Frodo is a shining example of what a real husband is, single income and struggle and sacrifice so much so that the wife and kids have a good life. Very respectable.
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Rental and Resale (All about Rental and Resale prices in Iskandar)
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Frodo is a shining example of what a real husband is, single income and struggle and sacrifice so much so that the wife and kids have a good life. Very respectable.
Yeah, I thought of divorce many times before, even flushed my marriage ring with his name inscribed on it down the toilet bowl already but still keeping the diamond engagement suffer ring he gave me.... My kids even ask me to divorce him and they wanna follow me ...we r open to it actually but still have some love between us and he has not done anything bad other than difficulty keeping a job, and I am prob too soft hearted...but I Guess I have my limits too and after a year without a job, I am running out of patience...the JB house works out as a way for us to coexist together, I can finally work less and he can finally fulfill his dreams of doing business as I have many relatives in Malaysia, many running businesses and some quite successful...one Cousin has business in China and drives a Porsche and another just conferred Datuk...perhaps they can help him...
Sorry for being brutal here, but no one would want to help anyone who just wants a free ride, your husband never try hard at anything because you let him you see your attitude, you feel his weak point is only not having a job and done nothing wrong, but that is the biggest wrong a man can have in a marriage, not having a job when he is healthy and educated simply means he is not fulfilled his role in providing for the wife and kids, and at the same time he is really dragging you down and you see it as a minor issue? You have to fix him to save your marriage.
Sorry and sorry again.
Hi freedom, eh... aren't you also from fuckwarezone?
Actually, you quite surprise me... I wouldn't expect to meet a doctor in such a forum!
Also surprised about your situation. Like being worried about Singapore's future, etc. My doctor friends are all the typical family people deeply rooted in SG who upgrade their lifestyle after every few years. Buy new (usually bigger and more "atas") properties in SG, new cars, and have their kids go to good schools here. None talk about doomsday in SG. But all of them are specialists earning decent salaries. Although those not in private practice often bitch about salaries not being high enough! For your case, I don't think GP is that bad though. Locum is good.
None of them would consider moving over to Iskandar or JB, either for investment or retirement. One used to live there with his family. He bought his house years back but decided to sell it off last year at profit. They realize the traveling in and out is not feasible and they still prefer their kids to be educated in Singapore and grow up here.
Don't worry. Singapore is not going to become that bad in future. Since you have a respectable career, why not find out how you can maybe migrate to countries like the US, UK or Australia? Your kids can also have good education next time. To me, those are the places for retirement... not JB! Sorry, just my frank opinion.
Actually, you quite surprise me... I wouldn't expect to meet a doctor in such a forum!
Also surprised about your situation. Like being worried about Singapore's future, etc. My doctor friends are all the typical family people deeply rooted in SG who upgrade their lifestyle after every few years. Buy new (usually bigger and more "atas") properties in SG, new cars, and have their kids go to good schools here. None talk about doomsday in SG. But all of them are specialists earning decent salaries. Although those not in private practice often bitch about salaries not being high enough! For your case, I don't think GP is that bad though. Locum is good.
None of them would consider moving over to Iskandar or JB, either for investment or retirement. One used to live there with his family. He bought his house years back but decided to sell it off last year at profit. They realize the traveling in and out is not feasible and they still prefer their kids to be educated in Singapore and grow up here.
Don't worry. Singapore is not going to become that bad in future. Since you have a respectable career, why not find out how you can maybe migrate to countries like the US, UK or Australia? Your kids can also have good education next time. To me, those are the places for retirement... not JB! Sorry, just my frank opinion.
Actually, I know of many doctors who bought there...2 friends I know personally, a GP in Bestari Heights and a surgeon in Horizon Hills and some other Doctors whom I do not know personally have retired there....
My extended family is in Malaysia and it is near to Sg where I can return to work....do not think I can nor want to work in other countries for other reasons I have not mentioned. Anyway, I am not a specialist earning big bucks so unlike specialist couples I cannot keep up with the rat race here....
Wah....I don't dare accept such accolades....in any case my wife will surely give a deep discount! :o
As shared before, had we continued living in Singapore, all we would have now would still be our HDB flat. Our SG car would have been gone too because I don't think we can afford the big cash outlay required either to renew the COE or to buy a 2nd hand car (new car is simply fat hope). Moving over to JB gives me a rare chance in my lifetime (seriously!) to own another property (or maybe two:p) which allows me to hand something down to my children in the form of properties, instead of just HDB bedrooms.:(
My sis-in-law who is more loaded, she and my brother (both working) are deeply insured until if they should depart from this world (note I am not cursing them!) their kids basically can no need to work anymore. I...or rather my children...don't have this luxury, even though I reckon I am still worth more dead than alive, being modestly and minimally term-insured to sufficiently pay off all the property loans after lessing funeral expenses:p, they need not worry about having a roof or two over their heads though it means they have to buck up to the new reality and work for their keep.
Yep, we still struggle with our expenses now, even after moving over to JB. But the fact that things are cheaper in JB (also the favourable currency exchange) also means that with that same amount of struggle we actually have "more" than before, which is the irony. For example, I had paid off my Singapore car loan barely just a month before it was scrapped, having taken a full loan on the remaining 7.5 years of the car when I bought it 2nd hand. And at nearly the same time I also paid off my bike loan. (see everything on hire purchase at full tenure, the poor Singaporean that I am:() While it would be ideal to have the freed up cash to go into savings, that would not have worked out because in JB you definitely need a car to move around. So the cash that was "freed" was simply redirected to the new MY car that the whole family now enjoy. New car with no COE and no 10 year usage nonsense! And I still have my bike for daily commuting to work....which works for us...for now.
As for sacrifices, my family, not just me, all made sacrifices. My kids had to give up regular trips to the libraries (which they still miss a lot), give up their dance and gymnastics classes in Singapore, the neighbours' kids etc. But these initial trade-offs have been well compensated over time, I hope. Now they have more running space (including running up the stairs), more pets (which also means more sai-kang aka shit job), wife have a small patch of grass to experiment with planting etc. So overall I am quite pleased and feel blessed with the new circumstances, though the anxiety over finances continually hangs over me. But life has to go on lor...I just hope things brighten up within the next three years, about the time the JB condo is completed and monthly mortgage on it begins. I suppose that's the most I can get out of the little I have, at my present circumstances. Wealth would probably elude me the rest of my life...but I hope I can still remain relatively healthy enough to enjoy my remaining "useful" life.:p
What did your husband used to do for a living? Why so hard to find job/career? Expectation too high? Really too niche of an industry? Very curious
Thanks for the frank sharing.
My eldest brother was out of job for a very very very long time and could not hold on to any job. He was depressed but still holding out for that good job that would come by his way. It's a man's pride thing. At his age (over 40 then and now 50) he was of the view that he needed a job that pays well enough, and so that MacDonalds job simply cannot make it. He is in IT line. Good thing is that he is not married so still not that bad, though still bad. Thank God he recently found a job and I hope he can stick with it. So I am not sure what your husband is going through. Is he depressed? I think being out of job for a long while will really sink a man's pride down. Man, more than woman, have this ego thing...like it or not...it's that self esteem or respect that man needs. Being held in contempt or talked about condescendingly would not help, in my opinion. To talk about divorce may just send his world crashing on him. I'm not siding him (if he is really acting as an arsehole he needs a royal kick in the butt) nor ignoring your pains. I believe you and your kids are also affected in no small way. So I sincerely wish things will turn out well for you and family soon.
He studied Engineering overseas and has a degree...used to be an engineer then switched to Sales account manager...was doing well in Jap MNC when headhunted to join ST engineering...couldn't get along with boss and was retrenched soon after our ROM....nightmare started then...That is why I say Sg GLC has tortured him and even the Sg government never gave him a chance in MOE as a sec school teacher last time, though now asking him to go for interview to be a pri school teacher....just feel very played out by the government, dun understand why he is so stuck here...
Very true....one key reason why JB and not other countries is precisely because of the proximity reason. Perhaps many people who wants to retire do not want to retire from the familiar world we used to be in. Some people can, they can simply pack up and go to a different country, forsaking all else. For me, I would prefer to be close to the land of my birth. It's that attachment thing...or maybe just sentimental reasons. But for now it is purely because I need SG dollars to pay for living in JB.:p
Think your brother like my hubby situation...IT is really bad... I believe it is because government is hiring cheaper FT in IT esp from Pinoyland....
On paper, i don't see why he can't find something... "on paper", but as we all know humans are just way too complicated. Could be a self esteem thing.
i am in IT. i think i know what is going on in IT or Electronics.
perhaps it is not your husband's fault. it is very hard for an engineering graduate to find a new job in his 40s. i know some phd who get retrenched or their contracts expired. cannot find a job and in the end they go to china and work in china companies.
even now we have a former colleague. she already stays home jobless more than one year. she is around 45 and a phd specialized in optics.
that is why many people are preparing for bad days. In 40s or 50, you are virtually senile in IT, slow to learn and have a high salary that is good enough to hire two young postgraduates. can you do two persons' programming work in 40s? impossible. the company can easily replace you with one of countless candidates.
perhaps it is not your husband's fault. it is very hard for an engineering graduate to find a new job in his 40s. i know some phd who get retrenched or their contracts expired. cannot find a job and in the end they go to china and work in china companies.
even now we have a former colleague. she already stays home jobless more than one year. she is around 45 and a phd specialized in optics.
that is why many people are preparing for bad days. In 40s or 50, you are virtually senile in IT, slow to learn and have a high salary that is good enough to hire two young postgraduates. can you do two persons' programming work in 40s? impossible. the company can easily replace you with one of countless candidates.
He switched to Sales quite early, so not into the technical aspects but problem is he cannot meet sales target...
This has turned into a talent discussion now
I likeYou career is like your business. Look at yourself and ask, are you going to be competitive in 2-3 years time, are you skills going to be needed, what value do i bring to the organisation? Technology & business is moving faster than ever, you can't keep up, you will get left behind. One big IT dinosaur just retrenched 100k employees worldwide, what to do, cut non essential staff. Not personal just business.
Don't get complacent just because you landed a S$15k/month job, if someone can do it better than you and cheaper than you, you better do something about it, take more responsibility or whatever.
This has turned into a talent discussion now
You career is like your business. Look at yourself and ask, are you going to be competitive in 2-3 years time, are you skills going to be needed, what value do i bring to the organisation? Technology & business is moving faster than ever, you can't keep up, you will get left behind. One big IT dinosaur just retrenched 100k employees worldwide, what to do, cut non essential staff. Not personal just business.
Don't get complacent just because you landed a S$15k/month job, if someone can do it better than you and cheaper than you, you better do something about it, take more responsibility or whatever.
I wish a $15K a month job will land on me!
I wish a $15K a month job will land on me!
I've met many former top talents, some make like 30k/month not even including bonus and stock yet, but when the company bust, they can't find anything coz they only know how to do one thing.
For those bringing up young kids, tell them do study analytics and data science. Companies will pay big bucks for them next time.
Sometimes, "top talent" is a hype. It's "who you know", in other words, "connection" that matter most to land top job. While they say, EQ is more important than IQ, it simply means who is a better "weight lifter" in terms of "carrying balls"
. Unfortunately, most people who choose Engineering and IT are more left brain, than right brain and have to work doubly hard to practice weight lifting or be contended to suffer the consequences for lower paying jobs:(Congratulations
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