<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width="100%" border=0><TBODY><TR></TR>
<!-- headline one : start --><TR>Why one mum is stopping at one
</TR><!-- headline one : end --><!-- show image if available --></TBODY></TABLE>
<!-- START OF : div id="storytext"--><!-- more than 4 paragraphs -->I refer to last Friday's article by Ms Chua Mui Hoong, 'Raising baby? Money talks'.
I am a mother of a three- year-old girl. I am very happy to have a child, but I have made it a choice to stop at one. Statistically, I will be labelled as one of those people who drag down Singapore's birth rate.
Having a child, as Ms Chua has partly pointed out, is more than just a financial consideration. It goes deeper at the societal and educational level.
Singaporeans who have been brought up in the 1970s to 1990s are a driven, go-getting lot.
Before then, we had large extended families and mothers who stayed home to bring up the children while the fathers were the breadwinners.
The women who grew up in the 1970s-90s, especially those who have worked hard in school and at work and have become successful, are not content with the nurturing and mothering roles they are traditionally expected to take on.
I have gone through and witnessed how much focus is placed on performance at work.
Carrots, promotions, pay rises and preferential treatment are given to the performing individual - not to a mother who chooses to exercise her maternity leave or childcare benefits, to stay at home to nurture her brood.
Yes, it all boils down to priorities and choices in life. But has the Government really considered the opportunity costs a woman has traded for the time spent on giving birth and nurturing just one child?
The nine months of physical discomfort is nothing compared to the lifetime needed to tend to her child's physical and emotional needs as he grows up. Multiply that by three or four, if that is the number we need to replace our population.
I shudder at the cold and practical way the Government is promoting marriage, and even the suggestion of bringing back matchmakers.
Getting married and having children are decisions that are too important to be made based purely on the incentives thrown at us.
What will make more Singaporeans consider having a larger family is a review of the social expectations of the people. Is our society right for bringing up children? Do we have the right environment and do couples have the right disposition to be parents?
We should not be having children as a form of national service.
Instead, what we need are a country, workplace and family system that are supportive and understanding of the pressures mothers face in juggling work and family, and a more creative school system where children are not just brought up to excel and covet awards. Elizabeth Yee (Mrs)
<!-- headline one : start --><TR>Why one mum is stopping at one
</TR><!-- headline one : end --><!-- show image if available --></TBODY></TABLE>
<!-- START OF : div id="storytext"--><!-- more than 4 paragraphs -->I refer to last Friday's article by Ms Chua Mui Hoong, 'Raising baby? Money talks'.
I am a mother of a three- year-old girl. I am very happy to have a child, but I have made it a choice to stop at one. Statistically, I will be labelled as one of those people who drag down Singapore's birth rate.
Having a child, as Ms Chua has partly pointed out, is more than just a financial consideration. It goes deeper at the societal and educational level.
Singaporeans who have been brought up in the 1970s to 1990s are a driven, go-getting lot.
Before then, we had large extended families and mothers who stayed home to bring up the children while the fathers were the breadwinners.
The women who grew up in the 1970s-90s, especially those who have worked hard in school and at work and have become successful, are not content with the nurturing and mothering roles they are traditionally expected to take on.
I have gone through and witnessed how much focus is placed on performance at work.
Carrots, promotions, pay rises and preferential treatment are given to the performing individual - not to a mother who chooses to exercise her maternity leave or childcare benefits, to stay at home to nurture her brood.
Yes, it all boils down to priorities and choices in life. But has the Government really considered the opportunity costs a woman has traded for the time spent on giving birth and nurturing just one child?
The nine months of physical discomfort is nothing compared to the lifetime needed to tend to her child's physical and emotional needs as he grows up. Multiply that by three or four, if that is the number we need to replace our population.
I shudder at the cold and practical way the Government is promoting marriage, and even the suggestion of bringing back matchmakers.
Getting married and having children are decisions that are too important to be made based purely on the incentives thrown at us.
What will make more Singaporeans consider having a larger family is a review of the social expectations of the people. Is our society right for bringing up children? Do we have the right environment and do couples have the right disposition to be parents?
We should not be having children as a form of national service.
Instead, what we need are a country, workplace and family system that are supportive and understanding of the pressures mothers face in juggling work and family, and a more creative school system where children are not just brought up to excel and covet awards. Elizabeth Yee (Mrs)
