractive
Anything that people see as a weakness of me I simply brush aside. I either rationalize it or pretend that it's not even a shortcoming. I'm a server, I'm fresh off the boat, I'm Asian, I'm short, I live in a shitty apartment in a shitty neighborhood, etc., but do I ever let those things stop me? Hell no. I know those are simply external attributes that mean little in the grand scheme of things. I know, deep down inside, I'm fucking better than everyone else. EVERYONE ELSE. That's arrogant, but arrogance is way superior to low self-esteem.
Let's talk about height. I'm a shorty, yet I've never really seen it as a problem. When I see another tall man, do I go, "Damn, how the fuck am I going to compete with him?" No fucking way... because I know I'm smarter, I'm braver, I have more determination, and I actually know how to listen to women and make them feel loved. I know women say all the time that they date only tall men, but look how quickly those standards fall apart when I show up (ahh... another arrogant claim).

Ivy speaks contemptibly and disparagingly of short men. When I reminded her that I'm short too, she goes, "But you're different! You're have that confidence. You're very alpha." Vivian never ever dated short men (she, too, speaks poorly of short guys), except me, and I'm probably THE most memorable guy she dated. Hell, Kitty today says that she doesn't like Latino men, because they tend to be short. And I went right away, "And I'm tall?" She replied, "Oh, but you're not the same!"
See how women either bullshit about their standards or don't even know what they want?

I've dated and slept with women from below 5' all the way to 5'9". I went out with this girl who was 5'8", and she was rocking heels too, so she easily towered over me. Did it fucking matter? No, because I banged her all the same. We're still friends till today.
What about the whole myth about Asian males having small dicks and being sexless nerds? Who said Latinas and black girls only go for the big black cocks and totally shun Asian dick? Or who said white girls will never pay attention to Asian guys, while Asian girls are white-washed and hate their own pathetic men? Bullshit on all counts. If you behave like the timid Asian guy that people expect you to be, then yeah, you'll be unnoticed and ignored. If you're totally unfazed, and don't let race bother you, you'll get much further.

It's amazing how quickly these things stop mattering once you just show yourself to be a decent human being, which really is fucking rare in today's world. If you throw a pity party for yourself, like how most fat girls complain about being fat or actually show that they're uncomfortable with their own bodies, people can sense that kind of self-deprecation, and they'll avoid you and your negative energy.
How do you rationalize away weaknesses? Well, first, you have to be constantly working on yourself (point 1). Next, focus on your strengths. Always find something to remind yourself that you're better than other people.

Do I get bothered when people make insulting remarks about me being a server? Not at all. First, I probably make more than them and work way less hours, if they're simply earning puny Ringgits. Even if they're earning Singapore dollars, I probably still make more on a per hour basis. Second, if I completed my studies and took the safe boring route, I'd make more money than them with a so-called prestigious office job. Third, I kicked all of their asses back in school. I had perfect score, straight Distinctions, from my UPSR, PMR, O Level exams, all the way to my A Level exams. I have a perfect 2,400 SAT score. They're just insecure idiots at the end of the day; I don't even have to prove anything to these fools. I'm just better.
See how suddenly perceived weaknesses don't even seem to matter anymore when you utilize rationalization as a self-esteem tool? Whenever I meet someone new, I always tell them, shamelessly, as a matter of fact, that

I'm a server. I don't even act like it's a weak point. I also tell them of my acting aspirations. Just play it cool. Why need to beat around the bush or hide it? Given my previous circumstances, I'm lucky to even be a free man today.

To conclude, attracting women is simple. Work on yourself constantly; women are attracted to good things. Next, build chemistry with her; listen to her. Be brave and touch her -- send the message straight that you're no friend material. Then acquire that rare super-confidence that most men will never have a chance of attaining. Women just gravitate to that. I don't know why, but they just do.
If you just work with these basics, you're well on your way to getting the women you want.
P.S. So why am I not getting supermodels just yet? As I've acknowledged before, I'm not rich, handsome, or famous enough. There are just limitations that I'm still consistently working on. Hell, given my circumstances (an average-looking, fresh-off-the-boat asylum seeker without a stable job), I think I'm doing above average already when it comes to dating. I have no reservations giving advice, because I know the logic of it is sound, even without the credibility to back it up.

 

[JohnTan]

Good advice to all sinkies who can't get laid! I hope this would help boost our TFR!

 

[chowcheebye]

Good advice to all sinkies who can't get laid! I hope this would help boost our TFR!

what happ to vivian? she never follow him go USA? can someone also ask him this ques on his FAQ?