WP 的 <步步惊心> (Scarlet Hammer)

[skponggol]

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‘大蓝朝’风暴……Tempest All Over ‘Tua Lan Chiow’

講不出聲
“We don’t know what to say in Parliament, leh!” – The Seven Dwarfs of the ‘Tua Lan Chiow’

[video=youtube;LoBoS4oZPs0]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LoBoS4oZPs0&feature=related[/video]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LoBoS4oZPs0&feature=related

谁人无得到一切的渴求…..Which Hammerrhoid zombie didn’t want to be a cadre? None.
谁人无攻于心计的理由…..Which Hammerrhoid zombie didn’t desire to be a Hougang MP? None.
平凡人生 天真过后….......Could a Hammerrhoid zombie remain simple and ordinary without any personal ambition?
要怎么走 ………………………Simply impossible!

如何从委曲中再相信人……After so many leaks to tabloids, how could any Hammerrhoid zombie trust one another?
谁无狂想 不可告人.......Hammerroid zombies dreamed to move up the Party, but told no one because of backstabbings.
难忘时光 必须散席 留下我….Hammerrhoids zombies that succeeded would forget their comrades and desert them.

快乐时 抱着时…………………….….In good times, Hammerroid zombies would hug one another, talk cock and sing song;
那是至死不渝朋友……………….....Pretending that they would live and die just for each other.
决裂时 你为何以为再拖一会…...In crunch times, Hammerrhoid zombies rushed to cannibalise each other,
还有时候………………………………...without wasting a single, precious second.

即是多风光都要清醒…………..In celebration, Hammerroid zombies had to be even more alert against betrayals.
有几多掌声也是孤清…………..All the kind words spoken for each other were all fake and dubious.
你只可听到我大笑声 ………...One might hear Hammerroid zombies laughing with one another,
哭泣 也未放声 ………………….But one could never hear their true feeling being cried out to each other.

讲不出声 讲不出声……………Hammerroid zombies dared not trust each other to speak their heart to;
任由自己 半夜清醒……………But to torment themselves into sleepless nightmare.
我只不过偶尔受了惊………….Plotting and scheming against one another was such a horrifying experience,
于是 才遗忘本性 ……………..That all Hammerrhoid zombies had lost all their sense of humanity.

谁人能甘心一世一个人.......…Hammerrhoid zombies would rather betray everyone and remain the lone soul in the Party,
如何才得资格可爱人…..........So that they could pretend to love and suck up to 皇阿玛, and gain his adulation and support.
诚惶诚恐 只得我是 明白我….But serving 皇阿玛 was a terrifying experience, as he was an ungrateful jerk dumping and trashing people after use.

快乐时 抱着时……………………..In his hour of need, 皇阿玛 would grab his fellow Hammerrohoid zombies,
那是至死不渝朋友 ……........…Pretending to be their unwavering Big Brother till eternity.
决裂时 你为何以为再拖一会.…When no longer useful to him, 皇阿玛 would dump his Hammerrhoid zombie,
还有时候………......................Out of the Party, like haemorrhoids, without wasting a single second.

即是多风光都要清醒…..In good time, alertful Hammerrhoid zombies had to guard against 皇阿玛’s devious deception.
有几多掌声也是孤清….皇阿玛’s applause and praise for his Hammerrhoid zombies were all hollow and empty.
你只可听到我大笑声….All Hammerrhoid zombies wayang smiling face and flattering words for皇阿玛 to see and hear.
哭泣 也未放声………....But could only keep their tears of agony and frustation to themselves.

讲不出声 讲不出声….Hammerrhoid zombies dared not speak their voice to 皇阿玛, for fear of punishment and retribution.
任由自己 半夜清醒….But allowing 皇阿玛’s ego to be inflated even beyond deep in the night.
我只不过偶尔受了惊…Too frightened over repercussion to those Hammerrhoid zombies who dare to speak up,
于是 才遗忘本性……No one dare to speak the truth, making 皇阿玛’s megalomaniac to grow and forget his own self.

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[deepblue0911]

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才大气粗。佩服！

 

[skponggol]

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八阿哥 Chapter

Multi-Millionaire 八阿哥's Pathetic Attempt To Look Like a 'Regular' Guy
[video=youtube;LTPWkk3zjLs]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTPWkk3zjLs[/video]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTPWkk3zjLs

Like Phony Mitt, his fellow Harvard alumni elite, 八阿哥 had been trying to integrate into the local community by wayang around as a typical ‘Regular Guy’.

八阿哥, who had been eating regularly at expensive restaurants with his corporate vultures, suddenly discovered the cheapo local street food was more tasty. He had become a local food guru posting pictures of his ‘favourite’ street food on his Facebook. It was as unbelievable as Donald Trump suddenly confessing his great love for budget Hotel 81 for his rendezvous heist as compared to posh luxury hotels.

八阿哥, who used to travel on corporate jets and limousine, also suddenly discovered his great love for the public transport and posting picture of public transport on his Facebook. Although he had been wayang around as the only MP who regularly took public transport, he was inexplicably silent during the parliament debate on the messy MRT operation. Did he really have nothing to contribute to the public transport operation despite his ‘wealth of experience’ with the local public transport? Or, like Phony Mitt, it was all for show only?

Like Phony Mitt with that notorious photo, 八阿哥 also had his infamous photo on the cover of the American Lawyer where he was snobbishly surrounded with dollar notes. Like Phony Mitt who made his millions with his Bain Capital vultures without any empathy to the ‘Regular Guys’, 八阿哥 had made his millions with the corporate vultures also without any empathy to the ‘Regular Guys’.

Through his carefully-choreographed Facebook posts, the notoriously stupid Hammerrhoid zombies were duped into believing and supporting the growing ‘八爷党’. These congenital numbskulls actually convinced that ‘八贤王’, who spoke with a foreign but exotic ABC accent, was just like ‘us’….another typical chow Ah-Beng.


But the real question is: who is the real 八阿哥? What was he really like when he did not wayang around? What did he really like to eat, how did he really travel and where did he really live,….especially when he was far away, back to his real home with his real family in the Northern Capital……Why didn’t he post any real picture of that on his Facebook? Like Phony Mitt, what was he really trying to hide?......


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[skponggol]

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皇阿玛 Chapter

‘大蓝朝’变天!!!.....步步惊心…..

The historic day when the leader of Great Blue Party (or simply ‘Tua Lan Chiow’) changed colour !!!.....from Brown to Yellow !!!

JBJ Magnus 禅位于皇阿玛……….皇阿玛登上受禅坛，接受玉玺，登基称帝。
[video=youtube;nqG6LIdNw4o]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqG6LIdNw4o[/video]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqG6LIdNw4o

After all the wayang show to pretend that he was humble and unambitious, 皇阿玛 believed that the stupid Hammerrhoid zombies were duped enough for him to take the final step to the ‘Tua Lan Chiow’ throne.

JBJ Magnus submitted his enforced ‘Manifesto of Abdication’ to 皇阿玛 during the Party AGM at the Terrace of Abdication:

“The rule of the Minority in the Hammer has become weak and is not as good as the other Parties in their proper positions. The Hammer was in total disarray and chaos since the day of our Minority Founder. During the period of my reign, even greater disorder developed. All evils behave recklessly.

I relied on the MP for 后港 to set our Party free from this difficult situation and remove all evils to ensure the tranquility of our Party.

I myself alone would not be able to secure stability and obedience for the Chinese cadreship under my jurisdiction.

The present MP for 后港 inherited his Chinese Nantah Spirit and is also brilliant in subduing his Chinese cadres. He has the capability to undertake same great task as that of a ‘Tua Lan Chiow’ Head. He has the spirit of the Party and his Chinese credentials is acknowledged by all.

The great responsibility is now yours and you will accept this high office to comfort all by your obedience to the decree of Heaven!”

The Chinese Hammerrhoid zombies hailed: “万岁! 万岁!! 万万岁!!!”

“Here is 朕 decree: an amnesty for free Party T-shirts is hereby proclaimed. The name of 朕 Party motto is changed to ‘MIW-Lite’. The name of 朕 reign is now officially ‘瘤逞强元年’ (Malignant Tumour)!” - 皇阿玛

“皇阿玛, there is only one sun in the sky so we too should have only one ruler. Since this ‘Keling-kia’ has abdicated, it is proper to send him to a distance. Please name the place for this ‘Keling-kia’,” 鹿鼎公韦爵爷

“朕 confer on this Ah-Neh the title of the Lord of 'Karang-guni' and he should leave this place at once. He should loiter around the streets to tout his pathetic books and clear his bankruptcy without any Party support,” 皇阿玛

“I’m grateful to 皇阿玛, I’m grateful to 皇阿玛, I’m grateful to 皇阿玛……..” JBJ Magnus bowed down and thanked 皇阿玛 profusely.

“Putting one ‘Tua Lan Chiow’ Head in power while castrating another was routine in the old days. Now the present leader is kind and has spared your dignity from being expelled. He has conferred on you the title of the Lord of 'Karang-guni'. You should loiter and tout openly in the streets instantly. Don’t ever come back! Get Lost!” 韦爵爷

“皇阿玛, you are invited to offer your thanks to the Heaven and Earth,” the Chinese Hammerrhoid zombies pleaded.

As 皇阿玛 was praying to the Heaven and Earth, a strong wind came over and blew out his Hammerrhoid Flame. Perhaps, a divine curse over his treachery betrayal of JBJ Magnus.


As news spread all over the Land that JBJ Magnus was overthrown because of his skin colour, the Minority community cried out in anger:

“We’ll be avenged!!!”…….


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[skponggol]

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太子爷 Chapter

意難忘: My Unforgettable Memory as your MP

逃亡人的目屎: The Tears of a Backstabbed Hammerrhoid Fugitive…..
[video=youtube;lbmvbK_Jv-s]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lbmvbK_Jv-s[/video]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lbmvbK_Jv-s

黑暗的 Hammer 生活, 　呼人心驚惶.
少年彼時, 　滿腹的熱情, 　漸漸會消失.
逃亡人的運命, 　永遠未快活.

目屎啊, 　目屎啊, 　為何流未離.
有路無厝, 　茫茫前程, 　暗淡的人生.

(刘老大啊!!!!)

無情的 WP 人生, 　呼人心頭冷.
Hammer 兄弟, 　背后刀槍來, 　Wayang 過日子.
刘老大 picks MP, 　马屁爭相報.

目屎啊, 　目屎啊, 　罪惡洗未清.
改頭換面, 　重新做人, 　好好過一生.

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[skponggol]

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太子爷 Chapter

Even though 太子爷 enjoyed his ladies’ luck inside the Hammer Party, he was still unable to forget his fond memories with his Angel妃. When he finally met his Angel妃, 太子爷 begged her to join him at ‘Tua Lan Chiow’.

가을동화: Hammer in My Heart (‘大蓝朝’生死恋)….. 太子爷 tried to ‘Reason’ with his Angel妃 and made her a Hammerrhoid zombie….
[video=youtube;045R4vlvESA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=045R4vlvESA[/video]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=045R4vlvESA

내게 뒤돌아서지 말아요 ……………………………............Don’t turn away from me!
나의 눈을 보아요 ……………………………………............…Look into my eyes,
온세상 하얗던 그때의 약속 잊었나요 ……….............All the country is White,
왜 날 포기하려고 하죠 ……………………………..............But I have not forgotten my promise to make you Blue.

그댄 그게 쉽나요 ………………………………………............Why, have you given up so easily,
내게는 이렇게 어려운 일인 건가요 ……………............On becoming a Hammerrhoid zombie?
처음부터 우리는 시작되어선 안되는 사랑이라고 …….But to me, it was so difficult to be re-humanised.

눈물섞인 애원이 더욱 그대를 놓을수가 없네요 ….....From the beginning, maybe,
내게서 그대는 사라져선 안되는 ………………………….....My love for ‘Tua Lan Chiow’ shouldn’t have started.
빛이었음을 아나요 ……………………………………………….....But now, my tears are mixed with pleading,
그대가 떠나면 나의 모든세상도 사라진다는걸 ….......Begging you not to let go from the Hammer.
잊지는 말아요 ………………………………………………………....I would not forget to put more of Hammer into you,
숨을 쉬고 싶어요 그대 사랑안에서 ………………………...So that you will never disappear from my life, again.

그대 생각만으로 웃음이 나요 …………………….Know that you are my light,
나에게 힘이 되어요 …………………………………….If you leave the Hammer, you take away my whole world.
그대 생각만으로 눈물이 나요 …………………….Don’t forget that, if you were to disappear from Hammer,
모든것이 두려워 ………………………………………...I would not be able to breathe in all of 皇阿玛’s megalomaniac rhetorics,
내게서 그대는 사라져선 안되는 ………………….Without you by my side to intoxicate me.

빛이었음을 아나요 ……………………………………………..I try to fake smile whenever I see our 皇阿玛.
그대가 떠나면 나의 모든 세상도 사라진다는걸 …But, it becomes so hard on me to wayang for him.
잊지는 말아요 …………………………………………………….I cry whenever I think of our ugly Hammerrhoid ‘chiobus’.
숨을 쉬고 싶어요 그대 사랑안에서……………………..I’m scared of seeing their awful faces everyday, so please be with me….


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[skponggol]

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皇阿玛 Chapter

A dedication to mourn the unjust fall of JBJ Magnus…..

哭惹耶……………….Cry, the Beloved Country!
[video=youtube;sBlrz03pvDo]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sBlrz03pvDo[/video]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sBlrz03pvDo

苍天哪,………………………………....O, ‘Tua Lan Chiow’,
你为何急匆匆将他……………....…Why did you throw the Spirit of Anson out into the air,
交与秋风?…………………………….…Just because he is a Minority?

大地呀,…………………………………..O, 皇阿玛,
你为何急匆匆将他………………....Why did you drive the Lion of ChengSan into the ground,
揽入怀中?…………………………..….Just because he is a non-Chinese?

情愿以死,………………………………..The People of this Land are willing to sacrifice their lives,
换他的生,………………………………..So that this Democracy Icon will carry on,
好率咱将士再出征!..................And lead his warriors to fight for Freedom and Justice!

鞠躬尽瘁,………………………………..His devotion and love to this country,
谁能比,…………………………………...Is totally unparalled, and,
一身洁白谁能及!………………….....His unbending principle for Liberty is simply incomparable!

噢, 噢, …………………………………….Ah, Ah,
苍天你太不公啊,……………………...O, ‘Tua Lan Chiow’, you are so unfair,
大地你太绝情,………………………....O, 皇阿玛, you are so ungrateful,
空留下八仙兵图和瑶琴………….....Leaving behind an empty promise of Racial Harmony and Ethnic Equality.

噢, 噢, ……………………………………..Ah, Ah,
蜀国交付与何人？………………......Which Minority would ever dare to hand their destiny to the Hammer?
生生痛死蜀人心!……………….….....After it has broken the hearts of every single Minority in this Land!


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