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Let laugh at Tottenham Hostpur thread
- Thread starter Sideswipe
- Start date
Bentley the Bigot shouldve joined Liverpool when he had the chance. But of coz, he wanted a guarantee in the first team (vying with Alonso & Benanyoun) Rafa told him to farked off & wished him all the best at White Hart Lane. At this time of writing, Mark Hughes' Man City or even his previous club at Ewood park is doing reasonably well without him.
Now I finally understood why Arsene Wenger sold Bentley off. It wasn't a mistake after lookin at his move to Spurs:o
Wanker sold Bentley becoz he wanted a move as he's getting limited playing time while at ARSE-nal. Atcually, wanker did regret for not keeping him. Not as a squad player but rather for his nationality.
While bentley was at Blackburn, the game suited him as Hughes gave him the freedom to raid both flanks, interchanging with Pedersen with Emerton covering both of them.
Too bad for him when he joined Spurs. How do you fit Bentley in Spurs? There's Jenas, Zokora, Modric & holding player Huddlestone. And even if had the ball, who does he pass it to? Bent is obviously uncomfortable with his new role. Dos Santos is lightweight. Pavulchenko needs time to adjust. So Bentley resorted to taking pot shots from long distances.
The problem with Spurs is that they sold their best but bought players based on promises (Modric, Corluka, Bentley included) With the money from Keane (GBP20mil), Defoe(undisclosed, rumored to be GBP12mil) & record sale of berbatov (GBP30.75mil),Paul Robinson (GBP3.5mil), Chimbonda, Steed Malbranque & Tanio(undisclosed, rumored a combined GBP10mil) ) If u add that up, that's close to GBP76mil!!!!! And who does Ramos buy? Some unknown Brazilian keeper plus some unknown players, as i suspect that ramos buys them for their ability to speak Spanish, doesnt matter if they cant play football EPL style.
I wish all Spore Spurs all the best. See you at the Championship next season!!!!
Anyway, to me Spurs and Newcastle are two similar teams. Team filled with egoistic players who think they are superstars. Deserve to prop the table. :o
I,
From England Number One
To nobody wants
From Tottenham
To eat ham
From Whitehart Lane
To broken heart land
It's really funny
I'm not laughing
Wa hahahahaha....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwG-3KjxzG0
From England Number One
To nobody wants
From Tottenham
To eat ham
From Whitehart Lane
To broken heart land
It's really funny
I'm not laughing
Wa hahahahaha....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwG-3KjxzG0
Some jokes about Spurs that i found on the net.
I met this really kinky girl last night. 'Humiliate me,' she said ... So I bought her a Tottenham shirt
Haringey council has blocked Tottenham's plans to build a new ground on Northumberland Park. A town hall source said: 'We don't mind having a funfair there once a year, but a circus every fortnight is a bit much.'
'I was playing Scrabble and had enough letters to make 'Tottenham Hotspur Football Club'. I was gutted when I found out it was only worth two points.'
Tesco are releasing new Oxo cubes in Spurs colours. Customers are told to look out for laughing stocks.
I met this really kinky girl last night. 'Humiliate me,' she said ... So I bought her a Tottenham shirt
Haringey council has blocked Tottenham's plans to build a new ground on Northumberland Park. A town hall source said: 'We don't mind having a funfair there once a year, but a circus every fortnight is a bit much.'
'I was playing Scrabble and had enough letters to make 'Tottenham Hotspur Football Club'. I was gutted when I found out it was only worth two points.'
Tesco are releasing new Oxo cubes in Spurs colours. Customers are told to look out for laughing stocks.
A young boy goes to social services and tells them he has nowhere to live. 'What about your parents?' asks the social worker. 'No, they beat me,' says the boy. 'What about your grandparents?' says the social worker. 'No, they beat me even harder!' says the boy. 'Well ... where do you want to stay then?' replies the social worker. 'Tottenham,' says the boy. 'They don't beat anyone.
What do a toothpick and Tottenham have in common? They both have two points
Juande Ramos, shortly after another training session, comments to the head groundsman at White Hart Lane how impressive the pitch is looking. 'It ought to,' replies the groundsman. 'We put 70 million quid's worth of manure on it every week.'
I just went down to the newsagents and bought Tottenham Hotspur magazine. Thank goodness they had porn mags to hide it in.
What does a Spurs fan do after he sees his team win? Turns off the Xbox
After leaving San Siro, Jose Mourinho was asked if he was going to help Spurs get out of their slump. He turned around and said, 'No way, I ain't that special'.
What do a toothpick and Tottenham have in common? They both have two points
Juande Ramos, shortly after another training session, comments to the head groundsman at White Hart Lane how impressive the pitch is looking. 'It ought to,' replies the groundsman. 'We put 70 million quid's worth of manure on it every week.'
I just went down to the newsagents and bought Tottenham Hotspur magazine. Thank goodness they had porn mags to hide it in.
What does a Spurs fan do after he sees his team win? Turns off the Xbox
After leaving San Siro, Jose Mourinho was asked if he was going to help Spurs get out of their slump. He turned around and said, 'No way, I ain't that special'.
Apparently the entire Tottenham squad have been busy honing their skills playing the computer game Championship Manager. Sadly it seems Juande misunderstood and thinks they want to play for a Championship manager.
Contrary to what you may think, Spurs are the strongest team in the league at the moment. Sure, aren't they holding everyone else up?
What do the Premier League and a cowboy have in common? They both have spurs at their feet.
A man was found dead floating in the Thames, wearing a blond wig, full make-up, bra, knickers, suspenders and a Spurs shirt. Before informing the next of kin the police removed the Spurs shirt to save the family embarrassment.
What would an improved version of Spurs be called? Newcastle United.
Did you hear that Juande Ramos was clocked doing 169mph on the M1 coming back from Stoke? Apparently he was just so desperate for three points.
Is it just me or are Spurs the team to beat this season? Everyone's at it.
Contrary to what you may think, Spurs are the strongest team in the league at the moment. Sure, aren't they holding everyone else up?
What do the Premier League and a cowboy have in common? They both have spurs at their feet.
A man was found dead floating in the Thames, wearing a blond wig, full make-up, bra, knickers, suspenders and a Spurs shirt. Before informing the next of kin the police removed the Spurs shirt to save the family embarrassment.
What would an improved version of Spurs be called? Newcastle United.
Did you hear that Juande Ramos was clocked doing 169mph on the M1 coming back from Stoke? Apparently he was just so desperate for three points.
Is it just me or are Spurs the team to beat this season? Everyone's at it.
A man is sitting in a pub with his jack russell dog one Sunday afternoon. The football results are coming up on the television in the corner: 'Stoke City 2, Tottenham Hotspur 1,' reads the announcer. Suddenly the jack russell jumps up and shouts out, 'Oh, no, not again.' The shocked landlord says, 'That's amazing. Why did he say that when it was announced that Tottenham lost?' 'Because he's a Spurs supporter,' the dog's owner replies. The landlord then asks what the dog says when Tottenham win a match, to which the man replies, 'I don't know. I've only had him six months.'
When a groggy Vedran Corluka regained consciousness in the ambulance leaving the Britannia Stadium on Sunday he asked medical staff who he was. On being told he played football for Tottenham Hotspur he lapsed into a coma.
All trains through White Hart Lane have been cancelled due to a massive points failure.
What's the difference between Juande Ramos and a cowboy? A cowboy wears Spurs on his boots whereas Ramos is a poo manager.
What does THFC stand for? Tottenham Heading For the Championship.
When a groggy Vedran Corluka regained consciousness in the ambulance leaving the Britannia Stadium on Sunday he asked medical staff who he was. On being told he played football for Tottenham Hotspur he lapsed into a coma.
All trains through White Hart Lane have been cancelled due to a massive points failure.
What's the difference between Juande Ramos and a cowboy? A cowboy wears Spurs on his boots whereas Ramos is a poo manager.
What does THFC stand for? Tottenham Heading For the Championship.
A little boy gets £10 for his birthday and rushes down to the sports shop to buy the new football he has been desperate for. He gives the ball to the shopkeeper, who says, 'Sorry, son, this ball is £20. You only have £10'. The boy says, 'OK, if you blindfold me and I can guess the name of the club on any ball, will you give it to me for £10?' He agrees and gives the boy an Arsenal ball. 'I can hear cannons blasting, so it's an Arsenal ball.' Next he gives him a Millwall ball: 'I hear lions, so it's Millwall.' Amazed, the shopkeeper says, 'Get this and you can have it for nothing.' The boy listens and says Spurs. The man asks if he's heard a cockerel. 'No,' says the boy. 'It's going down.'
What's the difference between Bigfoot and the Spurs defence? Bigfoot has been spotted several times.
Spurs have been forced to rename their ground 'White Lane' because their 'Hart' was surgically removed when Berbatov and Keane were sold.
I was walking home the other evening and saw half the spurs team playing football with a hedgehog. I was going to call the RSPCA but the hedgehog was 4-0 up!!
What's the difference between Bigfoot and the Spurs defence? Bigfoot has been spotted several times.
Spurs have been forced to rename their ground 'White Lane' because their 'Hart' was surgically removed when Berbatov and Keane were sold.
I was walking home the other evening and saw half the spurs team playing football with a hedgehog. I was going to call the RSPCA but the hedgehog was 4-0 up!!
And Now We've Got Songs About Spurs Too
To the tune of American Pie
A long,Long time ago,
I can still remember,
How the Carling Cup win made them smile,
And they knew this could be their chance,
To finally make that big advance,
And maybe, break the top 4 for a while.
But transfer windows made them shiver,
As Robbie Keane went off to Liver.....
Pool, and Berbs to Man U,
You can't believe it can you?
Tears of laughter we all cried,
As on Bent they have to rely,
And Frasier Campbell really tried,
The Day That Tottenham Died !
So my my kiss UEFA goodbye,
When Comoli sold the Goalie,
Well it made Levy Cry,
When you play for Spurs you kiss Capello goodbye,
Soon your gonna be a Magpie,
I bet you wish you were a Magpie.
Did your players eat the poisoned food,
To let Arsenal in and Spoil your mood,
If the fansite tells you so,
Do you believe in Chas n Dave,
Can their music save you from an early grave,
And can Dawson teach me how to run real slow,
Well, I knew you were set for a let down,
When the Spaniard signed the Blackburn clown,
You sacked poor Martin Jol,
And now everyone just laughs out loud,
I have long been laughing at your lack of luck,
Your delusion means I couldn't give a .....,
That to the table bottom you are stuck,
The day the Tottenham died,
I started singing........
So my my kiss UEFA goodbye,
When Comoli sold the goalie,
Well it made Levy cry,
When you play for Spurs you kiss Capello goodbye,
Soon your gonna be a Magpie,
I bet you wish you were a Magpie.
To the tune of American Pie
A long,Long time ago,
I can still remember,
How the Carling Cup win made them smile,
And they knew this could be their chance,
To finally make that big advance,
And maybe, break the top 4 for a while.
But transfer windows made them shiver,
As Robbie Keane went off to Liver.....
Pool, and Berbs to Man U,
You can't believe it can you?
Tears of laughter we all cried,
As on Bent they have to rely,
And Frasier Campbell really tried,
The Day That Tottenham Died !
So my my kiss UEFA goodbye,
When Comoli sold the Goalie,
Well it made Levy Cry,
When you play for Spurs you kiss Capello goodbye,
Soon your gonna be a Magpie,
I bet you wish you were a Magpie.
Did your players eat the poisoned food,
To let Arsenal in and Spoil your mood,
If the fansite tells you so,
Do you believe in Chas n Dave,
Can their music save you from an early grave,
And can Dawson teach me how to run real slow,
Well, I knew you were set for a let down,
When the Spaniard signed the Blackburn clown,
You sacked poor Martin Jol,
And now everyone just laughs out loud,
I have long been laughing at your lack of luck,
Your delusion means I couldn't give a .....,
That to the table bottom you are stuck,
The day the Tottenham died,
I started singing........
So my my kiss UEFA goodbye,
When Comoli sold the goalie,
Well it made Levy cry,
When you play for Spurs you kiss Capello goodbye,
Soon your gonna be a Magpie,
I bet you wish you were a Magpie.
Aaahh, Another Cheerful Thought
When Robbie Keane left Wolves, they got relegated.
When Robbie Keane left Coventry, they got relegated.
When Robbie Keane left Leeds, they got relegated.
When Robbie Keane left Spurs, ............
When Robbie Keane left Wolves, they got relegated.
When Robbie Keane left Coventry, they got relegated.
When Robbie Keane left Leeds, they got relegated.
When Robbie Keane left Spurs, ............
don't need to take it too seriously, just for laughs. 
Seriously, Tottenham are in deep trouble now. Which team would dare to lose to them now. Do Bolton on Sunday dare / want to be the first team this season to give Spurs 3 points. Nobody want to lose to that shit poor team at the bottom. On a reserve physiological scenario, it's Bolton who will be extra motivated to beat a demoralized Spurs.
The pressure of scoring 90 marks in a exam is NOTHING compared to the pressure of getting 50 marks to pass a exam.
Seriously, Tottenham are in deep trouble now. Which team would dare to lose to them now. Do Bolton on Sunday dare / want to be the first team this season to give Spurs 3 points. Nobody want to lose to that shit poor team at the bottom. On a reserve physiological scenario, it's Bolton who will be extra motivated to beat a demoralized Spurs.
The pressure of scoring 90 marks in a exam is NOTHING compared to the pressure of getting 50 marks to pass a exam.
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