Let me share with you, that you are not alone. But I advanced too much for my age.
Maybe you should ask yourself what will be the benefits of the current projects at work. If you see them as wayang initiated by management, so that management can report that they are doing something, then I can relate to that. Whenever such project springs up from three legged wayangs, I felt very frustrated spending my time being busy over nothing.
Maybe, you should consider getting some young and worthy junior staff to be involved and develop them. It is fullfilling to develop people, impart knowledge and experiences, and see them improve and be happy. That may be a benefit and motivation to make a project a success. Give them OJT.
Don't talk about fame or reputation gained if the project is successful. In the end, all of us turn to white powder.
I was fortunate in my career in a big MNC, was at the decision making level at a relatively young age. Involved in the varied business segments and been to many places, and by virtue of the reputation of the MNC, was able to meet with ppl of varied levels, both dipomats and as well as commercial businessmen of various nations. Most of my time were spent travelling and then stationed overseas from this end to the other end.
Then on one fateful saturday in a certain foreign country; My collegue and I was just wandering aimlessly on the city streets. Both of us was trying to find some activities or food etc. to motivate ourselves, amuse ourselves, and keep us occupied. Then we realized there was none that interest us then. We had too much of everything and there was nothing that both of us was yearning for....we felt empty and aimless.
Too much sex, ktvs, abalone, exotic food etc. These are suppose to be part of the enjoyments that life has to offer. But yet, both of us find them bland....at that point in time....that feeling was scary when nothing can motivate you.
I realized that I was burnt out.... I went to the nine gourges to spend quite time with nature.
My mom died at hotspice many years ago. And the Foreign Burmese nurses were very dedicated and professional in taking care of the patients. Those were the real good talents, carefully selected. Their tender loving care brought a lot of consolation to the family members of the dying.
I began to appreciate the unsung professions that made more contributions to humanity then, endless meetings, big sound strategic plannings, egoistic and wayang arguments in meetings, office politics, people busy chunning out big sounding reports, and presentations in big board rooms. Office workers busy in their cubicles in the various stone cold nice looking office towers.
For myself, I have decided to teach the under privilage after I retire, maybe in nepal or in some no man's land where it matters most. Which I envision, will be fullfilling to my soul while enriching others.
In simple terms, bringing a smile and comfort to another person is an enriching experience. But be careful not to be suckered
Hope you don't mind the length of this reply and find something in my post useful to help you along.
I think some of the guys here are not saying that sex is the answer. Its just a phase that you go thru to come full circle, very much that the clubbing/disco phase everyone goes thru when they were much younger. One day you're gonna say to yourself "that's it" and you never go back to it again.
Yes I did bought a PSP and dumped it just after 3 days. I still wanna finish building that plastic model plane before my eyes failed me. However a mid life crisis is more than just realising that u are not getting younger anymore n many things which u may do when younger is not really applicable. Its a universal phenomenon that's really weird. Not everyone goes thru it but those that goes thru it all feel the same way, which is totally illogical. You can see it from the postings here and "American Beauty" was a box office hit because men worldwide could relate to that.
Farking strange man.........