“I started having sex when I was in my early 20s. My first sexual partner was a guy I’d been dating for a couple of years and whom I believed I’d end up marrying. When he broke up with me when I was 25, I was devastated. To get over the emotional pain, I became a serial dater.
It didn’t take much for me to go to bed with the men I went out with – if they bought me gifts, complimented me and showed me affection, I was theirs. Between the ages of 25 and 32, I was intimate with more men than I care to remember. Most were one-night stands and the rest were short-term flings.
Numb to love
I hadn’t noticed it at the time but, looking back, I was so hurt from my break-up that I resisted forming emotional connections with the men I dated. I also convinced myself that, if they wanted to be intimate with me, it was because they thought that I was special, lovable and desirable.
A couple of the guys I had flings with actually wanted to take our relationship further, but because I’d put up a wall around my heart, I told them that I wasn’t interested in having anything long-term with them. For seven years, I blocked out any opportunity to, not only find love again but also to make a meaningful connection with someone new. I had sex with random guys to feel good about myself, and I would cut ties before moving on to the next one. I told myself that no man could hurt me if I didn’t give him my heart, and stopped myself from experiencing any deep emotions.
More at https://tinyurI.com/y67dsmfk
It didn’t take much for me to go to bed with the men I went out with – if they bought me gifts, complimented me and showed me affection, I was theirs. Between the ages of 25 and 32, I was intimate with more men than I care to remember. Most were one-night stands and the rest were short-term flings.
Numb to love
I hadn’t noticed it at the time but, looking back, I was so hurt from my break-up that I resisted forming emotional connections with the men I dated. I also convinced myself that, if they wanted to be intimate with me, it was because they thought that I was special, lovable and desirable.
A couple of the guys I had flings with actually wanted to take our relationship further, but because I’d put up a wall around my heart, I told them that I wasn’t interested in having anything long-term with them. For seven years, I blocked out any opportunity to, not only find love again but also to make a meaningful connection with someone new. I had sex with random guys to feel good about myself, and I would cut ties before moving on to the next one. I told myself that no man could hurt me if I didn’t give him my heart, and stopped myself from experiencing any deep emotions.
More at https://tinyurI.com/y67dsmfk
KNN
