talking about canada....
These questions about canada were posted on an international tourism website and obviously the answers came from a fellow canuck.
Q: I have never seen it warm on tv, so how do the plants grow? (uk)
a: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
Q: Will i be able to see polar bears in the street?(usa)
a: Depends how much you've been drinking.
Q: I want to walk from vancouver to toronto - can i follow the railroad tracks? (sweden)
a: Sure, it's only four thousand miles, take lots of water.
Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in canada? (sweden)
a: So its true what they say about swedes.
Q: It is imperative that i find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed beaver. (italy)
a: Let's not touch this one.
Q: Are there any atms (cash machines) in canada? Can you send me a list of them in toronto, vancouver, edmonton and halifax? (uk)
a: What did your last slave die of ?
Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in canada?(usa)
a: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your north . . . Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every tuesday night in calgary. Come naked.
Q: Which direction is north in canada? (usa)
a: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
Q: Can i bring cutlery into canada? (uk)
a: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
Q: Can you send me the vienna boys' choir schedule? (usa)
a: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering ger-man-y, which is....oh forget it. Sure, the vienna boys choir plays every tuesday night in vancouver and in calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked