Redditer becomes a 小三, then left the affair, now write long story...

[Flibbertigibbet]

The show has a very long run. ​

Discussion


Several months ago I walked away from the man who treated loyalty like a seasonal hobby. The kind of man who could say “you’re different” to three women before lunch and still make it home in time to kiss his wife goodnight like the patron saint of domestic stability.

For a long time I believed I was the exception.

Apparently every woman in his orbit had been issued the same badge.

The funny thing about leaving a serial cheater is that the fog clears faster than you expect. At first you think you’ve escaped some intoxicating love story. In reality you’ve just stepped off a very crowded waitlist where everyone was told they were up next and the one.

Six months of distance turns whispers into patterns.

I used to think his past was a tragic coincidence that somehow I fit into differently. Now it feels more like a production line. Women arrive hopeful, confused, a little dazzled by his attention. Women leave slightly haunted, carrying a collection of unanswered questions like souvenirs from a twisted theme park no one can admit they went to

He had a talent for intimacy theatre. Late night confessions. “I’ve never told anyone this before.” Long messages about how he never felt more at peace than he was with me. The kind of emotional monologues that made me feel like id been handed the secret map to his soul.

Turns out the map had multiple copies in circulation.

I also used to believe his wife must be some tragic, clueless figure locked in a tower. But the longer I sit with it after meeting her and seeing their story and seeing her glow up post divorce the more I get that she had it harder than anyone. I try not to give myself too much credit bc it's still fucked up but I'm glad I faced it head on. To be honest I was probably still being a desperate pick me but ultimately that confrontation liberated the both of us

The real shock though is how ordinary he looks from the outside now. When you’re inside the story, he feels magnetic. Important. Like the sun around which everything spins. All these months later he’s just a man with a phone full of conversations he hopes never collide. I'm genuinely shocked he's still on autopilot, still lying and still cheating after losing so much ‍ he's admitted to both me and his ex w that he's struggling with this like he still believes we feel sorry for him. It's a genuine mental condition and I understand why therapists are apprehensive with serial cheaters due to the compulsion of lying. It's all built in wiring there's no decent baseline to "return" to or heal because that's simply how they are

Leaving didn’t feel like heartbreak in the end. It felt like walking out of a casino at 3am when the lights suddenly flick on

Since I left, three different women have subtly circled the same story. Different timelines. Same man. Same promises. Same dramatics only now he's the divorced dad rebuilding not the married man who's trapped

It would almost be impressive if it wasn’t so sad

The wild part is that I’m not even angry anymore. Time has a way of turning chaos into anthropology. Now it’s less heartbreak, more curious observation. Like watching the behavioural patterns of a very charming species that survives entirely on attention and emotional ambiguity.

So yeh the stage lights are still on in his little theatre. The script probably hasn’t changed. New audience members are taking their seats.

But I’m outside now, walking past the building with popcorn and a raised eyebrow, just thinking. Good luck, ladies. Initiallg I was tempted to reach out to warn people but I'm no match for his lying and I don't have the time to be stuck to him thinking I'm some sort of vigilante. I'm grateful for the respectful friendship I gained with his w and happy to see her doing well

I know a lot of people hope to go legit or are happy in their situations but for those who are trying to let go and feel they'll never get better or love again, you will. You will see things clearly so long as you're not afraid to look at the truth and you're brave enough to fully cut contact and let your nervous system recover/detox/reset... and remember to pour love into yourself even if it feels pointless in the beginning, keep going... one day you will simply look back and think wtf was I thinking lol

 

[rocket]

The show has a very long run. ​

Discussion


Several months ago I walked away from the man who treated loyalty like a seasonal hobby. The kind of man who could say “you’re different” to three women before lunch and still make it home in time to kiss his wife goodnight like the patron saint of domestic stability.

For a long time I believed I was the exception.

Apparently every woman in his orbit had been issued the same badge.

The funny thing about leaving a serial cheater is that the fog clears faster than you expect. At first you think you’ve escaped some intoxicating love story. In reality you’ve just stepped off a very crowded waitlist where everyone was told they were up next and the one.

Six months of distance turns whispers into patterns.

I used to think his past was a tragic coincidence that somehow I fit into differently. Now it feels more like a production line. Women arrive hopeful, confused, a little dazzled by his attention. Women leave slightly haunted, carrying a collection of unanswered questions like souvenirs from a twisted theme park no one can admit they went to

He had a talent for intimacy theatre. Late night confessions. “I’ve never told anyone this before.” Long messages about how he never felt more at peace than he was with me. The kind of emotional monologues that made me feel like id been handed the secret map to his soul.

Turns out the map had multiple copies in circulation.

I also used to believe his wife must be some tragic, clueless figure locked in a tower. But the longer I sit with it after meeting her and seeing their story and seeing her glow up post divorce the more I get that she had it harder than anyone. I try not to give myself too much credit bc it's still fucked up but I'm glad I faced it head on. To be honest I was probably still being a desperate pick me but ultimately that confrontation liberated the both of us

The real shock though is how ordinary he looks from the outside now. When you’re inside the story, he feels magnetic. Important. Like the sun around which everything spins. All these months later he’s just a man with a phone full of conversations he hopes never collide. I'm genuinely shocked he's still on autopilot, still lying and still cheating after losing so much ‍ he's admitted to both me and his ex w that he's struggling with this like he still believes we feel sorry for him. It's a genuine mental condition and I understand why therapists are apprehensive with serial cheaters due to the compulsion of lying. It's all built in wiring there's no decent baseline to "return" to or heal because that's simply how they are

Leaving didn’t feel like heartbreak in the end. It felt like walking out of a casino at 3am when the lights suddenly flick on

Since I left, three different women have subtly circled the same story. Different timelines. Same man. Same promises. Same dramatics only now he's the divorced dad rebuilding not the married man who's trapped

It would almost be impressive if it wasn’t so sad

The wild part is that I’m not even angry anymore. Time has a way of turning chaos into anthropology. Now it’s less heartbreak, more curious observation. Like watching the behavioural patterns of a very charming species that survives entirely on attention and emotional ambiguity.

So yeh the stage lights are still on in his little theatre. The script probably hasn’t changed. New audience members are taking their seats.

But I’m outside now, walking past the building with popcorn and a raised eyebrow, just thinking. Good luck, ladies. Initiallg I was tempted to reach out to warn people but I'm no match for his lying and I don't have the time to be stuck to him thinking I'm some sort of vigilante. I'm grateful for the respectful friendship I gained with his w and happy to see her doing well

I know a lot of people hope to go legit or are happy in their situations but for those who are trying to let go and feel they'll never get better or love again, you will. You will see things clearly so long as you're not afraid to look at the truth and you're brave enough to fully cut contact and let your nervous system recover/detox/reset... and remember to pour love into yourself even if it feels pointless in the beginning, keep going... one day you will simply look back and think wtf was I thinking lol

All these affairs. Be it 小三小四。
Man suffer the most. No willpower to keep your dick hidden. Die die want to show then sure have shit to handle. Because 1 time is never enough.
红颜祸水

 

[syed putra]

Convert and marry 4. No time wasting.

 

[Flibbertigibbet]

Convert and marry 4. No time wasting.

And become a bankrupt?