2 yrs ago, like any noob samsters, I came into this forum and started reading up on spas and MLs. All side good and enjoyable.
I started out tryig different spas mainly HJs. Then explored a few that provides. CBJs and even FJs. For a start, I did not want to go into FJs thinking that I could draw a line to my limits. Then, lust came in and I had my first FJ in one of the spas. All protected. 1 month after the deed I felt guilty and started getting panic over possibility of getting HIV. I went for anonymous testing and cleared of HIV. Decided to stop as I got scared.
Months after that my dark side came back and I started going for HJs again. This time again I limited to HJ at only those with good FRs. Again, lust got better of me and I started looking out websites on MLs and FLs. Without thinking much, I went on to book a ML for a HJ masaage and subsequently a FL, my second protected FJ experience.
This is where things changed. Few days after the deed, my little bro started feeling pain and swollen. Red spots appeared on my shaft and I freaked out. I tot to myself, what if I caught anything nasty from the FL? I went to clinic to consult doc. He advised to wait for window period before doing any test as few days may be too early to test. Gave me some cream to put hoping to clear it off if it's not std.
At that point of time I felt like my life is over. I have a nice family with 2 kids and I could possibly lose all of them and he myself hooked with disease for the rest of my life. My world suddenly felt like crushing down on me. While wait if for test, I have holiday plans with family across Christmas and New Year. How was I suppose to spend it with it telling them??
We went on with the holidays. There I was, secretly monitoring my little bro condition while pretending to enjoy the holidays with kids. It was supposed to be very fun but I don't think I enjoyed about 50% of the time.
Came back from holidays, I rushed to clinic to take urine test that would take week for the result. My little bro felt so swollen and tensed up the back of my scrotum hurt whenever I sat. Red spots disappeared and came back several times. Once, even had a drop of discharge came out and I almost freaked out in the toilet.
And so 1 long week passed. I was cleared of all bacterial STDs.
I had to wait another week to clear 1 month before blood test for viral STDs and HIV. The waiting kills. I suffered from anxiety attacks everyday. I lost around 6kg since the day I started panicking. I kept contacting my doc whenever I felt I saw something different in my condition. All this while he assured me that my condition has little to do with STDs. I tried to rationalise myself and think positively. With anxiety attack happens every now and then.
1 month passed I went down to do my blood test and a sab test on my rashes. My doc spent some time counselling me telling me that he was certain I did not catch anything and was confident of the result. My condition was probably some allergic reaction from the soap I used or the condom.
Another long week passed and blood test results finally out. I was especially feared of catching herpes as it is for life. My doc called to tell me that my blood test was all negative. That point of time when I heard that, I broke down. It was a relief stem from the past one month of stress and anxiety. Pending the result of swab test which he did not think its an issue at all, I was quite cleared frm all STDs and HIV.
Through this episode, i become all appreciative of what i have in life and what I have done. I wasn't ready for all these worries and panics. I wasn't ready to betray my family for the few minutes of enjoyment. I reflected and prayed at temples. I decided that it was just not worth it.
When I ws cleared of my tests, I felt like I was given a 2nd chance to be with my family and kids. I swear to myself I will never step back again.
To some, this may sound like a typical case, and there was really nothing to worry about. To others, this could be a life changing episode that makes you think of what you want in life.
To those who is thinking of booing your first FL/ML experience, think first before you start. It is addictive, it is a risk. You have to be able to handle it.
To all bros who are now enjoying chionging, remember to stay safe, stay healthy.
CNY is coming. Happy New Year!