Today I was reading the papers and I saw my old friend Rajaratnam in it, and even though he is very forgetful in his last few years, but whenever someone mentioned the name 'Harry' there's a smile appeared on his lips.
Now I will tell you all a hidden secret that I kept in my hearts for many years how I get my English name 'Harry'.
Rajaratnam was a old classmate of mine during my studies in English in the early 50's. We were like buddies, always go drinking and doing activities together. One day we were so damn tired and stress out due to exams, and we decided to go for a sauna to distress ourselves.
When we were removing our pants, out of a sudden, a bunch of very fucking hairy bushes exploded at my bottom. And I shouted,"HOLY BOOMZ! What a fucking HAIRY bushes exploded at my dick!!!"
"Yeah bro! It's so damn fucking Hairy like bushes in the trees, more fucking HAIRY than me an Indian man!!!" replied Rajaratnam.
Suddenly I had an idea, the Ang Mos keeps telling me to get an English name as they can address me easier than Kuan Yew Kuan Yew. So I decided," OK Raja, since the Ang Mos wants me to have an English name, I will called myself HAIRY!" And Raja agrees to it.
I went to the England council and told them I want to change my name as HAIRY LEE!" The Ang Mos were shocked and said," Oh sir, we do not have such a name in our England dictionary called HAIRY, but only HARRY." I argued with them for hours and they insisted me to use HARRY. I was so disappointed during that time and shouted," Give me what you want, you stupid fucking dick heads!" And from that time on, my name is 'HARRY LEE' and not 'HAIRY LEE'.
The England Ang Mos, they never learned, until now they only knows how to do their things in one way. Not flexible like me, as I can do things in many ways, as I can twist and turned the ways to my advantages. That is why you see me very successful in doing businesses in my kingdom Singapore. I can twist and turn and bend the rules and regulations in Singapore to my own advantages and that is why I am so successful and fucking filthy rich in Singapore. Not like the England Ang Mos so square headed and doesnt make any big money in their lifetime.
But even until now I am so super filthy rich, I still missed my actually name 'HAIRY'. So please called me Mr Super 'HAIRY LEE', and whoever calls me in that name 'HAIRY' and spells it out in front of me H-A-I-R-Y, it will surely make my day ah!!!
REMEMBER ME ALWAYS AS MR 'HAIRY LEE', OK AH???
Hahahahahehehee!
