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Stocktaking my mediocre existence. Any views? Thanks in advance.

sweetiepie

Alfrescian
Loyal
I welcome any learned/useful and time tested opinion from well lived senior Sammyboyers in this forum.
Son, let my uncle leemind you that you still have a good 10 years or so to enjoy life. After 50 or even after 45 you will leelise there can never be good things happening in your life. Things will onlee go downhill as 1 age I.e you will start to have more health problem. Likelee You will start to have karchng bin and people start calling you uncle. Your loved ones friends leelatives will leave you 1 by 1. Noone is spared from this chain .
 

sweetiepie

Alfrescian
Loyal
Son, let my uncle leemind you that you still have a good 10 years or so to enjoy life. After 50 or even after 45 you will leelise there can never be good things happening in your life. Things will onlee go downhill as 1 age I.e you will start to have more health problem. Likelee You will start to have karchng bin and people start calling you uncle. Your loved ones friends leelatives will leave you 1 by 1. Noone is spared from this chain .
Don't think that after getting married having children having grand children you can lead another stage of life becas all of them have their own life to lead . You will either be a lonelee old man or with a jibye bin old wife.This is just a imagination of being a grandparent that most human beings are thinking. You may be financiallee more stable but money cannot leeplace what you have lost :sneaky:
 

sweetiepie

Alfrescian
Loyal
Basically my job is the only thing that often brings me joy. I truly enjoy what I do while I'm at work
My uncle think you enjoyed your job not becas you leelee enjoy the work. Noone can enjoy a orfid work in this world I.e it is just a self lie to escape from something. There is no such thing enjoying a orfid job that person must be a nutcase. In your case My uncle think is becas you are good looking and enjoy the attraction that you leeceive from work and not becas of the work itself.
 

JohnTan

Alfrescian (InfP)
Generous Asset
I have a new GF now. Despite so, there are times I wonder if I don't bother about getting married, have kids, start another journey in life - is it ok?

It's not okay. It'll hit you hard one day when you realize you're going to grow old alone and die alone, unloved. It's just as bad as lousy parents who fall out with their kids or lose total control over them. So, it doesn't help to look towards such families and feel thankful that you're not married and don't have kids.

Pick your wife carefully. The woman with you may be girlfriend material, but she may not be wife material.
 

sweetiepie

Alfrescian
Loyal
It's not okay. It'll hit you hard one day when you realize you're going to grow old alone and die alone, unloved. It's just as bad as lousy parents who fall out with their kids or lose total control over them. So, it doesn't help to look towards such families and feel thankful that you're not married and don't have kids.

Pick your wife carefully. The woman with you may be girlfriend material, but she may not be wife material.
Don't think that after getting married having children having grand children you can lead another stage of life becas all of them have their own life to lead . You will either be a lonelee old man or with a jibye bin old wife.This is just a imagination of being a grandparent that most human beings are thinking. You may be financiallee more stable but money cannot leeplace what you have lost
 

Datingafter35

Alfrescian
Loyal
Just do what makes you happy and fills you with a sense of purpose.

I sucked at trading forex and marketing but I can't stop looking at charts and planning my next launch like drafting headlines and writing stories.

But they only make my bank account small.
 

JustOneSingh

Alfrescian
Loyal
That's what most people do. Whether that's enough for you is up to you.


If you don't feel it strongly, don't get married or have kids. It's a big commitment. Even people who want kids tend to be shocked at how much commitment and effort it takes. As you mentioned earlier, you like romance in the early stages, then get bored. Marriage is not romance, but a partnership with all the difficulties that entails.



Search within yourself. Is there anything that you desire? If there is, then go and do it. That's all.


An image that comes to mind is that you're locked in a comfort zone. Your job gives you some happiness. A few others like short term romance or exercise or masturbation are just little highlights to elevate the balance of the time you have left. Other than that you're just existing. So you've formed a life around that job and those few highlights already mentioned.

It seems that mainly your missing purpose in an occupation. Of the things you mentioned, your job seems to resonate the most with you. But I think it's insufficient from the tone of your post. You should find an occupation (not just a job!) that gives you meaning and purpose. Something that makes you want to wake up early and rush to it. Not just for a few weeks or months but one that will keep you engaged and excited for years. Unfortunately in the Singapore context this is largely ignored as an important part of growing up and something I spend a lot of time advising people on.

So go and think about it.

Bhai,

Very wise words.

:thumbsup:
 

bigcockman

Alfrescian
Loyal
ur pathetic sexistence is 2 eat, sh*t n die (no ref 2 a regular @ tis kopitiam) ...

changing ut tots, direction n realign ur life purpose is futile ...
Actually, that's what I think as well once in a while. Humans seem to have too much living time in this planet. When I am outside, I see so many seniors walking around wandering aimlessly having too much time on their hands. I wonder I will end up like this when I am.due for retirement in future.
 

bigcockman

Alfrescian
Loyal
you're locked in a comfort zone. Your job gives you some happiness. A few others like short term romance or exercise or masturbation are just little highlights to elevate the balance of the time you have left. Other than that you're just existing. So you've formed a life around that job and those few highlights already mentioned.

It seems that mainly your missing purpose in an occupation. Of the things you mentioned, your job seems to resonate the most with you. But I think it's insufficient from the tone of your post. You should find an occupation (not just a job!) that gives you meaning and purpose. Something that makes you want to wake up early and rush to it. Not just for a few weeks or months but one that will keep you engaged and excited for years. Unfortunately in the Singapore context this is largely ignored as an important part of growing up and something I spend a lot of time advising people on.
Thanks for the insight about comfort zone. I agree.

Occupation as in passion?
 

bigcockman

Alfrescian
Loyal
Start giving.

Start giving your time, giving your advice, giving your money, giving your effort- to whichever cause that you hold dear to your heart.

You can thank me later :coffee::coffee::coffee:
Interesting. Does giving sex to women count? Serious question. Not joking.
 

bigcockman

Alfrescian
Loyal
How about trying to do something creative like writing a song, or writing a screenplay, or setting up a website, or writing a book, or setting up a small business, or creating a club for people to do the thing(s) you enjoy?

You can't take your money with you when you die, but nobody can take away something useful or interesting that you have created. :wink:
Sounds like a good idea. I am thinking of writing something like a conversation between two cats and what they talk about when they meow meow to each other.
 

bigcockman

Alfrescian
Loyal
God says ," be fruitful and multiply" did you do that?

If no, then you are not following your destiny. Please pack your bags and spread the singkee genes all over world
I don't think I have good genes. I have atrial fibrillation once in a while. Sad but true.
 

bigcockman

Alfrescian
Loyal
when i was ur age, was going thru a career crisis. managed to resign from my job, luckily a very good friend help me on the career switch.
the initial 2 years was hell cos gonna start all over again.

find ur path, and if money and time permits, go for it. u got no family commitment except maybe your parents.
no one got many 10 years left, unless you're born rich

cheers
I am not worried about money. I am thankful to my daddy for his financial planning. So maybe I am in my comfort zone as @nightsafari stated
 

bigcockman

Alfrescian
Loyal
Son, let my uncle leemind you that you still have a good 10 years or so to enjoy life. After 50 or even after 45 you will leelise there can never be good things happening in your life. Things will onlee go downhill as 1 age I.e you will start to have more health problem. Likelee You will start to have karchng bin and people start calling you uncle. Your loved ones friends leelatives will leave you 1 by 1. Noone is spared from this chain .

Don't think that after getting married having children having grand children you can lead another stage of life becas all of them have their own life to lead . You will either be a lonelee old man or with a jibye bin old wife.This is just a imagination of being a grandparent that most human beings are thinking. You may be financiallee more stable but money cannot leeplace what you have lost :sneaky:

My uncle think you enjoyed your job not becas you leelee enjoy the work. Noone can enjoy a orfid work in this world I.e it is just a self lie to escape from something. There is no such thing enjoying a orfid job that person must be a nutcase. In your case My uncle think is becas you are good looking and enjoy the attraction that you leeceive from work and not becas of the work itself.
Seems a practical and realistic approach to life. Sort of like this approach but feels that it lacks "romance".
 

bigcockman

Alfrescian
Loyal
It's not okay. It'll hit you hard one day when you realize you're going to grow old alone and die alone, unloved. It's just as bad as lousy parents who fall out with their kids or lose total control over them. So, it doesn't help to look towards such families and feel thankful that you're not married and don't have kids.

Pick your wife carefully. The woman with you may be girlfriend material, but she may not be wife material.
An aspirational and ideal searching approach as compared to Mr Sweetiepies approach. But sounds like buying insurance sort of approach.
 

bigcockman

Alfrescian
Loyal
only if you care about feeling fulfilled in terms of hours or days.
Actually sometimes, I fantasize about being a sophisticated and well sought after high see male prostitute rendering services to filthy rich pleasant looking Tai Tai's. Weird right?
 
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