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https://tw.news.yahoo.com/一層層剝開酒店小姐-我們會看到什麼?-010053730.html

一層層剝開酒店小姐 我們會看到什麼?

READr 讀+


26 人追蹤

2018年7月31日 上午9:00



READr 讀+授權Yahoo奇摩「誰殺了酒店小姐?」系列專題,不貼標籤,讓一群酒店小姐述說人生故事,她們為何走進這個世界?

7765cdd8c86582d8a3e320fe93787f2e

示意圖,非新聞當事人(圖片來源:Getty image)
一聽到「酒店小姐」,你心裡會浮現什麼樣的形象?
是被渣男推進火坑的無知少女,還是將男人玩弄於股掌間的婊子?
是家裡破產急著幫家人還債的失學少女,還是盲目拜金的瞎妹?
是終日以淚洗面的單親媽媽,還是夜夜笙歌縱慾過度的蕩婦?
先別急著回答,或許看完這個專題後,你會有不同的答案。

米兒為了幾萬塊的負債,休學踏入酒店。同學們形容她是個天生的 Bitch,所以她幹這行如魚得水,整天周旋於不同的男人間,把他們當工具人使喚。她笑著說,很喜歡和姐妹們團隊作戰,騙男人錢的感覺。米兒看來自在而快樂,信誓旦旦地說,遲早要出一本書,教姐妹們騙男人的技巧。
然而她卻經常談起老家那重男輕女,把一切精力都澆灌在弟弟身上的爸媽。國中時米兒被同學霸凌,媽媽說肯定是她自己不好,才會被那樣對待。高中時她失戀在房裡大哭,爸爸看了一句話都沒說,母親則要她安靜一點。從此之後米兒明白,自己不可能從家人身上得到什麼。然而我們卻無法從米兒的語氣中,嗅出對家人的怨懟。
在酒店兩年多,家人固定會收到米兒寄回的孝親費,卻以為她仍在唸書,半工半讀開了間設計工作室。「在他們面前,我演得很好⋯⋯(從事)酒店唯一讓我擔心的事,是失去在我爸媽面前搞笑的能力。」
唯獨談起那個家境小康,卻連兩千塊都不願借給自己救急的家人,我們才能從一派輕鬆的米兒身上,捕捉到少許的遺憾。
・・
L 有長久的精神病史,恐懼人群又容易焦慮,進酒店工作後還曾因不堪客人騷擾,出現嚴重的幻聽幻覺症狀。
她經常自殺。入行前她為了生活而接受人體實驗,錢卻被只會上網打筆戰的廢物男友花光,她一氣之下上吊。剛被好友騙入行時,她在酒店包廂被客人強暴,回家後把身邊所有藥吃光,不想再活。入行後她每天熬夜喝酒,脫衣幫男人打手槍,結果錢還是被同一個廢物男友花光,這次她選擇跳樓。
最初她很不適應酒店生活,因為客人們會將生活中的所有不如意,傾倒在她身上,然後進一步利用她們發洩性慾。作為接受一切負能量的載體,L 只能半推半就地吞下這些垃圾。
直到有一天,垃圾桶終於爆炸。L 開始反過來灌客人酒,反過來利用自己一切的不幸,對客人進行情緒勒索,反過來用自己的淚水和客人互相傷害。她學會因應不同客人扮演不同人格,用真真假假的騙術讓客人拜倒在她裙下;學會利用糟蹋男人的方式,讓他們對她莫可奈何卻又死心塌地。
她坦言,自己其實很享受這個糟蹋男人的過程,因為以結果而言,她的生活品質確實得到了提升。唯一的副作用,是太常扮演別人,她就無法當自己了。
矛盾的是,L 覺得自己很需要被別人需要,唯獨她不需要自己。
那麼,她想當的自己是什麼?
・・・
有些悲劇乍見時,荒唐地教人以為是鬧劇。
「我那時候大概需要七、八千元左右吧⋯⋯」問起入行理由,K 說了一個少得近乎可笑的金額,還有一個說服力低得像騙術的原因。
那年 K 剛休學,在接近身無分文又自身難保的狀態下,中途安置了一隻被棄養的病犬。後來狗的健康狀態急轉直下,需要一筆七、八千元的緊急治療費用,於是 K 選擇把自己送入容易快速賺錢的酒店,在為身邊貓狗負責的同時,也能順便養活自己。當時她說,母親的經濟狀況談不上好,拿個幾千塊都有點勉強,只能自力救濟。
第二次採訪時,我們到了 K 的宿舍,於是上述這個聽來荒唐的理由開始變得真實。她在小小的寢室中養了三隻貓和一隻烏龜,空氣裡全是貓的排遺氣味,完全嗅不出想像中一個酒店小姐的閨房會有的香氣。她還在陽台上養了兩隻路上撿到的傷鴿,門口養了一隻會叼著假陽具當玩具的狗,樓梯間和客廳裡,分別還有一隻渾身寄生蟲的鴿子、兩隻愛滋病兼腎衰竭的貓。那天她唯一的晚餐是便利商店的飯糰,戶頭裡只剩六百元。就像她撿來的生命一樣,她自己也是流浪動物。
K 在酒店中攢來的錢,不是花在小動物身上,就是拿去支持前男友的夢想。她其實並不是那麼能給予的人,只是她吝於留給自己。K 有嚴重的躁鬱症,酒店的工作和愛情中受到的背叛,讓她變得不相信人類又害怕孤單。和我們採訪到的其他幾位受訪者一樣,她也經常自殺,卻一次次被命運留下。她對世界給予了過多的愛,卻在被問到愛不愛自己時,說了不知道。
・・・・
夢工廠動畫人物史瑞克(Shrek)說,怪物就像洋蔥,是有層次的。是的,就像那些又有異味、又會讓人掉淚的洋蔥與怪物一樣,酒店小姐也有層次。
這個專題期待告訴讀者的,不是那種貼上各種不同標籤就搞定的酒店肥皂劇。我們嘗試述說一群有層次的酒店小姐的故事;關於她們如何在這個社會與產業環境下,有層次地成為小姐、有層次地滿足男人的需求;以及,她們如何有層次地成為自殺的高風險族群。
*自殺不能解決問題,勇敢求助不是弱者,只有活著才有機會解決問題。
再給自己和親人一次機會
自殺防治諮詢安心專線:0800-788995(24小時)
生命線協談專線:1995
張老師專線:1980
更多READr 讀+文章




https://tw.news.yahoo.com/低薪、失業、還學貸-爛牌人生推坑八大-010028978.html

低薪、失業、還學貸 爛牌人生推坑八大

READr 讀+


26 人追蹤

2018年7月31日 上午9:00



一聽到「酒店小姐」你會浮現什麼形象?調查發現47% 酒店小姐入行後變得憂鬱、51% 曾求助心理醫生、13% 至少自殺過一次,為什麼酒店小姐會成為自殺高風險族群?READr 讀+授權Yahoo奇摩「誰殺了酒店小姐?」系列專題,不貼標籤,讓一群酒店小姐述說人生故事,她們為何走進這個世界?


8f1dce09caf24652044af2772d51fb9e

(圖片來源:Getty image)
「為什麼幹這行?」
這幾乎是多數人初識酒店小姐時,第一個會想問的問題。在我們得到的問卷結果中,確實多數答案都毫不意外地與「快速賺錢」、「缺錢」有關。76.3% 受訪者入行與快速賺錢、存錢有關,12.7 % 受訪者則主動提及因負債入行。看起來,純粹就是為了錢。
然而,當我們進一步細讀受訪者的回答時,發現她們其實還傳達了錢以外的訊息。例如以下幾則:
「普通工作薪水少到付完房租就得吃土了,只有這個工作能維持『剛剛好有點質量』的生活,還能存錢,不需要像那些低薪企業還要你有幾年經驗……」-問卷編號 023
「缺急錢又不想借錢,加上白天的工作是薪水極低的自由業。」-問卷編號編號 014
「都是投入勞力與時間,不如挑戰一個能夠在最短時間刷出高額報酬的工作。」-問卷編號編號 005

此外,好幾位問卷填答者也提到,踏入酒店是因為找不到其他工作。
她們的回答其實反映了年輕族群因為缺乏人力資本,而容易面臨的失業、低薪問題。除此之外,20% 受訪者至今仍在償還學貸,而她們的年齡幾乎都只在 20 歲上下。在同齡族群普遍仰賴家庭提供教育、經濟奧援的狀態下,這代表的是她們家庭經濟狀況不佳,還是另有原因?
酒店陪侍工作不能跟性工作畫上等號,但長期針對性產業進行研究的中山大學社會系副教授陳美華認為,兩者有高度的相似性。陳美華指出,未成年者進入性產業,大部分是因為得不到家庭在經濟、精神上的支持。父母威權管教,或是親子關係疏離,會讓年輕族群更傾向尋求同儕支持與經濟獨立。
至於成年後才入行的性工作者,陳美華則認為她們多數是因為教育資本薄弱,導致經濟資本貧弱,而服務業勞動條件又太糟,加上就業市場中的性別不平等,造成女性容易進入賺錢快速、工時彈性的色情產業,此後也難以脫離。
換言之,「缺錢」、「急著賺錢」可能只是色情產業從業人員(性工作、酒店陪侍)入行的表層原因。深層的原因,可能是家庭、社會、人際網絡、出了問題,加上教育與經濟資本薄弱,以及就業市場中的就業不平等,才會讓這些條件不好的人「選擇」進入色情產業工作。
離家
我們在幾位受訪者身上,都看出她們或多或少因為和原生家庭的疏離,還有對夢想、同儕、愛情的追尋,以及就業市場中的性別歧視,因而選擇進酒店賺「快錢」。
小花為了能有更多藝術創作空間,拒絕父母干涉她的夢想,選擇進酒店賺學費、購買創作材料。她說:「經濟獨立後,可以減少跟家裡的衝突,他們也不會把經濟壓力轉移到我身上。」
拉拉L 因為交男友而被家庭切斷金援,此後她經濟獨立養男友,卻遺憾沒能完成大學學業,至今仍一邊持續酒店工作,一邊準備重考。
米兒來自重男輕女的家庭,父母將大部分資源挹注給弟弟,卻對她在情緒、經濟上的困境袖手旁觀,而她同時也因為對大學教育失望,轉而在酒店尋求成就感和自我修煉。米兒說:「在酒店這兩年雖然沒存什麼錢,但我為了讓家人不問我的事情,就都會寄錢回家。他們以為我一邊唸書,一邊開設計工作室,因為我在他們面前演很好。」
K 休學後身無分文,為了籌措幾千塊動物醫藥費,選擇進酒店賺錢;她不願向家裡拿,家裡也無力給。她說:「當時我已經有寵物美容師執照,但那時候寵物店老闆叫我穿低胸的衣服,說這樣客人比較多⋯⋯同樣都是要受到騷擾,但角色轉換加上隨之而來的高薪,反而覺得自己有被安撫到的感覺。」
小紫和父母關係淡薄,從小只是表演好孩子形象給爸媽看。她為了支持並理解姊姊而投入色情產業,同時也把從酒店、按摩院賺來的錢,拿來支持自己賺不了錢的設計、藝術創作、媒體工作,以及藝術研究所學費。她說:「一直以來我都在演戲,演好孩子和乖學生給爸媽看,但他們都不真的了解我的狀態。」
上述幾位受訪者的入行原因,確實都與錢有關,但都和肥皂劇與小說中,會設定的「負債幾百萬」、「家人生重病急需醫藥費」、「單親媽媽慘遭渣男推入火坑」等刻板印象有很大的區隔。
幾位受訪者入行時對金錢的需求,少至幾千,多則數萬,平心而論都不是什麼天大數目。如果父母、親友、同儕能夠救急,或是為她們提供心理、經濟上的穩定支持,她們入行的動機或許就隨之煙消雲散。
「我們應該停止將金錢需求視為色情產業從業人員,最深層,甚或是唯一的考量。」陳美華分析,這個社會真正該思考的問題是 - 為何這些女性在面臨人生難題時,找不到,或者不認為有可以求助的人,同時也不認為自己可以有更好的選擇?
「表面上看起來都是為了錢,要嘛有悲情的故事,要嘛就是另一個極端,被說成拜金,但其實癥結是性別化的勞動市場。就業市場中沒有提供女性好的選擇,即便現在有性平法(《性別工作平等法》),但女人能取得的工作還是不好,而且需要(比男性)相對漂亮的文憑。所以家庭能否提供好的物質基礎很關鍵,沒辦法的話,許多年輕人不想為了少少的錢被父母管教,就會選擇經濟獨立,這之後又很容易導致她人力資本薄弱,能選擇的工作又更受限。」到READr 讀+看完整文章



https://tw.news.yahoo.com/酒店小姐問卷調查-近5成有大專學歷-010056289.html


酒店小姐問卷調查 近5成有大專學歷

READr 讀+


26 人追蹤

2018年7月31日 上午9:00



一聽到「酒店小姐」你會浮現什麼形象?調查發現47% 酒店小姐入行後變得憂鬱、51% 曾求助心理醫生、13% 至少自殺過一次,為什麼酒店小姐會成為自殺高風險族群?READr 讀+授權Yahoo奇摩「誰殺了酒店小姐?」系列專題,不貼標籤,讓一群酒店小姐述說人生故事,她們為何走進這個世界?

0ae525e81e6a4ba89e548ad06b96c5f4

檢視相片
(圖片來源:Getty image)
為了能更廣泛、深入地暸解酒店小姐的工作狀態與產業環境,我們在徵詢從業人員意見後,製作了一份問卷,在 2018 年 4 月至 7 月間,發放給曾經、或此刻仍現役的酒店小姐們,最後得到 55 份有效問卷,嘗試初探酒店小姐們的群象。
我們發現,酒店小姐因職業所伴隨的心理負擔出乎意料。
47.2% 受訪者表示,入行後變得更容易憂鬱。
60% 受訪者表示容易覺得情緒疲累,工作以外時間討厭和人社交。
51% 受訪者曾經求助心理醫生。
21.7% 受訪者入行後曾動過輕生念頭。
12.7% 執行過至少一次自殺計畫。

這些數據讓我們發現,酒店工作背後可能有更多值得探究的問題。酒店小姐並不是只要陪客人喝酒唱歌,忍受一下「無傷大雅」的性騷擾,或是偶爾性交易「賺外快」,只要是女人「誰都可以做」的工作。
為了能更細緻地探究統計數據背後的深層原因,我們針對部分問卷填答者進行追蹤採訪,並訪問長期關注色情產業的學者、心理諮商師以及酒店經紀人,同時交叉比對我們的問卷統計數據,在《人生只剩一手爛牌》以及《愛情麥當勞》兩個章節中,進行更全面的討論。
在後續的章節中,我們將分別嘗試回答以下幾個問題:
一、什麼樣的女性容易成為酒店小姐?進酒店工作只是為了賺錢嗎?
二、酒店工作中的哪些結構因素,容易導致小姐的精神壓力無法排解?
三、以上兩個因素,是否與酒店小姐成為高自殺風險族群有關?是否還有其他原因?

在進行下一步討論前,我們推薦各位可以先閱讀以下的完整問卷分析結果。在快速、概括地掌握酒店小姐的狀態後,也更能在後續討論中,理解她們的狀態。
基本背景資料
本問卷填答期間為 2018 年 4 月 18 日至 7 月 1 日,受訪者人數共 55人,平均年齡 24.9 歲,最低 18 歲,最高 44 歲,平均年資 25 個月, 工作範圍涵蓋便服、禮服、制服、日式酒店等。受訪者以禮服店工作者最大宗,佔 50.9 %,另外日式酒店也佔 20%、便禮店佔 23.6%。49% 受訪者擁有大專學歷,5.4% 擁有研究所學歷。54.5 % 受訪者目前是全職酒店工作者,其中 76.3% 每週工作 3~4 天以上。
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酒店工作為小姐帶來的收穫
在性向認同上,僅有 58.1% 受訪者認為自己是異性戀,並有高達 34.5% 認為自己是雙性戀、5.4% 認為自己是戀物者、疑性戀、泛性戀;選答同性戀者僅 1.8%。
52.7% 受訪者擁有固定單一伴侶,另有 7.2% 擁有固定多重伴侶、3.6% 已婚。在這些擁有伴侶的受訪者中,有 76.4% 表示他們的伴侶詳細了解自己的工作狀態,14.7% 表示「大致知道但不清楚細節」。
43.6% 受訪者目前有養寵物,也有 21.8% 受訪者表示目前需要扶養雙親。雖然僅有 10.9% 受訪者目前有扶養子女,但無一例外的是,她們全部都處於單親扶養狀態。
在被問及「這份工作為您帶來的負面影響是什麼?」時,36.3% 受訪者主動提及身體健康問題,34.5% 主動提及情緒或精神壓力問題。此外,也有 7.2% 表示變得無法信任男人。7.2% 受訪者表示入行原因與「興趣」、「學習成長」有關。
月收入超過 10 萬的受訪者中,有 50% 受訪者認為在酒店業要能存活,最重要的條件是外貌、察言觀色與交際手腕,其他受訪者還提及情緒 / 危機管理,以及保護自己的能力。關於這部分問題,我們在《愛情麥當勞》的章節中,也會做更深入的討論。
小姐財務狀況
76.3% 受訪者入行與快速賺錢、存錢有關,僅有 12.7 % 受訪者主動提及因負債入行。然而,撇除房貸、車貸的話,43.8% 受訪者目前身上背負債務,其中又有 20% 受訪者仍在償還學貸。關於小姐入行原因,我們在《人生只剩一手爛牌》的章節中,也會進一步討論背後是否有更深層的因素。
25.4% 受訪者每月收入在 10 萬元以上,32.9% 每月收入不到 5 萬元。30.9% 受訪者認為酒店工作讓他們存了不少錢,但也有 16.3% 認為自己幾乎沒存到錢,5.4% 還越做越負債。
27.2% 受訪者沒有任何投資理財規劃,但也有 38.1% 受訪者有保險、定存規劃。
小姐對職場的感想
大約有 41.7% 受訪者認為她們的客人有超過一半是「奧客」。回答「奧客很少」或「沒有那種事,客人都很好」的受訪者也有 21.8%,但幾乎都是在日式酒店、日式酒吧工作的小姐。在被問及酒店業容易遇上的狀況時,40% 受訪者主動提及「性騷擾」。
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小姐在酒店中容易面臨的狀況
45.4% 受訪者因為這份工作而變得比較討厭男性,34.5% 比入行前更易怒。
736a0ffdb999c09f3895236cc6f01b68

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酒店工作為小姐帶來的負面影響
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窮得只剩一條命
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看這些話題的相關文章:


https://tw.news.yahoo.com/要會談戀愛、會談政治-酒店業高強度情緒勞動-010059875.html

要會談戀愛、會談政治 酒店業高強度情緒勞動

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26 人追蹤

2018年7月31日 上午9:00



一聽到「酒店小姐」你會浮現什麼形象?調查發現47% 酒店小姐入行後變得憂鬱、51% 曾求助心理醫生、13% 至少自殺過一次,為什麼酒店小姐會成為自殺高風險族群?READr 讀+授權Yahoo奇摩「誰殺了酒店小姐?」系列專題,不貼標籤,讓一群酒店小姐述說人生故事,她們為何走進這個世界?

82713535eafb6b1f633ae74c3adfc0a6

示意圖,非新聞當事人
「壓力型躁鬱症,因為要帶給客人歡樂,自己需要自控情緒,導致以前不會管理卻生病過……」-問卷編號 052
「……有時候必須卑躬屈膝、有時候說話要非常嚴謹,總之是個外表光鮮亮麗,心理上有極大壓迫的工作。而這裡正是以外表取人的地方,所以更多的憂鬱症狀從客人的數落開始……這裡的妹子應該需要心理醫生去排解那些不安、憤怒、難過。 」-問卷編號 023
「……長期累積的精神壓力使原本的躁鬱更嚴重。」-問卷編號 043
「情緒勞動過大,客人愛洗臉小姐讓自己質疑自己。」-問卷編號 050

根據我們的問卷調查,36% 受訪者認為,精神壓力、和「情緒勞動」是酒店工作對她們所造成的負面影響。除此之外,有 60% 受訪者覺得酒店工作造成她們情緒疲累,工作以外時間討厭和人社交。
什麼是情緒勞動?對服務業而言,情緒勞動是一個時時刻刻存在於工作,卻經常被忽略,或是輕視的問題。
無處不在的情緒勞動
美國社會學家 Arlie Hochschild 是最早針對服務業「情緒勞動」進行研究的學者。她認為,特定時空下的情感是有規則可循的,人會為了遵守規則而控制自己的情緒。她將這樣的努力稱為「情緒工作」,當這樣的工作是為了滿足職業要求時,則被稱為「情緒勞動」。
1983 年,Hochschild 針對「空姐」的情緒勞動進行研究。當時航空公司為了降低乘客搭飛機時的焦慮,會要求空姐不管面對什麼狀況,都必須「隨時保持真誠的微笑」。Hochschild 發現,許多真誠微笑的空姐,在下班後還是笑個不停,出現「情緒僵化」的狀況。只搬出「職業微笑」應付乘客,皮笑肉不笑的空姐,在上班前後則是個性截然不同的人,但她們會因為無法達到工作上的情緒要求而自責。然而還是有空姐覺得職業微笑理所當然,她們會清楚區分工作人格和真實人格,而且能隨時切換。
Hochschild 的研究結論是——情緒勞動會對勞動者造成性格、精神上的改變或壓力。人要嘛因為工作而失去自我,不然就是上班時偽裝自己,下班後卻覺得自責;而這是所有服務業都要面臨的狀況。
那麼只要認清「工作歸工作,生活歸生活」,成功找到切換模式的「開關」不就沒問題了嗎?
問題在於,不是所有人都能找到開關;有些工作甚至可能沒有開關。在酒店產業,或者我們稱之為「(性)陪侍產業」中,有太多不利的要素讓小姐的情緒沒有排解的出口。這些要素包含,她們普遍的家庭、社會資源匱乏、肉體與情緒勞動的高度連結、私人生活的消滅,還有整體社會對於女性角色的期待。
高度性化的情緒勞動
對許多女性來說,酒店小姐每天要承受的情緒勞動,或許和她們平常要經歷的事情差別不大;無論她們是空姐、護理師、專櫃服務人員、業務,都一樣得學會這些「手腕」來應對眼前的「顧客」,也得學會如何調解情緒來化解許多性惡意和騷擾。
和其他職業最大差別在於,同樣都是要透過情緒勞動討好、安撫顧客,酒店小姐必須同時滿足客人對「感情」與「女體」的期待,才能滿足工作上的要求。「靈肉分離」的傳說在酒店業中並不存在。
我們的問卷調查發現,在被問及「您認為要在這行存活,應該要具備哪些條件或能力?」時,雖然有 43.6% 受訪者主動提及外貌,但卻有高達 83.6% 主動提及「察言觀色」、「危機處理」、「交際手腕」、「情緒管理」等能力。這些被泛稱為「手腕」的情緒勞動技巧,被小姐們視為酒店陪侍業最核心的技能。
然而只靠「手腕」是無法在酒店業存活的。曾在酒店服務三年的彩虹指出,衡量一個酒店小姐能否在業界存活,必須由「尺度」、「本錢」與「手腕」三個面向來看,而這三者被業界統稱為「素質」。
「手腕」就是「經營關係」的技巧。小姐為了讓客人持續把錢花在自己身上,必須設法維持雙方氣氛融洽,除了察言觀色、危機處理之外,通常也包含賣弄性感、營造戀愛氣氛等一切能讓客人愛上自己的方式。
「本錢」通常指涉身材、三圍和顏值。本錢越好,能夠選擇的店家就越多。這裡所謂的本錢,不只是天生的相貌,還牽涉到小姐利用衣著、妝髮,甚至手術的改變,去迎合酒店業對主流審美觀的要求,與美學勞動息息相關。此外,小姐的學經歷背景、專長、特技,有時也被視為本錢的一環。
「尺度」就是一個小姐打算開放自己的身體界線到什麼程度;直白地說,就是脫不脫、能不能摸、給不給摳、要不要弄。酒店陪侍工作名義上是「賣笑」產業,但小姐的身體就是商品的一環,每個人在入行時,就必須決定可以「賣肉」到什麼程度。為了求生存拼業績,小姐的尺度通常會和和她有多少本錢、手腕有關。
彩虹指出:「普遍的潛規則是,小姐的本錢好,尺度就可以小一點。若是本錢不夠,就必須靠手腕和尺度來補足競爭條件。若是手腕很好,本錢就不是絕對的重要,尺度也可以不用很大。」
手腕、本錢和尺度可以截長補短,但關鍵是缺一不可。尺度再大卻沒有本錢和手腕,很可能只能在業界底層打滾;空有本錢卻缺乏尺度與手腕,很難留住客人。手腕高明卻沒有任何本錢和尺度,守備範圍會非常狹小。
這種「缺一不可」的特性,正是酒店陪侍與其他服務業有所區別的關鍵。酒店陪侍是一種「和性有關,卻不必然只有性」的服務業。本錢和尺度,都涉及小姐對身體的管理和經營,本質上就是為了成為客人慾求的對象,不只和「性」息息相關,也脫離不了社會對「性別」的想像。而手腕則涉及小姐如何管理和客人在身體上的互動。彩虹將酒店小姐的情緒勞動,稱為「高度性化的情緒勞動」。
高速攻防的近身搏鬥
酒店情緒勞動的主戰場是小姐與客人短兵相接的包廂。彩虹將小姐與客人互動的過程,稱為「高強度且高密度的近身搏鬥」,因為其中的情緒勞動不僅辛苦,而且轉換速度也非常快,小姐必須找方式調適。「舉例來說,我今天做一個戀愛客,一開始卿卿我我還負擔得了,但他開始毛手毛腳,開始性邀約了,妳也要跟著轉。妳不要的話,就要演其他角色,但妳又不能脫掉前面的劇本,頂多從女朋友變成紅粉知己,但角色差異和狀態不能太大。」
彩虹以過去經歷為例:
「我有坐過某個年輕社運、政治人物的爸爸,他一開始跟我聊年輕人很辛苦沒機會,後來很羞赧問我說知不知道他兒子和綠黨,說不知道兒子在搞什麼,我就要說兒子很好。之後他開始摸我,我又必須切換成一個陪他玩樂的女人,要讓他有慾望。從一開始我就知道人家不會跟我談兒子兩小時,我會擔心什麼時候要切換。」
問題在於,客人與小姐的身份本來就不對等。絕大部分情況下,客人都擁有發球權,小姐只能被動接球,而且不能漏球;客人就無所謂了,漏接沒關係,還可以隨時中斷關係。有些小姐在投入角色扮演時,突然對情緒被強制中斷,會產生失落感。例如受訪者小花就說:
「有時候上班坐檯就像是和客人談戀愛,客人會叫我不要做了,去跟他結婚之類的。但時間到了,我就被帶到另外一桌,剛剛的事就像沒發生一樣。這工作不會給妳情緒緩衝時間,要很快就進入另一段甜蜜關係,所以不能把客人一時講的話,當成是真的。坐檯時數被切掉的時候會有點失落,我還自以為談戀愛談得正高興,然後瞬間被打醒。
另一種情況,則是小姐預期客人想和她談嚴肅的課題,卻冷不防在下一瞬間,又被打回性的載體。受訪者 K 就回憶道:「有一次印象很深刻,是一個老先生來,一碰面就問我對土地和國族的認同是什麼,我知道他是支持台灣獨立的,可以跟他好好聊,結果他前一句講完土地認同,下一個動作就是掐我奶,這件事讓我超級失落。」
酒店經紀人筠筠則直言:「酒店就是愛情麥當勞,販賣的是速食愛情⋯⋯情緒來得快去得也快,小姐不能自己被愛情沖昏頭,也要有辦法快速調節情緒。」
除了模擬愛情,小姐也必須因應不同客人需求,強迫自己投入各種不熟悉,甚至是討厭的角色,入戲太深的話很可能精神受創。
支持台獨的L ,就曾在工作時坐過中華統一促進黨員的檯。她為了讓客人喜愛她,所以在大家激動落淚,合唱《龍的傳人》時,自己也入戲太深跟著掉眼淚。客人對她的表現滿意極了,緊握著她的手說「要堅強!要勇敢!」時,她的內心卻充滿抗拒。L 說,那天回家後,她把臉埋進枕頭裡嘶吼,因為這個角色扮演太衝突了。
「後來那群統促黨的客人很喜歡我,說以後把我算進固定班底,再之後連他們朋友都會點我,這錢賺得超崩潰。我扮演一個角色,多數是拿過往人生一部分記憶出來,但統促黨那個,我完全沒有那些成分,就是得要想像出來,所以很衝突。」到READr 讀+看完整文章
*自殺不能解決問題,勇敢求助不是弱者,只有活著才有機會解決問題。
再給自己和親人一次機會
自殺防治諮詢安心專線:0800-788995(24小時)
生命線協談專線:1995
張老師專線:1980
更多READr 讀+文章
娃娃機夾什麼
窮得只剩一條命
 

democracy my butt

Alfrescian
Loyal
Translated:
Https://tw.news.yahoo.com/Layering the hotel layer by layer - what do we see? -010053730.html

Stripping the hotel lady layer by layer What do we see?

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26 people tracking

July 31, 2018, 9:00 am



READr Read + Authorize Yahoo Qimo "Who killed the hotel lady?" series of topics, not tagged, let a group of hotel ladies tell the story of life, why did they enter the world?



Schematic, non-news parties (Source: Getty image)
What kind of image will you see when you hear "Miss Hotel"?
Is it an ignorant girl who is pushed by a scum man to push a fire pit, or is it a man who plays with a man in the palm of his hand?
Is it a school girl who is in bankruptcy and eager to help his family pay their debts, or is it a blind sister?
Is it a single mother who tears her face all day long, or is she screaming in the night?
Don't rush to answer, maybe after reading this topic, you will have different answers.

In order to tens of thousands of debts, Mier entered the hotel. Classmates described her as a born Bitch, so she was doing this themselves, and mixing in the day between different men, who handle them as tools. She smiled and said that she likes to fight against the sisters' team and lie to the man's money. Mier looked at it and was happy, and vowed to say that sooner or later, a book will be published to teach the sisters the skills of deceiving men.
However, she often talks about the patriarchal patriarch of her hometown and the parents who put all their energy on her brother. In the middle of the country, Mier was bullied by her classmates. Her mother said that she must be treated badly. When she was in high school, she fell in love and cried in the room. Dad didn't say a word, and the mother asked her to be quiet. Since then, Mier understands that he can't get anything from his family. However, we are unable to sniff out the resentment against our family from the tone of Mier.
In the hotel for more than two years, the family will receive the filial piety fee returned by Mier, but she thought she was still studying, and she opened the design studio. "In front of them, I played very well." The only thing that worried me about the hotel was the loss of the ability to be funny in front of my parents."
Only when I talked about the well-off family, but even the two thousand families who are not willing to lend themselves to the emergency, we can capture a little regret from a relaxed Mier.
・・
L has a long history of mental illness, and the feared people are also anxious. After entering the hotel, they have experienced serious illusory hallucinations due to unbearable harassment.
She often commits suicide. Before entering the line, she accepted the human body experiment for life, but the money was spent by the waste boyfriend who only used the Internet to fight the pen, and she hanged herself. When she was just cheated by her friend, she was raped by the guests in the hotel box. After going home, she ate all the medicines around her and didn't want to live any more. After entering the line, she stayed up late every night to drink, undressing and helping men to pistol, and the money was still spent by the same waste boyfriend, this time she chose to jump off the building.
At first she was not very comfortable with the hotel life, because the guests would dump all the unsatisfactory things in life on her and then use them to vent their sexual desire. As a carrier of all negative energy, L can only swallow the garbage in half a push.
Until one day, the trash can finally exploded. L began to in turn the guests, and in turn used all their misfortunes to emotionally extort the guests, which in turn hurts each other with their own tears and guests. She learns to play different personalities in response to different guests, using real and false tricks to let the guests fall under her skirt; learn to use the way of ruining men, let them be ruined by her.
She admits that she actually enjoys the process of ruining men, because in terms of results, her quality of life has indeed improved. The only side effect is that she often plays other people and she can't be herself.
Paradoxically, L feels that she needs to be needed by others, but she does not need herself.
So, what is she who wants to be herself?
・・・
When some tragedies are glimpsed, they are ridiculously taught to be farce.
"I probably need about seven or eight thousand yuan at that time." Asked about the reason for the entry, K said a small amount that is almost ridiculous, and a reason why the persuasive power is as low as deception.
That year, K just dropped out of school, and in the state of being close to being penniless and unable to protect himself, a abandoned dog was placed midway. Later, the dog's health status went down quickly, and he needed an emergency treatment fee of seven or eight thousand yuan. Therefore, K chose to send himself to a hotel that is easy to make money quickly. While being responsible for the cats and dogs around, he can also support himself by the way. At that time, she said that the mother's economic situation could not be said to be good. Taking a few thousand pieces was a bit reluctant and she could only help herself.
In the second interview, we went to K's dormitory, so the above-mentioned ridiculous reason began to become real. She raised three cats and a tortoise in the small bedroom. The air was full of cat's scent. She couldn't smell the aroma of a hotel lady's boudoir. She also raised two injured pigeons on the balcony. At the door, she raised a dog that would only wear a dildo toy. In the stairwell and the living room, there was a pigeon with parasites and two AIDS. A cat with kidney failure. The only dinner she had that day was a rice ball at the convenience store, with only $600 left in the account. Like her life, she is also a stray animal.
K The money that comes in the hotel is not spent on small animals, but is the dream of supporting the ex-boyfriend. She is actually not the kind of person she can give, but she is left to herself. K has severe bipolar disorder, and the betrayal of the hotel's work and love has made her become unbelievable and afraid of being alone. Like the other interviewees we interviewed, she often committed suicide, but she was left behind by fate. She gave too much love to the world, but when she was asked if she loves herself, she doesn't know.
・・・・
DreamWorks animated character Shrek said that monsters are like onions and are hierarchical. Yes, like the onions and monsters that have odors and tears, the hotel lady also has layers.
This topic is expected to tell the readers, not the kind of hotel soap operas that are fixed by various labels. We try to tell the story of a group of hierarchical hotel ladies; how they can become a lady in a hierarchical and hierarchical manner to meet the needs of men in this social and industrial environment; and how they can become suicide high-risk groups hierarchically. .
* Suicide can't solve the problem. Being brave and asking for help is not a weak one. Only when you are alive can you have a chance to solve the problem.
Give yourself and your loved one a chance
Suicide prevention consultation peace of mind line: 0800-788995 (24 hours)
Lifeline Association Line: 1995
Teacher Zhang special line: 1980
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https://tw.news.yahoo.com/Low-pay, unemployed, and student-lost-bad bad life push the big eight-010028978.html

Low salary, unemployment, and schooling

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July 31, 2018, 9:00 am



What kind of image will you see when you hear "Miss Hotel"? The survey found that 47% of hotel ladies became depressed after entering the hospital, 51% had sought help from a psychiatrist, and 13% had committed suicide at least once. Why did Miss Hotel become a high-risk group for suicide? READr Read + Authorize Yahoo Qimo "Who killed the hotel lady?" series of topics, not tagged, let a group of hotel ladies tell the story of life, why did they enter the world?




(Source: Getty image)
"Why do you do this?"
This is almost the first question that most people would like to ask when they first met the hotel lady. In the results of the questionnaire we got, it is true that most of the answers are undoubtedly related to "quick money" and "lack of money". 76.3% of the respondents were involved in making money quickly and saving money, and 12.7% of the respondents took the initiative to mention the indebtedness. It seems that it is purely for money.
However, when we further read the respondents' answers, they found that they actually conveyed messages other than money. For example, the following:
"Ordinary job pay is less than paying the rent. You have to eat the soil. Only this job can maintain a "just a little quality" life, and you can save money. You don't need to have years of experience like low-paying companies... - Questionnaire number 023
"The lack of money and the need to borrow money, plus the daytime work is a free industry with very low salaries." - Questionnaire number 014
"It's all about investing in labor and time. It's better to challenge a job that can pay high rewards in the shortest time." - Questionnaire number 005
In addition, several respondents to the questionnaire also mentioned that they entered the hotel because they could not find other jobs.
Their answers actually reflect the problem of unemployment and low wages that young people are likely to face because of the lack of human capital. In addition, 20% of respondents are still repaying their studies, and their age is almost only 20 years old. Under the condition that the same age group generally relies on the family to provide education and economic aid, does this mean that their family's economic situation is not good, or is there another reason?
Hotel escort work can not be equated with sex work, but Chen Meihua, an associate professor of the Department of Social Sciences at Sun Yat-Sen University, who has been researching the industry for a long time, believes that there is a high degree of similarity between the two. Chen Meihua pointed out that the majority of minors entering the sex industry are due to the lack of economic and spiritual support from the family. Parental autonomy and discipline, or parent-child relationship alienation, will make young people more inclined to seek peer support and economic independence.
As for sex workers who entered the adulthood, Chen Meihua believes that most of them are due to weak education capital, resulting in poor economic capital, and the labor conditions in the service industry are too bad. In addition, gender inequality in the job market makes women easy to enter and make money. The fast, flexible working sex industry has not been able to break away since then.
In other words, "lack of money" and "eager to make money" may be the surface of the sex industry (sex work, hotel escort). The deeper reasons may be family, society, interpersonal network, problems, weak education and economic capital, and employment inequality in the job market, so that those with bad conditions will choose to enter the sex industry. .
Leave home
We have seen in several interviewees that they are more or less alienated from their native families, as well as their pursuit of dreams, peers, love, and gender discrimination in the job market. money".
In order to have more artistic creation space, Xiaohua refused to interfere with her dreams and chose to enter the hotel to earn tuition and purchase creative materials. She said: "After economic independence, you can reduce conflicts with your family. They will not transfer economic pressure to me."
Lala L was cut off from her family because she was married to her boyfriend. Since then, she has independently raised her boyfriend in the economy, but she regrets that she has not completed her university studies. She is still working on the hotel and preparing for re-examination.
Mier comes from a patriarchal family. Her parents pay most of their resources to her younger brother, but she stands by her emotional and economic difficulties. She is also disappointed in college education and seeks a sense of accomplishment and self-cultivation in the hotel. . Mier said: "There was no money in the hotel for the past two years, but I would send money to go home so that my family would not ask me. They thought that while I was studying, I opened the design studio because I was in front of them. It’s very good."
After leaving school, K was penniless. In order to raise thousands of animal medical expenses, she chose to enter the hotel to make money. She did not want to take it at home, and her family could not afford it. She said: "At the time, I already had a pet groomer license, but at that time the pet shop owner told me to wear low-cut clothes, saying that more guests are also harassed, but the role conversion plus the ensuing I feel that I have a feeling of being comforted."
Xiao Zi and her parents have a weak relationship. I have only shown the image of a good child to my parents. She invested in the porn industry in order to support and understand her, and also used the money she earned from hotels and massage parlors to support her own design, artistic creation, media work, and art research fees. She said: "I have been acting all the time, playing good kids and deaf students to see my parents, but they don't really understand my status."
The reasons for the above-mentioned interviewees are indeed related to money, but they are all set in the soap operas and novels, "the debt is millions of dollars", "the family is seriously ill, the medical expenses are urgently needed", and the single mother is squandered by the scum. Stereotypes such as "fire pits" are very different.
Several respondents had a demand for money when they entered the business, as few as a few thousand and as many as tens of thousands. In all fairness, it is not a big number. If parents, relatives, and colleagues can help, or provide them with psychological and economic stability support, their motivation to enter the market may disappear.
"We should stop thinking about money needs as the most in-depth, or even the only consideration for practitioners in the porn industry." Chen Meihua analyzed that the real question for this society is - why these women can't find it in the face of life's problems, or Don't think that there are people who can ask for help, and don't think they can have better choices?
"On the surface, it seems to be for money. If there is a tragic story, it is the other extreme. It is said to be a gold worship, but in fact it is a gender-based labor market. There is no good choice for women in the job market, even There is now a sexuality law (the Gender Work Equality Act), but the work that women can get is still not good, and they need a relatively beautiful diploma (more than men). So whether the family can provide a good material basis is crucial, no way. Many young people don't want to be disciplined by their parents for a small amount of money. They will choose economic independence. After that, it is easy for her to have weak human capital and more limited choices." Read the READr + see the full article



https://tw.news.yahoo.com/Miss Hotel Questionnaire - Nearly 50% have a college degree -010056289.html


Hotel Miss Questionnaire Survey Nearly 50% have college degree

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26 people tracking

July 31, 2018, 9:00 am



What kind of image will you see when you hear "Miss Hotel"? The survey found that 47% of hotel ladies became depressed after entering the hospital, 51% had sought help from a psychiatrist, and 13% had committed suicide at least once. Why did Miss Hotel become a high-risk group for suicide? READr Read + Authorize Yahoo Qimo "Who killed the hotel lady?" series of topics, not tagged, let a group of hotel ladies tell the story of life, why did they enter the world?



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(Source: Getty image)
In order to understand the working status and industrial environment of Miss Hotel more extensively and in-depth, we consulted the practitioners and produced a questionnaire, which was distributed to the hotel that was or was still active from April to July 2018. Miss, I finally got 55 valid questionnaires and tried to explore the group of hotel ladies.
We found that the hotel hotel’s psychological burden associated with her career was unexpected.
47.2% of respondents said they became more susceptible to depression after entering the market.
60% of respondents said they were prone to feeling tired and hated and socialized outside of work.
51% of respondents have turned to psychologists.
21.7% of the respondents had a suicidal thought after entering the bank.
12.
 

Hypocrite-The

Alfrescian
Loyal
Not surprisingly....heaps of pros in Ozland are from taiwan. Can start importing them to Geylang cat 150 category. Their economy has been going down for some time. Tat why they say being ah tiong land is bettee
 
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