In step

Psalm 15:1-5 The Kind of Christian God Wants Me to Be​

Psalm 15:1-5 The Kind of Christian God Wants Me to Be is a sermon based on a previous simple thought devotional post I wrote.

The book of Psalms also contains at least one such list of ten things that summarize good behaviour (Psalm 15:2–5). This is the main subject of the ten commandments themselves. In that sense, they are not technically laws at all, for they contain no mention of penalties for those who break them. Rather, they are a kind of policy statement—a bill of rights—showing how relationships between God and humankind were to be viewed within the Old Testament faith community. It is widely agreed by scholars that this list must have originated at a very early period in Israel’s history, and some claim it can be traced back to Moses himself.1

THE QUESTION: What kind of Christian does God want me to be?​

The psalm asks the question: What kind of person can hang out with God? What type of person does God consider a friend?

“Lord, who can dwell in Your tent? Who can live on Your holy mountain?” (Psalm 15:1, HCSB)

THE ANSWER: God wants me to be a caring Christian​

God wants to be with the kind of friend is someone who knows what it really means to care for others. There are the ten commandments, but isn’t that enough? The fact is that the commandments point to a way of living that can only be accomplished with a relationship with God. God reveals to us how to live life here on Earth. The kind of person that God wants to be with is someone who is willing to share these characteristics with other people. God wants me to be a caring person.

What are the characteristics of a caring person? Jesus described caring – which is the supreme intent of the Mosaic Law – as loving God and loving one another (Matthew 22:37-40).

“He said to him, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and most important command. The second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets depend on these two commands.”” (Matthew 22:37–40, HCSB)

This psalm lays out a variety of ways in which a person can show that they care, that they love God and love one another.

The fact that there are 10 descriptions of one who qualifies to abide with the Lord (sincere, righteous, honest, without slander, without doing wrong, without reproaching, distinguishes between good and evil, keeps his oath, does not take interest, does not accept bribes) suggests a comparison with the Ten Commandments (though the two lists do not correspond in every item). Obedience to God’s revealed will is the requirement for full participation in the sanctuary.2

TEN CHARACTERISTICS OF A CARING CHRISTIAN3​

Although there is a comparison to the Ten Commandments found in the books of Moses, I want to view these “commandments” as “areas” where we can reveal God’s righteousness in our lives. The big idea with this list is that our worship and life in God are grounded more in ethical behavior than in liturgical correctness.4

We can list these ten commandments in three different categories based on our actions: (1) the way one walks or relates, (2) the way one speaks, and (3) the way one does or acts.ersonal – “walks”

“The one who lives honestly, practices righteousness, and acknowledges the truth in his heart —” (Psalm 15:2, HCSB)

The first set of three qualities is personal They relate to how I walk with others. God is a God of truth and trustworthiness. The opposite of which is sin. There is a question given at the beginning of the psalm:

“Lord, who can dwell in Your tent? Who can live on Your holy mountain?” (Psalm 15:1, HCSB)

God’s answer begins first with the way one walks or relates with others. These three characteristics of a caring person are related to one’s spiritual walk.

1. Lives honestly (Psalm 15:2)
2. Practices righteousness (Psalm 15:2)
3. Is truthful (Psalm 15:2)

A Christian can only be as honest, righteous, and truthful as their relationship to God. If God is truth, and we are His children, then God expects us to take on His characteristics. We should be honest, truthful, and right in the way we relate with one another. My righteousness is based not on own works, but on my relationship with God. I can only live as honest as my relationship with God. Otherwise, I am not living truthfully. My public life must match my spiritual life. My talk must match my walk. This leads me to the second set of characteristics.

Verbal – “speaks”​

“who does not slander with his tongue, who does not harm his friend or discredit his neighbor,” (Psalm 15:3, HCSB)

1. Does not slander (Psalm 15:3)
2. Does not harm others (Psalm 15:3)
3. Does not discredit the neighbors (Psalm 15:3)

Relational – “does”​

The final set of characteristics come in two forms. The first form in how I live out my faith with others. This speaks of my moral integrity. Do I believe God and His Word? Do I live it out? Am I consistent in my walk with Him?

“who despises the one rejected by the Lord but honors those who fear the Lord, who keeps his word whatever the cost,” (Psalm 15:4, HCSB)

1. Hates the same people whom God has rejected (Psalm 15:4)

8. Honors those who respect God (Psalm 15:4)

USING MONEY AND LOVING PEOPLE​

The second form is in my finances. The way I spend my money and how I relate with others concerning money matters to God. Do I want to have a proper relationship with God? Then it matters how I deal with money.

“who does not lend his money at interest or take a bribe against the innocent — the one who does these things will never be moved.” (Psalm 15:5, HCSB)

The first way I deal with money asks the question: “Am I generous?” If I lend money, do I try to make a profit from others? Or will I allow God to use my money for His glory. There are people who I can help. I can either help or hurt someone with my money. The other is about taking a bribe against innocent people. In essence, will I cheat them by charging them interest? Or will I cheat someone by paying someone else to hurt other people? Will I use my money to hurt others? Will I allow God to use my money to help others?

1. Doesn’t rob or take advantage of people (Psalm 15:5)

In verse 5 the injunctions of the Jewish law forbade a merchant to take interest on the loans he made to his fellow countrymen (see Exodus 22:25, Deuteronomy 23:19, Leviticus 25:36). Interest rates in the ancient world were extremely high, often from 20 to 50 percent.5

1. Doesn’t cheat people out of their money (Psalm 15:5)

Money can be used to hurt people. The reason is because our love for people gets misplaced. Instead of placing our love with people, we place with money. The New Testament states that:

“For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, and by craving it, some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pains.” (1 Timothy 6:10, HCSB)

We run the danger of being greedy instead of generous. The Bible teaches here that we need to show our love by the way we use our money.

Verse 5 ends with a postscript. The one who lives righteously “shall never be moved.” He is the one who dwells in God’s presence.
In summary, David’s concern here is with the totality of life determined by the character of God. This includes right speech with our neighbor and integrity in legal and financial matters. Oaths are to stand. Money is to honor God. The innocent are to be protected. We see these standards fulfilled in Christ, and then fulfilled in us who abide in Him and walk “not … according to the flesh but according to the Spirit” (Rom. 8:4). Jesus is the One in whom there is no sin (1 Pet. 2:22). He is the One who manifests the righteousness of God, first, for us and, second, in us (2 Pet. 2:24).

The world and a worldly church care nothing for righteousness. David’s question about who can dwell in God’s tabernacle on Mount Zion, however, still stands and has pressing relevance for us today. This question and the answers which follow are a prescription for life—abundant now and eternal forever in Christ (John 10:10; 11:25).6

These ten characteristics show the kind of caring love and empathy that someone should have who plans to be a friend of God.

Psalm 15 invites us to consider the profound questions, “Lord, who may dwell in your sacred tent? Who may live on your holy mountain?” (15:1). People will respond to these questions in different ways. Some might say the answer depends on church membership or attendance. Others might say the answer depends on how much money a person donates to the Lord’s work.

Although there are many possible answers to these questions, Jesus has made it clear that there is only one appropriate response: “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6). And Jesus said that many will be surprised on the day of judgment. He instructs, “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it” (Matthew 7:13–14). There is only one way to the Father, and that is through belief in Jesus (John 3:16). And we should be aware that believing in Jesus is underwritten by an ethical style of life that authenticates our faith.7

1 John William Drane, Introducing the Old Testament, Completely rev. and updated. (Oxford: Lion Publishing plc, 2000), 289.

2 Allen P. Ross, “Psalms,” in The Bible Knowledge Commentary: An Exposition of the Scriptures, ed. J. F. Walvoord and R. B. Zuck, vol. 1 (Wheaton, IL: Victor Books, 1985), 803.

3 Jim Erwin, “Psalm 15:1-5,” Lectionary Reflections Year B (2014-2015), Logos Bible Software Notes, 27 August 2015, found at http://www.patheos.com/blogs/jimerwin/2015/08/27/ten-characteristics-caring-person/, accessed on 12 April 2016.

4 C. Hassell Bullock, Psalms 1–72, ed. Mark L. Strauss and John H. Walton, vol. 1, Teach the Text Commentary Series (Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books, 2015), 104.

5 Russell H. Dilday Jr. and J. Hardee Kennedy, “Psalms,” in The Teacher’s Bible Commentary, ed. H. Franklin Paschall and Herschel H. Hobbs (Nashville: Broadman and Holman Publishers, 1972), 299.

6 Donald Williams and Lloyd J. Ogilvie, Psalms 1–72, vol. 13, The Preacher’s Commentary Series (Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson Inc, 1986), 128.

7 C. Hassell Bullock, Psalms 1–72, ed. Mark L. Strauss and John H. Walton, vol. 1, Teach the Text Commentary Series (Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books, 2015), 109.

I’ve Told You What to Do​

“I don’t know what to do!” Jenna cried for the 10th time in between her sobs. She sat surrounded in the kitchen by spilled milk. Such a mess! What, oh what, was she to do? If only she knew!

“Wipe it up with the rag right there,” her mother’s voice called out yet again.

“But then I don’t know what to do!” Jenna cried.

“I’ve told you what to do. Wipe it up with the rag.”

“But then I don’t know what to do!” Jenna sobbed yet again.

“I’ve already told you what to do, Dear. You don’t need to know all the other details yet. I’ll guide you step by step. But start with what I’ve already told you.”

“He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” Micah 6:8 (ESV)

“…For this is the will of God, your sanctification:” 1 Thessalonians 4:3 (ESV)

Thoughts On Marriage​

I have been writing a weekly blog for almost eleven years now. Over that time, I’ve written several posts on marriage—but never on what might be the most significant issue in marriage.


Let me begin with a humorous story.

Back in 2013, the prominent author and journalist David Brooks delivered the baccalaureate address at the University of the South, which happens to be my alma mater. He began by telling the graduates what not to worry about as they entered the world. Then he said, “Now I’m going to tell you what you should be worrying about.” He continued:

“The first thing to worry about: Will I marry well? This is the most important decision you’re going to make in your life. If you have a great marriage and a crappy career, you will be happy. If you have a great career and a crappy marriage, you will be unhappy. I tell university presidents that since the marriage decision is so central, they should have academic departments on how to marry. They should teach the neuroscience of marriage, the sociology of marriage, the psychology of marriage. Everybody should get a degree in how to marry.”

Brooks then remarks, “Of course, no college president has taken my advice.”


Now to the most significant issue, to which very few people give much consideration when they are entering a marriage.

One of the biggest mistakes we make is believing that our spouse is supposed to be the source of our happiness. This is how many Americans approach marriage: I’m looking to you to make me happy. I’m looking to you to complete my life. But in doing so, we are looking to our spouse to provide something that only God can. Our spouse cannot be God—because we were created with a soul that thirsts for Him.

As wonderful as a spouse may be, as strong and fulfilling as a marriage may become, it cannot satisfy the deepest longing of the human soul.

Consider what David writes in Psalm 42:1:

“As the deer pants for the water brooks, so my soul thirsts for God.”

And in Psalm 63:1:

“My soul thirsts for You in a dry and weary land.”

You may remember when Jesus encounters the Samaritan woman at the well. She clearly was looking for a man to make her happy, to fulfill her life, because it says she’d been married five times and she was currently living with a man. Yet Jesus doesn’t condemn her. Instead, He gently points her to Himself. He recognizes the spiritual emptiness in her life and offers her living water. He says only that living water which He offers will satisfy that thirst in her soul. No man will ever be able to do that.

Subjective Experiences with Peace​

subjective peace is questionable
I totally understand the Old Testament concept of peace, transliterated shalom. It is the entire basis for community in the Hebrew Bible. Shalom is a shared peace, not necessarily subjective at all. It is the peace that we have between God and man, but also the peace that we have between man and man. Shalom includes the ideas of wellness and wholeness, not just of individuals, but also of the community. Shalom is used as a common greeting. In many ways, it is the glue that holds a community together. It is our peace with God moreso than my peace with God. So it is not really subjective.



I have offered a brief explanation of shalom, knowing full well my limitations. Nonetheless, I think I have the basic idea. Once I understood shalom, I even had a little bias against subjective peace.

The last few days have removed the bias against subjective peace. I have experienced an inexplicable peace visiting me over and over again, day after day.

I have left these notes on X where I track my own particular moments and movements.

You can follow me on X @JaredIngle2022

Day 1​

Today I sat in a calm, still, silence. I simply sat in God’s Presence and He sat with me. I read from John. I journaled. I remained in the silence. I do not know what to ask for today but I do know the peaceful silence is the answer at times.

Day 2​

And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4.7


I’m thankful for the peace of God today that has permeated my apartment. I’m at work getting ready to clock in and the peace of Jesus is still here.

Day 3​

Depart from evil, and do good;
seek peace, and pursue it.
Psalm 34.14, NRSV

For the 2nd day in a row, God has visited me with peace in my quiet time before work. It is nothing short of a visitation. Today, this Scripture came to mind.

Day 4​

‘Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.
Matthew 5.9, NRSV

I’m sensing the peace of God in a different way today. It is active. I’ve been part of a couple conversations that made room for the peace of God. I followed the Lord’s leading.

Day 5​

Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.
John 14.27, KJV

I’m sitting in the break room before work. I have a lot I could be afraid of. I’m making some changes… but peace

Day 6​

Oh that you had paid attention to my commandments!
Then your peace would have been like a river,
and your righteousness like the waves of the sea;
Isaiah 48.18, ESV

“When peace like a river attended my way…”

The words from “It Is Well” came back to me last night.

Day 7​

“For you shall go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and the hills before you
shall break forth into singing,
and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands.
Isaiah 55.12, ESV

Peace for what I’m going to do floods my thoughts today!

is peace subjective for you?​

With no one else around, in the stillness of your own time, do you have peace?

It’s been a long time since I felt peace for such a long time. I know that God is making Himself very real to me in this season. There have even been people at work that comment about the calmness that they see in me.

What do others see in you?

Perhaps you are like me and see peace through the lens of the Hebrew phenomenon called shalom. Perhaps peace is a community peace and you leave little room for subjective experience. Maybe you have done like I have and even argued that the New Testament Church would understand peace in terms of shalom rather than the way we understand peace today.

But does shalom mean that peace cannot be subjective as well?

Newton: The Blade – How Grace enters the Human Heart​

I hope you have been enjoying our series of Modern English versions of Newton’s timeless pastoral letters. The former slave-trader turned pastor has so much more to offer us than simply the most well loved hymn in the history of the English language.



In the last installment Newton dissected the inner evidence for salvation. The next three letters expand on Christian experience by looking at three phases of faith in our hearts. For many of us we are a bit remote from the way crops grow. But the Bible is full of agricultural images. Who would have thought that watching Clarkson’s Farm might help us understand the Bible?

After a long winter of worry and no signs of life on the farm, hope springs in the farmer’s heart when they see those first few blades of wheat as they break through the soil. Looking little different from grass, they nonetheless have just as much life in them as even the fully ripened ear of corn. Join Newton as he expertly explains how this age-old image relates to the way faith grows in our hearts.

“The earth produces the crops on its own. First a leaf blade pushes through, then the heads of wheat are formed, and finally the grain ripens” (Mark 4:28, NLT).​

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Dear Friend,


You asked me to explain how God’s work of grace progressively grows in a believer’s life. I will identify three phases, based on how Jesus compares this to the growth of wheat and other grains: the blade, the heads of wheat, and finally the ripened grain.

The Lord draws all Christians effectively to save them by bringing them to know the same essential truths. But He works in wonderfully varied ways so I will set aside, as much as possible, the individual’s experiences. I will discuss instead only those experiences which are to a greater or lesser degree common to everyone. My purpose is not to tell my own story but to outline what the Bible teaches us about the pattern of a work of grace, so that this letter will apply to all who are truly born of God.

From Death to Life​

By nature, you were “dead because of your disobedience and your many sins” (Ephesians 2:1, NLT). We were not only strangers to God, but we were His enemies and we were opposed to His will and His grace. However moral our character or however educated we may have appeared, none of us were able to receive or accept God’s truth:

“People who aren’t spiritual can’t receive these truths from God’s Spirit. It all sounds foolish to them and they can’t understand it, for only those who are spiritual can understand what the Spirit means” (1 Corinthians 2:14, NLT).

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Therefore the Lord Jesus declared, “For no one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them to me, and at the last day I will raise them up.” (John 6:44, NLT). Though the term Father usually refers to God the Father, I think that perhaps Jesus sometimes uses it to represent God in distinction to his human nature. Another example of this might be when Jesus says “Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father!” (John 14:9, NLT). I think then that Jesus is saying, “No one can come to me unless he is taught by God and divine power works in them.” The actual working of this power is credited not to the Father but to the Holy Spirit:

“It is best for you that I go away, because if I don’t, the Advocate won’t come. If I do go away, then I will send him to you. And when he comes, he will convict the world of its sin, and of God’s righteousness, and of the coming judgment. The world’s sin is that it refuses to believe in me. Righteousness is available because I go to the Father, and you will see me no more. Judgment will come because the ruler of this world has already been judged” (John 16:7-11, NLT).

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And yet this power is indeed the power of God himself and it is therefore attributed to God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit:

“Just as the Father gives life to those he raises from the dead, so the Son gives life to anyone he wants” (John 5:21, NLT).

 “For no one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them to me, and at the last day I will raise them up” (John 6:44, NLT).

“The Spirit alone gives eternal life. Human effort accomplishes nothing. And the very words I have spoken to you are spirit and life.” (John 6:63, NLT).

“But whenever someone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. For the Lord is the Spirit, and wherever the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord—who is the Spirit—makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image” (2 Corinthians 3:16-18, NLT).

“May the Lord lead your hearts into a full understanding and expression of the love of God and the patient endurance that comes from Christ” (2 Thessalonians 3:5, NLT)

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Conviction is not Enough​

Today we are looking at the experience of a person at the beginning of this divine work, which will always lead them to Jesus for life and salvation. The work is instantaneous. Light is given to the soul, which it had never known before. The eyes of the mind are opened and revelation is given. At first, this light is faint like the first light of dawn, and yet once it has begun it will surely spread to the brightness of full day.

We often speak as if conviction of sin were the first work God performs in a soul He intends to draw to Himself. But that is not quite right. Conviction is only a part, or rather an effect of that first work. In fact some strong conviction does not arise from this act of saving grace at all. Such false conviction is temporary and external, stirred by fear or emotion, although it may trouble a person for a while and move them to many outward efforts.


For genuine conviction of sin, we must first have a real perception of God. Without this sin may indeed be feared as dangerous, but not hated as evil. Sin’s real cost can only be understood when it is contrasted with who it is committed against: God in all his holiness, majesty, goodness, and truth.

No outward means of grace, no mercies, judgments, or religious rituals, can produce this discovery of God. It can only come by divine light and power working in the soul.

The natural conscience and human emotions may be stirred for a time by outward events, creating a kind of moral anxiety, even resolutions to change. Yet unless this is grounded in a spiritual grasp of God’s perfection as revealed in His Word, sooner or later it will come to nothing. The person who was once affected in this way may drift back to their former ways:

“They are worse off at the end than they were at the beginning.  It would have been better for them not to have known the way of righteousness, than to have known it and then to turn their backs on the sacred command that was passed on to them. Of them the proverbs are true: ‘A dog returns to its vomit,’ and, ‘A sow that is washed returns to her wallowing in the m&d’” (2 Peter 2:20-22, NIV).

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Such a person may instead sink into a self-righteous form of religion, “they will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly” (2 Timothy 3:5, NLT).

They may be outwardly respectable but inwardly powerless, just like the Pharisee who “stood by himself and prayed this prayer: ‘I thank you, God, that I am not like other people—cheaters, sinners, adulterers” (Luke 18:11, NLT).

Because the message of the Gospel can appeal strongly to human emotion, it is sadly no surprise that many people seem to respond and even claim to be Christians at first, but later fall away. The seed might spring up and look green for a while. But if there is no depth in the heart for it to take root, it will surely wither away.

“The seed on the rocky soil represents those who hear the message and immediately receive it with joy. But since they don’t have deep roots, they don’t last long. They fall away as soon as they have problems or are persecuted for believing God’s word.” (Mark 4:16-17, NLT).

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The Signs of True Faith​

We may be unable to determine, when someone first claims they have faith, whether the work in them is truly deep and spiritual. But “the Lord knows those who are his” (2 Timothy 2:19, NLT); and wherever His work is genuine, it is an infallible sign of salvation.

Since God reveals Himself only through the truth of the Bible, the light that first awakens the soul naturally leads it back to the Word from which that light has sprung. Soon all the great truths of the Bible begin to be seen and believed. The evil of sin is recognised, the evil of the heart is felt.

At first, the person may make efforts to win God’s approval by prayer, repentance, or moral reform. But typically these are seen to be vain and ineffective, like the woman who had suffered for many years and spent all she had on physicians “but had gotten no better” (Mark 5:26, NLT). The soul grows weary of all human efforts to please God and begins to see the need for the Gospel and that God alone is able to save us.

At this point, a person may be very close to becoming a Christian in this sense: they believe God’s Word, see and feel things to be as the Bible describes them, they hate and avoid sin because they know it displeases God and opposes his goodness. They receive the testimony God has given concerning His Son. Their heart is moved and drawn toward Jesus by glimpses of His glory and His love for sinners.

They trust in Christ’s name and promises as their only encouragement to approach the Throne of Grace. They diligently use the means God has appointed to impart grace and cause it to grow. They love God’s people, agreeing with the psalmist, “How excellent are the LORD‘s faithful people! My greatest pleasure is to be with them” (Psalm 16:3, GNB). They are longing, waiting, and praying for a share of the blessings true Christians enjoy, and can be satisfied with nothing less.

Such a person is convinced that Jesus has the power to save them. But through remaining ignorance and legalism, their memory of past sin and the awareness of their own inner sinful nature, they often doubt whether Jesus is willing. Because they do not yet grasp the abundance of grace and the security of God’s promises, they fear that the compassionate Saviour might reject him and turn him away from His feet.

At this stage, someone who is young in knowing the Gospel remains burdened with sin and may be buffeted by Satan’s temptations. But the Lord, “will feed his flock like a shepherd. He will carry the lambs in his arms, holding them close to his heart (Isaiah 40:1, NLT).


Jesus will at times revive them with moments of deep comfort, so they won’t be swallowed up in sorrow. These moments might include the heart being caught up in prayer, or deeply moved by a sermon, or a specific promise might be brought home to the mind and applied with great power and sweetness. They may mistake the nature and purpose of such comforts, which are not intended to be relied on, but rather to encourage them to press forward. They think that they must be safe because of such comforts and fondly hopes to remain in the same state forever.

Because of such comforts someone can feel that their mountain stands strong. But before long, there is a change. The comforts are withdrawn. They no longer find the motivation to pray. They can’t focus when listening to sermons. Indwelling sin revives with new strength, and Satan returns with more anger. Now they are at their wits’ end, believing their hope was presumption, and their comforts were delusions. They want to feel something that will give them a reason to trust in the free promises of Christ Jesus.

At this stage, the person’s view of the Redeemer’s grace is still very narrow. They do not yet see the full harmony and glory of God’s attributes in the salvation of a sinner. They sigh for mercy but fear that justice stands against them. Yet through all these changing experiences, the Lord is gently training them and leading them onward.

They receive grace from Jesus that enables them to fight against sin. Their conscience is tender, and their main troubles are spiritual. They think “if I could only gain a firm and lasting sense of my acceptance in the Beloved, hardly any external trial would be able to greatly disturb me.”

But despite the weakness of their faith and the lingering power of a legalistic spirit, which greatly hurts them, there are aspects of their current experience that they may look back on with regret later. When their hope and knowledge are more established, they may miss the sensitivity of their heart eagerly longing for the means of grace, desiring God’s Word with earnestness and eagerness.

“Like newborn babies, you must crave pure spiritual milk so that you will grow into a full experience of salvation. Cry out for this nourishment, now that you have had a taste of the Lord’s kindness” (1 Peter 2:2, NLT).

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At this early stage they count the hours from one opportunity to hear God’s Word to the next. Eagerness and attention is written on their faces when listening. Their zeal is strong, though perhaps, for lack of experience, sometimes too impulsive or intense. They love souls and care deeply for the glory of God. This can sometimes get them into trouble, and may be mixed with pride, but its root is sincere and commendable. This is similar to when Simon Peter “drew a sword and slashed off the right ear of Malchus” (John 18:10).


The grace of God influences both the understanding and the heart’s deepest desires or affections. Warm feelings without knowledge cannot rise any higher than superstition. But knowledge which does not influence the heart and its deepest longings only creates a hypocrite. The true believer is blessed with both. Yet this early stage is often more remarkable for the warmth and a burning heart. On the other hand, as God’s work advances, although the heart is not left out, it seems to be carried on mainly in the understanding.

The mature Christian has a solid, refined, and broad view of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the glories of his person and his saving love. Hope is more established, dependence more simple, and all other things being equal, peace and strength will be more stable and enduring than in a young convert. But typically the new Christian will have more heartfelt fervency.

A tree is most valuable when it is heavy with ripe fruit, but has a special beauty when it is covered in blossom. At the beginning of our spiritual journey, it is like springtime. We are in bloom, and by the grace and blessing of the Gardener we will bear fruit in old age. Our faith may be weak, but our hearts are warm.

At this stage, someone may rarely dare to think of themselves as a Christian, yet they see, feel, and do things which no one could, unless God was with them. The soul’s deepest desire is towards God and the Word of His grace. Knowledge is still small but is growing every day. They may not yet be a father in the faith, or even a young man, but they are surely a dear child.

“I am writing to you, dear children,
because your sins have been forgiven on account of his name.
 I am writing to you, fathers,
because you know him who is from the beginning.
I am writing to you, young men,
because you have overcome the evil one.

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I write to you, dear children,
because you know the Father.
I write to you, fathers,
because you know him who is from the beginning.
I write to you, young men,
because you are strong,
and the word of God lives in you,
and you have overcome the evil one” (1 John 2:12-14, NIV).

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Even at this early stage, the Lord has visited the heart, freed it from the love of sin, and fixed its desires supremely upon Jesus Christ. The spirit of fear and bondage is slowly leaving, and the longed-for hour of liberty is drawing near. A clearer discovery of the glorious Gospel will enable us to know we are accepted and to rest fully on the Lord’s finished salvation. When that time comes, we could be described as having developed the “head of wheat.” We will look at that stage in another letter.

Yours in Christ,

John Newton

Falling in Love Can be Easy but Staying in Love is Real Work​

Bailey, 36, and Kevin, 40, sat on my couch for their couples counseling session and shared their disappointment about their bickering and falling out of love.


Bailey put it like this, “Kevin works long hours and when we do see each other, we argue a lot. I just don’t feel loved by him anymore and feel sad about it.”


Kevin responds, “I’m at the end of my rope with Bailey’s criticism and negative evaluations about our relationship. We’ve only been married three years but have not even started talking about having kids because we argue so much.”

We’ve all been there: after meeting someone new, we’re in the thrall of excitement and possibility, our day to day thoughts consumed by the possibility of the blossoming relationship. But after the glow of the honeymoon period has waned, many couples find it difficult to nurture and communicate their feelings for each other.

It’s natural to believe that the fact that the intensity and infatuation have diminished is a sure sign that you’re falling out of love, or no longer in love. But the trap of overreacting to evolving relationship dynamics is problematic. It’s possible to renew your fondness for each other with a conscious approach to maintaining the love as the foundation of your partnership.

In a new article on Psychology Today’s website, Dr. Lisa Firestone explores the ways in which expressing love in ways that are well received by your spouse can help cement a relationship. Dr. Firestone draws on research and real world experience to support her understanding that “love can feel like a natural state we either experience or don’t, [but] we have much more say in it than we may think.”

Dr. Firestone points out that “the more we express love, the more we ignite it in our partner and cultivate it in ourselves.” But the ways in which we express love go a long way toward making our partner feel that love, and keeping the passion in a relationship alive.

Being aware of how we show love and how we want to receive love in return are at the heart of Dr. Firestone’s philosophy. She notes that “it’s common and fairly instinctual to give love how we would feel it.”

For some people, that means showering their partner with cards and gifts, expressing lots of affection, and frequently saying ‘I love you.’ For others, love is something more low-key, a quiet appreciation of the other person wherein you give them space to do their own thing.” Indeed, we all express and experience love differently, and Dr. Firestone provides a roadmap for encouraging a conscious approach in a partnership.

Dr. Firestone breaks it down into five tenets, each of which contributes to a healthier and happier expression and acceptance of love. First, she counsels couples to listen to what their partner is saying, writing that “paying attention to what our partner says sounds like the most obvious advice we’ll ever hear, but it’s something we have to remind ourselves to keep doing. Make a mental note of when they mention something that matters to them or something that excites them.”


Next, when listening to our partner, we should “pay attention to how they express their feelings.” Distinct from the concept of simply listening, the key concept here is that realize that “in addition to hearing what they vocalize, we should always try to notice what lights our partner up” because “this awareness helps us truly know our partners and understand the things that make them feel seen and loved.”

Dr. Firestone further advises that people “check in with your partner (and yourself).” She puts it simply, observing that “none of us are mind readers, and we can’t be expected to intuit what another person wants and needs at all times. It’s more than okay to ask questions and encourage our partners to let us know where they’re at and what they need from us.”

This practice naturally leads into Dr. Firestone’s two last suggestions — noticing how your partner expresses love, and “accepting your partner’s needs as different from your own.” Here, the same mindfulness should be applied to the notion that while you are committed to each other, you must recognize that you are different people with distinct ways of experiencing the world.

In summing up these principles, Dr. Firestone writes that “it’s okay for you to want more affection and for your partner to want more communication. It’s okay for one person to feel more loved by their partner cleaning the counter than saying, ‘I love you.’ Others might need the words. We each have different things to bring to the table and offer each other.”

In the end, the five tips for couples come with a consistent message: conscious communication is critical to maintaining the love that led to a relationship in the first place. We can all employ these tools to listen to, learn about, and love our partner, feeling confident that expressing and experiencing all a relationship has to offer is a two-way street.

Self-Ambition Is a Cancer​

Self-ambition is a cancer. Yes, I can explain.

Each of us is a member, a mere cell, in the human body. We’re not designed to stand alone. God has arranged the body with intention, assigning each part a task, a form, and a boundary. No one gets to define their role apart from the body. In this organism (i.e., the Church, humanity, creation), flourishing comes not through self-assertion but through faithful presence. We’re healthiest when each cell works in harmony, doing its small, particular job in its small, particular place.



But ambition resists this. Especially the religious kind. Especially mine and yours.

However subtly disguised, self-ambition does not want to be just a cell. It wants to be the body. It wants to be seen, followed, heard, and credited. It longs to ascend the scaffolding of influence and make a name that echoes across systems. The ambitious Christian does not dream of loving neighbors so much as managing movements. They don’t want to be local—they want to be global. The heart aches to “change the world” without changing diapers, without changing tone, or without changing course. We can wrap it in piety. We can pray over our platforms and publish for Jesus. But if we’re honest, we’re still playing Babel, building a tower, carving out a legacy, and crowning ourselves with bricks disguised as ministry goals.

And what do we call a cell that insists on growing beyond its bounds, multiplying itself at the expense of others, and refusing to serve the body’s health?

We call it cancer.

Ambition is Cancerous​

It’s a vivid metaphor, one that humbles and indicts me. Cancerous ambition grows in isolation from the body’s design, consuming resources but offering nothing of value in return. It wants attention, not alignment, power rather than participation. Its growth is not coordinated but competitive. And it leaves the rest of the body weakened, sometimes fatally.


Dostoyevsky saw this too. In The Brothers Karamazov, a character confesses:

“The more I love humanity in general, the less I love man in particular. In my dreams, I often make plans for the service of humanity… Yet I am incapable of living in the same room with anyone for two days together.”

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It’s the same disease. He cherishes the idea of humanity— abstract, grand, clean. But he finds actual humans inconvenient and grotesque. So he dreams of serving everyone while refusing to live with anyone.

Modern self-ambition is a theological mutation of that same sort of impulse. It exchanges names for numbers. It prefers crowds over communities. It confuses visibility with virtue. And in the end, it would rather be famous than faithful.

This is not a rejection of calling or even of influence. But it is a rejection of cancerous ambition, the kind that refuses limitation, bypasses repentance, and seeks to heal the world without submitting to the scalpel of Christ. To live rightly as a “cell,” we must be rooted… somewhere… with someone. We must believe that what we do in obscurity, in weakness, and long-term presence with real people is the path to health and holiness. Nothing flashy here, but it is faithful.

So, the question I return to isn’t “What can I build?” or “How much can I scale?” It’s this: Am I living in such a way that the body is healthier because I’m here? Because if not, I may be growing, but I’m not helping.

Scripture Reading — Exodus 40:34-38

Moses could not enter the tent of meeting because the cloud had settled on it. . . .
Exodus 40:35

I first approached the Grand Canyon while holding the hand of my two-year-old son, Derek. He was energetic and loved exploring the world around him with little concern for potential harm. As the south rim came into view, I experienced two emotions at the same time. I was stunned by the beauty before me. Creation reflects the glory of the Creator! At the same time, I felt genuine fear: one misstep, or one reckless move from my son, and the worst might happen! In a way, the very grandeur of the Grand Canyon made it dangerous.

The tabernacle was like that in some ways too. It filled the people with joy and awe in the majesty of God’s presence. But as the cloud of God’s presence descended, a danger emerged. God’s glorious presence is so holy that nothing impure or imperfect can be there with him. Even Moses had to be careful, for God had said, “You cannot see my face, for no one may see me and live” (Exodus 33:20).

We face a similar problem. We may long for God’s presence, but because of our sinful nature we are imperfect. But, thankfully for us, God has provided a way for people to live in his presence. His Son, Jesus, came to stand in for us, even giving up his own life to pay the debt for our sin, so that we can be declared right with God (Romans 3-4)! And now, because of Jesus’ finished work, we can be made new and enjoy life with God forever.

Lord Jesus, you took on our guilt and sin so that we can live in God’s presence. Hallelujah! Deepen in us a longing to live for you each day. Amen.