While surfing for Mahathir's ribbling about Ferraris on Singapore roads for another thread, I came across some jokes about him instead. Like to share these light-hearted moments here. ***
Have a good laugh for this weekend. (Apologies if some of you have read about them before - have a re-run 2nd laugh instead!)
Joke No 1 - Mahathir's Parachute
Bill Clinton, Lee Kuan Yew and Mahathir arranged to go on a world tour, traveling on a plane which can only take 4 people, including the pilot.
Just before they left, Bill Clinton suddenly announced that he would like to bring his little nephew along.' But the plane is designed to take 4 people only, and I'm afraid it may crash!' worried the pilot.
However, Clinton insisted, and finally the boy was allowed to board the plane. True enough, the plane encountered problems and was going to crash, but to their dismay, there were only 4 parachutes.
Clinton grabbed the 1st parachute and exclaimed,' I'm the president of the mighty USA, and my life is the most valuable!' and jumped down the plane without a second look.
Lee Kuan Yew grabbed the 2nd parachute and exclaimed,' I'm the Senior Minister of Singapore, and my life is just as important!' and jumped down.
Mahathir, not to be outdone, grabbed the 3rd parachute and exclaimed,' I'm the Prime Minister of Malaysia, the most important of all!!!' and also jumped down.
Now, only the pilot and the little boy was left. The pilot said,'Boy, you still have a long way to go in life. Take the last parachute, and I'll sacrifice myself.'
The boy looked at the pilot and smiled,' Oh, we'll both live. Just now that Malay man took my schoolbag and jumped down with it!'
Joke No 2 - Mahathir's Miracle
After he put Anwar in jail, Mahathir received a lot of criticism from different sources.
Everything he did was sure to get the journalists and diplomats screaming at him about corruption and cronyism etc.
Finally, he was so fed up that he called all the journalists and diplomats to Johor Baru.'
Now, for all of you, I'm going to do something which you all cannot complain about.' and he magically stepped onto the waters of the Straits of Johore and walked the full 1 km to the other side without falling into the water.
The onlookers were amazed and Mahathir was sure he'd get some compliments in the news tomorrow. The next day, Mahathir was shocked to find in newspapers headlines across the planet:
The Stars : 'Mahathir Can't Swim'
The New York Times : 'Mahathir crosses borders without going through immigrations'
The Straits Times : 'Mahathir uses propaganda to curry favor'
Joke No 3 - Mahathir - Making Malaysians Happy
Mahathir, Anwar and Daim are on a long flight in an executive jet.
Daim pulls out a RM100 bill and says' I'm going to throw this RM100 bill out and make someone down below happy.'
Anwar, not wanting to be outdone, says,' If that was my RM100 bill, I would split it into 2 RM50 bills and make two people down below happy.'
Of course Mahathir doesn't want these two ministers to outdo him, so he pipes in, 'I would instead take 100 RM1 bills and throw them out to make 100 people just a little happier.'
At this point the pilot, who has overheard all this bragging and can't stand it anymore, comes out and says,' I think I'll throw all three of you out of this plane and make 20 million Malaysians happy.'
*** In case some of you've missed his joke about Ferraris on Singapore roads :
"When Singaporeans drive their Ferraris on Singapore roads, one step on the accelerator and they end up in the sea."
More jokes at :
http://www.jokebuddha.com/Mahathir
Have a good laugh for this weekend. (Apologies if some of you have read about them before - have a re-run 2nd laugh instead!)
Joke No 1 - Mahathir's Parachute
Bill Clinton, Lee Kuan Yew and Mahathir arranged to go on a world tour, traveling on a plane which can only take 4 people, including the pilot.
Just before they left, Bill Clinton suddenly announced that he would like to bring his little nephew along.' But the plane is designed to take 4 people only, and I'm afraid it may crash!' worried the pilot.
However, Clinton insisted, and finally the boy was allowed to board the plane. True enough, the plane encountered problems and was going to crash, but to their dismay, there were only 4 parachutes.
Clinton grabbed the 1st parachute and exclaimed,' I'm the president of the mighty USA, and my life is the most valuable!' and jumped down the plane without a second look.
Lee Kuan Yew grabbed the 2nd parachute and exclaimed,' I'm the Senior Minister of Singapore, and my life is just as important!' and jumped down.
Mahathir, not to be outdone, grabbed the 3rd parachute and exclaimed,' I'm the Prime Minister of Malaysia, the most important of all!!!' and also jumped down.
Now, only the pilot and the little boy was left. The pilot said,'Boy, you still have a long way to go in life. Take the last parachute, and I'll sacrifice myself.'
The boy looked at the pilot and smiled,' Oh, we'll both live. Just now that Malay man took my schoolbag and jumped down with it!'
Joke No 2 - Mahathir's Miracle
After he put Anwar in jail, Mahathir received a lot of criticism from different sources.
Everything he did was sure to get the journalists and diplomats screaming at him about corruption and cronyism etc.
Finally, he was so fed up that he called all the journalists and diplomats to Johor Baru.'
Now, for all of you, I'm going to do something which you all cannot complain about.' and he magically stepped onto the waters of the Straits of Johore and walked the full 1 km to the other side without falling into the water.
The onlookers were amazed and Mahathir was sure he'd get some compliments in the news tomorrow. The next day, Mahathir was shocked to find in newspapers headlines across the planet:
The Stars : 'Mahathir Can't Swim'
The New York Times : 'Mahathir crosses borders without going through immigrations'
The Straits Times : 'Mahathir uses propaganda to curry favor'
Joke No 3 - Mahathir - Making Malaysians Happy
Mahathir, Anwar and Daim are on a long flight in an executive jet.
Daim pulls out a RM100 bill and says' I'm going to throw this RM100 bill out and make someone down below happy.'
Anwar, not wanting to be outdone, says,' If that was my RM100 bill, I would split it into 2 RM50 bills and make two people down below happy.'
Of course Mahathir doesn't want these two ministers to outdo him, so he pipes in, 'I would instead take 100 RM1 bills and throw them out to make 100 people just a little happier.'
At this point the pilot, who has overheard all this bragging and can't stand it anymore, comes out and says,' I think I'll throw all three of you out of this plane and make 20 million Malaysians happy.'
*** In case some of you've missed his joke about Ferraris on Singapore roads :
"When Singaporeans drive their Ferraris on Singapore roads, one step on the accelerator and they end up in the sea."
More jokes at :
http://www.jokebuddha.com/Mahathir
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