Scrumdidilyumptious DILFs

[LordElrond]

I am actually so intimidated by her, I dare not post anything in her threads. Scared kena hantam-ed to oblivion.

Why so scared? Just like it even if you need ZhiHau to translate for you

 

[ginfreely]

You are certainly an ungrateful gargoyle.

Instead of appreciating my munificence, in describing you as a bona fide virgin, in my piece in post #1, you have resorted to diabolical castigation and gender assassination.

Well, I guess I shouldn't expect much from a banal gargoyle, an offshoot of plebeian stemma.

As usual you @glockman clone like to act innocent and chaste after doing evil when you have always been insulting me a chicken in one way or the other like today disguised as headless chicken. And your writing is like shit with pompous words while good English literature book authors write in a simple classic way with interesting story line that can pull the heart strings of readers. Pui!

 

[glockman]

Why so scared? Just like it even if you need ZhiHau to translate for you

That's a good idea. Because I would hate to get hantam-ed and not aware that I kena hantam-ed because cheem words were used.

 

[ginfreely]

You think you are the only slut in the village? Your cheebye needs to be slapped.

Pui your evil filthy Malaysian village slut mother phua cb!

 

[ginfreely]

As usual you @glockman clone like to act innocent and chaste after doing evil when you have always been insulting me a chicken in one way or the other like today disguised as headless chicken. And your writing is like shit with pompous words while good English literature book authors write in a simple classic way with interesting story line that can pull the heart strings of readers. Pui!

And based on my English literature A1 reading skills I can tell you @Claire are a stupid evil fake woman because your description of the woman’s portion of the sexual shit that you are writing is very superficial and all from men’s angle.

 

[Claire]

Nein, don't be taken in by Wiki's. Masquerading as an alpha male
Err, more like getting into that fake sheath.

Ps: Intoxicated by your exuberance of your verbosity

It's fine by me. My work is done, my legal billing targets have been achieved for the month of July.

 

[Claire]

I am actually so intimidated by her, I dare not post anything in her threads. Scared kena hantam-ed to oblivion.

That's a good idea. Because I would hate to get hantam-ed and not aware that I kena hantam-ed because cheem words were used.

I am sure I am not that intimidating that you need to be overawed. I ain't the imperious sort. I don't even scowl at my subordinates or paralegals.

TBH, I do have a good impression of you.

However, I utterly detest that scrawny looking avatar of yours. It's disgusting for a man to look like that.

 

[blackmondy]

Sister Claire certainly has a way to counter naysayers of her sexual fantasies. Labeling detractors as losers might pierce the less than glorious pride in
many men's hearts but certainly not mine. Judging from the pattern, her occasional postings seemed to be seeking validation from phallic mere mortals here to support her self-justified lustful and philanderous ways. I admit I was once an admirer of hers but no longer as I'm simply cannot afford to have vociferous and excessively loquacious articles such as this decimating my remaining and surviving brain cells. I wish other sisters here would contribute their sexual escapades with more articulated and simpler words for easy digestion. She needs competition and I'm sure there are many competent abalone stories awaiting to be heard.
C'mon sisters. War is declared. So let there be one. The brothers here love more accessible juicy stories of the juicy, finer part of the female anatomy.

 

[wikiphile]

Sister Claire certainly has a way to counter naysayers of her sexual fantasies. Labeling detractors as losers might pierce the less than glorious pride in
many men's hearts but certainly not mine. Judging from the pattern, her occasional postings seemed to be seeking validation from phallic mere mortals here to support her self-justified lustful and philanderous ways. I admit I was once an admirer of hers but no longer as I'm simply cannot afford to have vociferous and excessively loquacious articles such as this decimating my remaining and surviving brain cells. I wish other sisters here would contribute their sexual escapades with more articulated and simpler words for easy digestion. She needs competition and I'm sure there are many competent abalone stories awaiting to be heard.
C'mon sisters. War is declared. So let there be one. The brothers here love more accessible juicy stories of the juicy, finer part of the female anatomy.

Truth be told, sister forum or NUSwhispers offer better sex stories for the buck. Im just here to troll.

 

[blackmondy]

I am actually so intimidated by her, I dare not post anything in her threads. Scared kena hantam-ed to oblivion.

Truth be told, sister forum or NUSwhispers offer better sex stories for the buck. Im just here to troll.

I just wonder her rationale of posting her escapades here instead of those forums you mentioned....
Or is it a case of "you can only be a winner in a place full of losers" ?

 

[Cottonmouth]

And based on my English literature A1 reading skills I can tell you @Claire are a stupid evil fake woman because your description of the woman’s portion of the sexual shit that you are writing is very superficial and all from men’s angle.

Show us a sample of sexual shit from the virgin's angle then.

 

[blackmondy]

Show us a sample of sexual shit from the virgin's angle then.

View from a hole is myopic in nature....damn hard to write stories one lah.
She dare say sister claire got kukujiao ? What a blasphemy ! She shall incur the wrath of the erotic fiction writer without mercy !

 

[kaninabuchaojibye]

I am a schmick, unlike a headless chicken, running all over the place in this forum, anathematising in every other thread, worrying about her putrescent virginity.

wahlao...damn jialat to describe an elderly virgin with this word leh.
have to search dicktionary for the real meaning and pronunciation
putrescent jibye

pu•tres•cent pyoo͞-trĕs′ənt​

►​

• adj.
  Becoming putrid; putrefying.
• adj.
  Of or relating to putrefaction.
• 
  Becoming or growing putrid, or fetidly rotten; in course of putrefying; tainted with putrefaction or decay: as, putrescent flesh.

 

[Cottonmouth]

View from a hole is myopic in nature....damn hard to write stories one lah.
She dare say sister claire got kukujiao ? What a blasphemy ! She shall incur the wrath of the erotic fiction writer without mercy !

A crass fake virgin with F9 English like her can only write vulgarities. Fuck her cB.

 

[blackmondy]

BTW where's Tracy Tan ? Damn, just her name alone arouses me liao....I think she's active on FB commenting on social issues.

 

[blackmondy]

A crass fake virgin with F9 English like her can only write vulgarities. Fuck her cB.

Absolutely fine with me. I love seeing women tearing each other's hair here, figuratively speaking. Sick and tired of the malicious masculinity mauling here. I want to see some ferocious femininity flogging action.

 

[Cottonmouth]

Absolutely fine with me. I love seeing women tearing each other's hair here, figuratively speaking. Sick and tired of the malicious masculinity mauling here. I want to see some ferocious femininity flogging action.

@ginfreely that loser can't do shit.
She's only good as a cum dump for indians.

 

[glockman]

I am sure I am not that intimidating that you need to be overawed. I ain't the imperious sort. I don't even scowl at my subordinates or paralegals.

TBH, I do have a good impression of you.

However, I utterly detest that scrawny looking avatar of yours. It's disgusting for a man to look like that.

OMG, you have a good impression of me?! That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me in a long while! I think I love you.

As for my photo, please forgive the way I look. I am trying my best to beef up and get a tan. My objective is to be a DILF before the year is up. *wink wink*

 

[glockman]

wahlao...damn jialat to describe an elderly virgin with this word leh.
have to search dicktionary for the real meaning and pronunciation
putrescent jibye

pu•tres•cent pyoo͞-trĕs′ənt​

►​

• adj.
  Becoming putrid; putrefying.
• adj.
  Of or relating to putrefaction.
• 
  Becoming or growing putrid, or fetidly rotten; in course of putrefying; tainted with putrefaction or decay: as, putrescent flesh.

I think our fair, pretty, intelligent and successful Claire has found the most elegant and sophisticated way to tell off the elderly virgin.

 

[bigcockman]

I love men, especially well toned DILFs.

He doesn't have to be a knight. A scrumdidilyumptious esquire DILF will do.

I am no Dolly Parton.

However, I ain't flat like Paris Hilton or Cameron Diaz.

I am a C Cup, well equipped with a sweet but confident disposition, and most importantly, a fabulous brain.

In any board room or multi client legal meetings, I float across the room. I am well aware that my hips swayed like a runway model, while walking to take my seat. I may be a few years to forty, but I know the way my Ferragamo dress melts into my manicured gym and yoga curves caused even the other women in the room to bristle. I can definitely feel the demon inside them stiffening up, with their fingers scrapping the bottom of their wretched souls, green-eyed, disturbed and in mental agony.

Alas, I pen this piece not about myself. It's about scrumdidilyumptious DILFs whom I have slept with, and those I crave to sleep with.

Am I a slut? Well so be it.

At least I know I ain't a cheap one.

I am a schmick, unlike a headless chicken, running all over the place in this forum, anathematising in every other thread, worrying about her putrescent virginity.

I love scrumdidilyumptious DILFs. I love their well built curves that are visible through their strained fabric at their forearms, biceps and chest. When they don their slim fit pants or skiny jeans, I admire those bulky calves and their protuberance of passion.

When a DILF is sprawled, naked on the bed, I love his innocence, his vulnerability and his silent face plea, begging me to mount on him, with both the base of my palms resting just beneath awesome chest, tweaking his nipples as I ride on him.

I love seeing the scrumdidilyumptious DILF holding out for as long as he could.

Seeing and sensing him on the edge of one, and pulling himself back in order to go for the longer haul, often makes me imagine the scrumdidilyumptious DILF as the chivalrous pastor or priest, treating me like a fair and lovely porcelain doll, needing his protection, guidance and comfort.

When the scrumdidilyumptious DILF finally "arrives", it's like watching his beautiful death.

I love that few brief seconds when the scrumdidilyumptious DILF transcends away from his performance of a pure, cum physical copulating act, when he whispers "I love you baby" into my ear.

I love his helplessness, shaking thighs, heavy breathing, chest rising, mental vacancy and most importantly, his complete detachment from his current spouse in entirety and in reality.

As I pen this piece to distract me from a boring Monday of endless drafting of corporate legal agreements, sipping my afternoon coffee, savouring my phallic looking chocolate eclair that my client had kindly grab-delivered over to me, I reminded myself that scrumdidilyumptious DILFs are indeed intoxicating.

Nevertheless I yearn for a DILF to hold me from behind, resting his chin on my bare shoulder, feeling his scruff on my neck, with his calloused hands all over me.

Well, enough of daydreaming. Its past 4pm. Time to finish off the last of my drafting and call it a day, working from a empty and deserted office.

Can a bigcockman like me who isn't married yet or become a father qualify as a DILF?