When I was a child, if I were punished in school, my mum would punish me again at home. Back then, the teachers are always right. Nowadays, the students can do no wrong? Are parent getting over-protective over discipline at school? Are parents threatening to undermine school discipline?
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This case happened 2-3 years ago. A student was punished by her principal publicly to "Stand at the corner." Although the mum does not know the reason why the principal punished her daughter, she was furious because she felt her daughter has "lost face". This parent, together with her daughter visited their MP's meet the people session requesting the MP, Dr Lee Bee Wah, to write a letter of complaint against the principal to MOE.
After speaking separately with the mum and the student, Dr Lee Bee Wah did not write the letter for this parent, instead she offered to inform the principal of the request & advice the parent to find out from the principal why her daughter was punished.
Related Story from TODAY:
Teachers feel more heat from parents
A vocal minority of mums and dads are threatening to undermine school discipline
Jun 08, 2012
Singapore - An upper primary student had hit another boy and broken the school rules, which led teachers to hint of possible disciplinary consequences, including caning, as spelt out in the school's handbook.
The next day, the student's mother called the school and threatened to go to the police if her son was caned.
The school has yet to decide on the boy's punishment.
A student in another school, meanwhile, refused to take part in a sports activity with his peers, even though his teacher encouraged him to do so.
The boy's mother then warned the teacher against telling her child what to do.
While such parental behaviour is considered in the "minority" and the "extreme", these anecdotes reflect growing concern among most educators TODAY spoke to - parents becoming increasingly vocal and demanding in recent years, adding to the emotional stresses on teachers.
Parents want to have a say in a range of matters, such as classroom management and teaching methods, and some have confronted teachers or threatened to go to the media, educators said. Parents, meanwhile, said they just want the best for their children's education.
More help for teachers
Education Minister Heng Swee Keat said the ministry will stand by teachers who do the appropriate things, including maintaining discipline, and urged parents to give teachers their support.
Adding that cases of unreasonable parents are the minority, he told TODAY during a recent interview: "At the front line, teachers have a very difficult task of managing parents. We will have to equip our teachers to handle more vocal parents.
"But at the same time, as a matter of policy, we must also stand by our teachers … who seek to maintain discipline, teachers who seek to do the right things for the child."
Mr Heng said it will otherwise affect standards of discipline and learning in the schools, and would create a sense of unfairness among parents if demands are dealt with differently.
He added: "When the school imposes discipline ... the objective is not to punish (the child) per se - rather, it is to help the child learn from the lesson and to help other children learn from what is right and what is wrong."
While schools adopt various platforms like meet-the-parent sessions and email to keep communication open, every complaint by a parent will be investigated thoroughly. If found to be at fault, the teacher will be taken to task and a formal apology will be issued, educators said.
They added that parents are mostly reasonable and provide constructive feedback that has helped to improve school's processes. Some educators, however, are worried over a mollycoddling environment, where parents are over-protective of their children.
A senior teacher in a primary school, who spoke on condition of anonymity, said: "The fear of what parents may do makes the teacher err on the side of caution and some teachers will then rather be lax on the discipline."
Learning to pull together
Parents have become more vocal as they feel "a lot of pressure about their children's education, or more accurately, their ability to survive or better still thrive in the system", said sociologist Tan Ern Ser.
"We are also becoming more of a consumerist society in which parents and their children see themselves are clients or customers, while teachers and schools are service providers," said Dr Tan, who also noted that many parents have equal or even higher credentials than teachers, and are inclined to tell teachers where they are deemed to be not doing things right.
A parent who wanted to be known as Ms Lye, who has two school-going children, felt parents "are not asking the school to account for every single detail of daily school life".
"But as parents, we will be concerned for our children," she said.
Dr Tan called on parents and schools to collaborate closer, or it may result in "demoralised, jaded teachers who may unintentionally pass their negative vibes to students".
He added: "This could lead to a downward spiral, in which the victim is the child."
The Education Minister felt students, parents and teachers all have to play a part in upholding regard for the teaching fraternity.
And even if teaching in classrooms is no longer a didactic approach, but one where interactivity is encouraged, it is important to maintain the respect in the classrooms.
Said Mr Heng: "You'll find that in the best schools around the world, if you do not show respect and regard for the person who is teaching you, it will be very difficult for (the child) to learn … It is not just teachers but it is also teaching our children basic respect to other people."
