Wenger: "My current players play like gu niang (ladies). And my critics keep saying I did not make new signings. So now I presents Arsenal's five new signings. They play better than the gu niangs and, typical of me, do not cost a lot."
Adebayour: "I don't understand why Tottenham don't want me. Everyone has been saying good things about me. Even Jermaine Defoe said I am very handsome."
Defoe: "Oh, please, oh, please! When I open my eyes, I hope Adebayour is gone from here."
DM> So how? tonight mah-jong session on or not?
I want to re-coup my losses last weekend leh.
IH> Is your wife at home, I love her laksa mee and pleanty of hums.
CH> I am no good in mah-jong, can we play chor dai dee instead.
AVB> Nabei, you guys still haven't paid up my winnings last week.
Dawson: eh, eh, look, I think the referee wants to drink your water,
don't give him, it's against the law.
Ref: Nabei, who set the law referee not allowed to drink water during play?
Bopian, lan lan, can only see and lau nuar.
Manuel Pellegrini: Ok. guys, how many games do I need to give Joe Hart
to improve his performance?
one games, you five games, are you sure?
Xabier Mancisidor: No, no, no, I mean five mintues per game.
Lipreading experts have been unable to determine if Catania defender Nicolas Spolli
racially abused Mario Balotelli in Sunday's 3-1 win for the Rossoneri in Sicily.
What was actually spoken:
Spolli: Hey Mario, do you like goreng pisang?
Balotelli: I warn you, don't talk about banana in front of me.
Just before the game with Liverpool.
SMS message from V. Tan:
Didn't you receive my email to resign? why are you still here?
Mackay reply: I'm not that stupid to resign and not getting a cent,
sack me, pay me compensation.