Walk-in Interview for PAP MP Candidates

[scroobal]

Heartlander PAP MP Candidates Pogramme
Walk-in Interview - Marina Sands Seminar Room 12
First Tues of every month until 2015
7pm to 9pm.

Pre-requisites

- open to anyone above 21 including retirees
- general degree holder or below or successful individual with no scholarship or sponsorship
- working individual must be employed in position that evoke a sense of passion, creativity and community awareness in a non management position ( no foreign or local NGOs)
- parents or spouse must be born Singaporeans and continue to be Singaporeans
- parents or spouse must not hold any executive or higher position
- parents or spouse must not be linked to PA, grassroots organisations, GLC, OCBC etc (Civil Service timescale is acceptable)
- 6 degrees of separation will be strictly enforced for the immediate family where media is concerned
- must not own more than one car which should be below 1300 cc. ( weekend car or no car is preferable)
- must not have any relationship with spouses of PAP MPs
- has never patronised St James Power Station
- has never done the Hip Hop
- has never used the term "Post-65ers Generation"

Key Personal Attributes
- girl next door or boy that mother-in-law like type. Retirees must be able to hold court in a kopitiam.
- in a heterosexual relationship ( separate programme for those not in a heterosexual relationship - WIP)
- excellent people skills
- must not lie, mislead, omit material facts
- must not enagage in extra-marital sex

Note: All shortlisted candidates will be screened for online behaviour, explicit and compromising images, association with those on blacklist.

Post MP Contractual Disclosures
- not allowed to work in a GLC, OCBC, or in the same company of PAP MPs spouses
- must not take up directorship in any company
- cannot operate a proprietorship, partnerships or a company and bid for town council contracts
- must not be a member of business councils, chambers of commerce, employer interest groups or lobbying firms

Note: potential applicants should not contact grassroots orgqnisations, PA, PAP branch offices or branch office bearers. All queries will be handled at the Party Headquarters by Organising Secretary (Save the Party Programme)

 

[laksaboy]

Key Personal Attributes

- must not enagage in extra-marital sex

How about pre-marital sex? Or commercial sex?

 

[scroobal]

Called up Upper Changi and an Aunty sounding staff told me that they had similar queries. Told me to call back in a week's time as they are checking PA. so I asked why PA and the Aunty told me others also asked her the same question.

 

[chootchiew]

Just curious on pre requisites :
- has never patronised St James Power Station
If I never patronised ST james b4 but other station does it qualify ?

- has never done the Hip Hop
I never done hip-hop but I listen to hip-hop is it ok ?

 

[greenies]

Then, we will see no PAP MPs at next election.
No one is qualified...

 

[kingrant]

For once, failures and citizens without straight As in O or A levels can apply, you mean?

Hard to say if most or none of the jokers in this forum will be eligible.

Heartlander PAP MP Candidates Pogramme
Walk-in Interview - Marina Sands Seminar Room 12
First Tues of every month until 2015
7pm to 9pm.

Pre-requisites

- open to anyone above 21 including retirees
- general degree holder or below or successful individual with no scholarship or sponsorship
- working individual must be employed in position that evoke a sense of passion, creativity and community awareness in a non management position ( no foreign or local NGOs)
- parents or spouse must be born Singaporeans and continue to be Singaporeans
- parents or spouse must not hold any executive or higher position
- parents or spouse must not be linked to PA, grassroots organisations, GLC, OCBC etc (Civil Service timescale is acceptable)
- 6 degrees of separation will be strictly enforced for the immediate family where media is concerned
- must not own more than one car which should be below 1300 cc. ( weekend car or no car is preferable)
- must not have any relationship with spouses of PAP MPs
- has never patronised St James Power Station
- has never done the Hip Hop
- has never used the term "Post-65ers Generation"

Key Personal Attributes
- girl next door or boy that mother-in-law like type. Retirees must be able to hold court in a kopitiam.
- in a heterosexual relationship ( separate programme for those not in a heterosexual relationship - WIP)
- excellent people skills
- must not lie, mislead, omit material facts
- must not enagage in extra-marital sex

Note: All shortlisted candidates will be screened for online behaviour, explicit and compromising images, association with those on blacklist.

Post MP Contractual Disclosures
- not allowed to work in a GLC, OCBC, or in the same company of PAP MPs spouses
- must not take up directorship in any company
- cannot operate a proprietorship, partnerships or a company and bid for town council contracts
- must not be a member of business councils, chambers of commerce, employer interest groups or lobbying firms

Note: potential applicants should not contact grassroots orgqnisations, PA, PAP branch offices or branch office bearers. All queries will be handled at the Party Headquarters by Organising Secretary (Save the Party Programme)

 

[kingrant]

Commercial sex workers should be eligible, from the shortlist reqs.

How about pre-marital sex? Or commercial sex?

 

[Hawkeye1819]

Heartlander PAP MP Candidates Pogramme
Walk-in Interview - Marina Sands Seminar Room 12
First Tues of every month until 2015
7pm to 9pm.

Under new criteria, 100% of current PAP MPs will be disqualified. May as well form a new party and start from scratch.

 

[laksaboy]

For once, failures and citizens without straight As in O or A levels can apply, you mean?

Hard to say if most or none of the jokers in this forum will be eligible.

Maybe the PAP is trying to manufacture a 'Lee Li Lian' of their own... no degree never mind, no front teeth also never mind, if you can connect with the people you're good enough. All you need is a little grooming and training, which the PAP will provide.

Then in 2016, the PAP will send these heartland champions as suicide squad members to unsafe GRCs and SMCs. If the PAP loses, no loss of face for the elites who have multiple directorships.

 

[Debonerman]

I would have passed the said criteria except online behaviour. Would Alamaking aka Stompiss offer to lie and vouch for my cultured personality?

 

[kingrant]

The right strategy is pick who to fight where shrewdly. Of course, if the whole country is a potential electoral loss, then no need for strategy or good candidates - just anyhow hantam or apologise like shit on knees.

Then in 2016, the PAP will send these heartland champions as suicide squad members to unsafe GRCs and SMCs. If the PAP loses, no loss of face for the elites who have multiple directorships.

 

[Hawkeye1819]

The old formula of "talent scouting" as led to massive inbreeding. How to change the PAP if everyone is born and bred of the same gene pool, cut from the same cloth? The only way is to overthrow completely the old recruitment criteria and process and start anew. But that is something easier said than done.

As long as the image of the PAP is tainted with years of oppression and screwed up policies and self-serving politicking, not to mention cronyism and being massively out of touch with the ground, change cannot happen quickly enough to stem more PAP electoral bloodshed.

 

[greenies]

I would have passed the said criteria except online behaviour. Would Alamaking aka Stompiss offer to lie and vouch for my cultured personality?

You might be the saint...

 

[scroobal]

Called Aunty again, listening no problem just no dance. Other entertainment spots ok. She then asked me "who is Dennis". I asked why and she said that many people asked her about Dennis. I told her that I will call in a week's time as I need to check.

Just curious on pre requisites :
- has never patronised St James Power Station
If I never patronised ST james b4 but other station does it qualify ?

- has never done the Hip Hop
I never done hip-hop but I listen to hip-hop is it ok ?

 

[Ash007]

Camping, looks like an interesting thread.

 

[bullfrog]

Called Aunty again, listening no problem just no dance. Other entertainment spots ok. She then asked me "who is Dennis". I asked why and she said that many people asked her about Dennis. I told her that I will call in a week's time as I need to check.

What about gangnam dance? Ok or not?

Is it can wear tudung but cannot wear mask?

 

[scroobal]

The Malay vote falls under the faction category and the Malays are looking for professionals and if its a female, Tudung is a must.

ps. any other dance is fine.

What about gangnam dance? Ok or not?

Is it can wear tudung but cannot wear mask?

 

[DuYunQi]

Is this for real??

Time to go check out who goes for such applications.

 

[scroobal]

All in all 2016 would be interesting. In 2011, 2 young ladies grabbed much of the GE attention and press coverage. Punggol BE saw a young lady grab the seat. Whether the PAP likes it or not, their Elitist approach has become an liability. They need to temper it significantly. Though not a young bird, Jeannette took surprisingly 41% of the votes from a new constituency that was carefully carved out. She came across as less elitist despite being a lawyer. Some how for various reasons the east of Singapore is more vulnerable than the rest of the country.

 

[OverTheCounter]

Some how for various reasons the east of Singapore is more vulnerable than the rest of the country.

The west is the industrial hub of Singapore, where jobs are visibly created. The east is where the night life is, where the way of life is more chaotic and less organized, where counter-trend ideas can flourish more easily. Low anchored himself in the east and it became synonymous with pro-opposition ground. That is why the east is more vulnerable than the west.

The centre is the hub of high finance and economic elitism. That is why PM Lee felt at home shedding those tears at Boat Quay, across the street where people make out at night and rake in the cash by day.