My daughter is 15 months old, and since I gave birth, my libido has been very low. Sex is the last thing on my mind, which frustrates my husband and makes him feel unwanted. He is understanding and very loving, but I do sense his frustration.
Of course, there is intimacy between us and I still feel attracted to him, but caring for our child 24/7 leaves me quite drained, emotionally. I fear that our relationship will be affected and we might get distanced if this carries on for a while.
How you feel is completely normal. While some women feel sexual soon after birth, many don’t for some time. Your body and your life have changed; after giving birth, I remember saying to my partner that the only part of me that felt or looked the same was my toenails.
You didn’t say anything about the birth, but it too may have had an effect on how you feel, physically and psychologically, even if it was “normal”. But I want to stress that even if everything was as good as it could be, not wanting sex when you have a young baby to look after is OK.
I consulted sexual and relationship psychotherapist Jo Coker (cosrt.org.uk), who does a lot of work with postpartum women. “The first thing to do,” she said, “is check that you are physically OK. There are such high expectations of how quickly new parents should click back into normality.”
Coker’s advice – since you are asking for help, not because either of us thinks you should be having sex unless you want to – is to build on the intimacy you have with your partner and “try to get back to seeing each other as sexual beings”.
This doesn’t have to happen overnight. Remember, from an evolutionary point of view, you are biologically programmed to look after your still very young infant (human mammals are born more helpless than any others). Your hormones may not be saying “sex, sex, sex”, either. Again: normal. Be kind to yourself.
How much help and support do you have? Not just to help with the baby, but to help with you? We are social beings and having a baby can be very isolating. Don’t put pressure on yourself – think of yourself first, your sex life second.
More at https://www.theguardian.com/lifeand...was-born-and-fear-this-will-hurt-our-marriage
Only those old timers who drive manual car will fully understand. 
