women and mens' perspectives.

[erection2015]

Woman 1: I had sex last night, did you?

Woman 2: Yes.

Woman 1: Was it good?

Woman 2: No, it was a disaster... My husband came home, ate his dinner in
three minutes, got on top of me, finished having sex in five minutes, rolled
over and fell asleep in two minutes. How was yours?

Woman 1: Oh it was amazing! My husband came home and took me out to a
romantic dinner. After dinner we walked for an hour. When we came home
he lit the candles around the house and we had an hour of foreplay. We then
had an hour long session of fantastic sex and afterwards talked for an hour.
It was like a fairytale!


At the very same time their husbands were talking at work.



Husband 1: You wanted sex last night, how was it?

Husband 2: Great. I came home, dinner was on the table, I ate, screwed my
wife and fell asleep. It was great! What about you?

Husband 1: It was horrible. I came home, there's no dinner because they cut
the electricity because I hadn't paid the bill; so I had to take my wife out to
dinner which was so expensive that I didn't have money left for a cab. We had
to walk home which took an hour - and when we got home remember there
was no electricity so I had to light candles all over the house! I was so angry
that I couldn't get it up for an hour and then I couldn't come for another hour.
After I finally did, I was so aggravated that I couldn't fall asleep and my wife
was jabbering away for another damn hour.

 

[zhihau]

Woman 1: Oh it was amazing! My husband came home and took me out to a romantic dinner. After dinner we walked for an hour. When we came home he lit the candles around the house and we had an hour of foreplay. We then had an hour long session of fantastic sex and afterwards talked for an hour. It was like a fairytale!

Husband 1: It was horrible. I came home, there's no dinner because they cut the electricity because I hadn't paid the bill; so I had to take my wife out to dinner which was so expensive that I didn't have money left for a cab. We had to walk home which took an hour - and when we got home remember there was no electricity so I had to light candles all over the house! I was so angry that I couldn't get it up for an hour and then I couldn't come for another hour. After I finally did, I was so aggravated that I couldn't fall asleep and my wife was jabbering away for another damn hour.

heheh...

reminds me of a conclusion my friends and i came to a couple of years back, men loves SEX, women LOVES sex.

 

[erection2015]

hardwired slightly differently eh?

heheh...

reminds me of a conclusion my friends and i came to a couple of years back, men loves SEX, women LOVES sex.

 

[zhihau]

hardwired slightly differently eh?

i guess so

 

[Windsor]

hardwired slightly differently eh?

That's true bro.

Boobies and Willies

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of boobies are there?

The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there's three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a women's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions."

"Onions?"

"Yes, you see them and they make you cry."

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mom, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?"

The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his twenties, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his thirties and forties, it is a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree."


"A Christmas tree?"

"Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only.