Lau and Lee tcss

Ernest: Hi Harry. Welcome.

Harry: Hi bro-in-law. Great to touch base with you again. Never expected you to up-lorry before me

Ernest: No choice Harry. It is up to the Lord. I was praying you join me soon

Harry: Fuck you lah chow chee bye

Ernest: Please Harry, no vulgarities in front of me, ok? Btw, you look troubled. What's wrong? Upset that Choo chose another man?

Harry: What to do? Cant blame her. She waited too long for me. Bloody daughter of mine refused to help. Doctor for fuck! Ask me to get my SO's pistol to end my life, I dont have the courage. Useless Wei Ling.

Ernest: That's all Harry?

Harry: Nope. Loong emailed me. Tuck Yew resigned.

Ernest: So? He is a useless boy anyway. I was his principal when he was in school. How he became Rear Admiral, I dunno want to say.

Harry: It is not just Tuck Yew. The recent batch of ACSians in PAP abd Civil Service seepay bo standard. What the fuck did you do or not do during your time as principal?

Ernest: Dont blame me Harry. You motherfuckers always select the wrong candidates.

to be continued .........

Earnest Lau was the one who imparted upon me the importance of grammatically correct English. He also penalised us heavily when we made mistakes.

He was the best of the best!

He did all that stroking or poking your arse?

Leongsam said:

He was the best of the best!

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How can a chink be the best of the best!

only angmoh can

Leongsam said:

Earnest Lau was the one who imparted upon me the importance of grammatically correct English. He also penalised us heavily when we made mistakes.

He was the best of the best!

Click to expand...

So now you are trying to claim that you are from ACS not Bukit Merah Secondary School.

Leongsam said:

Earnest Lau was the one who imparted upon me the importance of grammatically correct English. He also penalised us heavily when we made mistakes.

He was the best of the best!

Click to expand...

In all my years as principal, my bestest student was Leongsam. He is the goodest of the good. If only he became a MIW, my bro-in-law would have less headaches. Leongsam could even be Harry's son-in-law!

true be told
leongsam is a brilliant guy.
if he is an MP or ministarr
sillypootians will be screwed deep deep without even knowing it.

Reddog said:

So now you are trying to claim that you are from ACS not Bukit Merah Secondary School.

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I was expelled and ended up in Bukit Merah.

Leongsam said:

I was expelled and ended up in Bukit Merah.

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IQ is inborn.

Knowledge just augment the way one makes decision.

good school don't make one's IQ higher.

expelled because u were caught masturbating in toilet ?

greedy and cunning said:

expelled because u were caught masturbating in toilet ?

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They let me off twice but was expelled when they caught me a third time.

Leongsam said:

Earnest Lau was the one who imparted upon me the importance of grammatically correct English. He also penalised us heavily when we made mistakes.

He was the best of the best!

Click to expand...

oi shit skin 羅漢師傅 lee um si tak kommunist school ah

Harry: The scholar system isn't working. We are getting more and more lemons and I don't like the song "Lemon Tree."

Earnest: ACSians have contributed greatly. Look here Harry. We gave you Vivien, Shi Lu, Arthur Fong, Keng Swee, Peng Kee, Richard Hu, Lam Pin Min, Kim San, Tuck Yew, SR Nathan, Eng Hen, Kian Min, Boon Ann, Chuan Jin, Soo Khoon, the late Dr Tay Eng Soon, Cheow Tong and SC Alvin Yeo. Isn't that enough, Harry?

Harry: Tell me Ernie, tell me honestly, how many in that list did make it. Don't forget that in the same arena, ACS produced Soon Juan, Show Mao, See Tong, Gerald Giam and the hopeless How Donkey Doong.

Earnest: Take it in perspective. For every basket of lemons, sure to have spoilt ones. That is why lemon law exists, right? You are a trained lawyer and surely you know that, Harry.

Harry: Ok, ok. Let me give you an honest assessment of those named. Keng Swee was brilliant. I tongpanged on his good work and claimed credit, That is my style, you know that. Richard Hu and Bob Tay were both decent chaps though not evil enough to be politicians but I valued their contributions. Kim San's only weakness was his playboy ways. I guess you cannot control a man's small head all the time. Big head much easier to control. Like what I did to 60% of the voters. They are idiots. SR was very obedient so I trusted him as President. Paid him good money to be kuai kuai. Soo Khoon became a rebel when we ignored him and told him to step down.

Earnest: These chaps all history liao. Tell me more about the current batch.

Harry: Vivien is a headache. Very impressive during interviews before he joined us. Rajaratnam screwed up big time. He was the one who talent spotted Vivien. Tuck Yew CMI. Glad he was told to get lost. His stay would cost PAP at least 200,000 votes. Eng Hen is doing ok. I give him 6 out of 10. Tharman is the best so far. Easily 8 out of 10 but he is Ah Neh.

Earnest: So what if Tharman is Ah Neh?

Harry: You will never understand. You don't have any kids. An Ah Neh tried to tackle Ling when she was much younger. Fucking shit! I never trusted Nehs. When Chok Tong joins us, ask him the same question. Based on his medical condition, likely to be our kaki soon.

Earnest: I heard from friends here that everyone is avoiding you. True?

Harry: If Devan and Cheang Wan siamed me, that I can understand. Basket, Keng Swee, Chin Chye, Raja, Sui Sen, Barker are all avoiding me. I hope Yew Kok takes me as a friend when his plane touches down soon. I really missed him, when alive and dead now.

Earnest: Between Tuck Yew, Vivien and Show Mao, I always knew the Taiwan-kia would be more successful. He would have been a better choice for the PAP.

Harry: With the benefit of hindsight, Lau-ay, you are spot on.

Earnest: How do you see the coming GE? Got chance to improve over 2011 results?

Harry: WP will retain all its seats. Easily. We aren't going to send in our tua kong candidates just to unseat WP. Useless idoits like Victor will be despatched to Aljunied. Charles will be BBQed in Punggol East for Ah Lian to bring home to makan the bak kua. Useless Charles thinks he is a real prince. In reality, a useless piece of shit!

Earnest: Go on, Harry. I am all ears. haven't had a conversation with you for years.

Harry: My bet is the fall of EC GRC and 2 SMCs. I understand WP attracted some good candidates lately. Leon should stand out. Non-Chinese version of Show Mao.

Earnest: Your boy will make it?

Harry: Should. maybe 54%. In Cantonese, ëmu she or wont die.

Earnest: That is a shame. As PM, smelly smelly must get at least 70%. Must lead by example.

Harry: He has limitations. A great disappointment. Jut sought my advice over Tuck Yew's resignation. I told him, get another General. We have lots of them. See how capable the 3-star chap was? He organised my funeral man! Now, he is going to be a MIW.

to be continued .......................

Leongsam said:

They let me off twice but was expelled when they caught me a third time.

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I heard about this. You were too much. Why three times within an hour?

LOL!!!!!

Thanks bro GD.

Really miss Scroobal's Tales of the Istana. Ah Sam should make them sticky.

GoldenDragon said:

Ernest: Hi Harry. Welcome.

Harry: Hi bro-in-law. Great to touch base with you again. Never expected you to up-lorry before me

Ernest: No choice Harry. It is up to the Lord. I was praying you join me soon

Harry: Fuck you lah chow chee bye

Ernest: Please Harry, no vulgarities in front of me, ok? Btw, you look troubled. What's wrong? Upset that Choo chose another man?

Harry: What to do? Cant blame her. She waited too long for me. Bloody daughter of mine refused to help. Doctor for fuck! Ask me to get my SO's pistol to end my life, I dont have the courage. Useless Wei Ling.

Ernest: That's all Harry?

Harry: Nope. Loong emailed me. Tuck Yew resigned.

Ernest: So? He is a useless boy anyway. I was his principal when he was in school. How he became Rear Admiral, I dunno want to say.

Harry: It is not just Tuck Yew. The recent batch of ACSians in PAP abd Civil Service seepay bo standard. What the fuck did you do or not do during your time as principal?

Ernest: Dont blame me Harry. You motherfuckers always select the wrong candidates.

to be continued .........

Click to expand...

Thick Face Black Heart said:

LOL!!!!!

Thanks bro GD.

Really miss Scroobal's Tales of the Istana. Ah Sam should make them sticky.

Click to expand...

Welcome bro. Will do my best. If can be 25% as good as scroobal's, good enough for me.

Will Scroobal emerge during this GE???

Earnest: Enough about politics. We did produce excellent civil servants for the government and people of Singapore, Harry.

Harry: Well, that is partially true. ACS gave me Woo Bih Li, Rear Admiral Ronnie Tay, Sim Kee Boon, Siong Guan, VK Rajah, Andrew Phang, Desmond Kuek, Glenn Knight, Khoo Boon Hui, Ng Joo Hee, Michael Hwang, Playboy Winston Choo, Steven Chong, Choo Han Teck, Belinda Ang and many more.

Earnest: Shouldn't you be pleased with that list? Quite a number made it as High Court Judges, Harry.

Harry: That is true, Ernie. But I just don't understand why ACS boys CMI in the SPF. Look at Boon Hui. A complete failure. How the SPF functioned reasonably well during his stint as CP continues to worry me. When Boon Hui left, in came a young boy. My God, I thought Boon Hui was bad enough, until Joo Hee came. Tell me, what did ACS teach its students? Run away during crisis time? He continued his leave to play golf in Batam the day after the LI riots. I almost fainted when Loong told me that. Chee Hean was fucking furious and alerted us that he must send NJH to join another failure in ENV - Vivien.

Earnest: Don't blame ACS. Blame your blind men at PSC. Scholarships given to them. When they come back, cant work also rapid promotions. Just like your son.

Harry: Lau-ay don't like that. Loong is my boy-boy. I had to take care of him.

Earnest: The scholar system you implemented must be abolished. Why invest millions like Sammyboy Winnipegjets said on these scholars and get wood or in return?

Harry: I need to think this over. The way we are heading, WP will soon take over. I don't want to see Show Mao as PM and GG as DPM.

Earnest: That is beyond you, Harry. You are no longer there. Over here, we make the best use of our time to relax and enjoy.

Harry: I cant. I promised Sinkies I will rise up when things go wrong

Earnest: That was foolish, isn't it?

Harry: Bo pien. I was desperate then. Should have kept my mouth shut


to be continued ...................................

amazonforest said:

Will Scroobal emerge during this GE???

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Where have you been the last 5 and a half years?

Leongsam said:

They let me off twice but was expelled when they caught me a third time.

Click to expand...

GoldenDragon said:

I heard about this. You were too much. Why three times within an hour?

Click to expand...

five times and he'd go blind, four and he'd need glasses, just like wanker no-porn lui - thrice accounts for the twitch

Earnest: From Boon Hui to Joo Hee. Two consecutive ACSians as CP. Was hoping DC Raja Kumar be appointed CP after Joo Hee to make it three-in-a-row for the ACS family. Didn't happen. Why?

Harry: My Cabinet colleagues could not take it anymore. We been suffering in silence since Boon Hui's appointment. When we kicked him to MHA in a newly created Snr DS post, Loong thought problem now all over. Never did he expect another lemon to sit on CP chair. Tell me, given that kind of experience, we chose not to take risk with another ACSian and appointed a Chinese helicopter as CP. He is doing well, unlike your Hui and Hee.

Earnest: Taught both. Wasn't impressed with either. If asked to name the best 2, who would you choose

Harry: Easy to answer that. Kee Boon and Siong Guan. Both were Heads of the Civil Service. But I still prefer Swee Keat. Easily the best PPS I ever had. Siong Guan was the first.

Earnest: Well, time for a Tiger now


to be continued ................................