With a password on and if they crack it, the data will be lost forever. The only exception is when it is done with the PC that you sync with. I have seen the password crack offer in some places but when asked they will tell you that data intact cannot be guaranteed - which in their marketing spiel means we take your money, we unlock the phone but no data, too bad as we did not guarantee.
Steve jobs was nuts about his employees having their password feaure on. He used to do spot checks. I am sure he won't be bothered if it could broken easily even when brute force is used.
You need specialist software the do that.
Just be glad that it is password protected. The data will not be wiped out after 10 times unless you set the option on.
As some people suggested, best hope is call apple, approach the 2nd hand store near where you lost it and offer a substantial reward. They will pass the message around take a cut whoch they will negotiate amongst themselves.
I know it is a difficult time but take solace that it is password protected.