Redditer: NS is the worst thing that happened to me and everyday I wish I never existed

[Tragedeigh]

NS is the worst thing that happened to me and everyday I wish I never existed​

Personal Experience

I don’t care anymore I’m just gonna say it. I fucking hate the country I was born in, I hate the accent, the people, the culture. This country sucks, the world sucks, everything sucks.

I went into ns thinking that this is just another thing I guess I have to do because we’re all part of this Singaporean system, the economic wheel where you go to school then national service then uni the job then marriage then bto then kids then those kids repeat the cycle. Obviously I lived in some ideal where I thought I’d break out of this stupid system that I hated but only after NS since they made it legally mandatory.

So I go into NS and I hate everything about it, the stupid hierarchy and egos of kids no older than me, I see the worst in these people and how we all prioritise ourselves and self interests to get ahead and advance, and not only that but we are rewarded in doing so. I finish my bmt not without falling super sick and going out of training (OOT), I end up getting posted to a somewhat chill unit but then I can’t see myself living in this state of perpetual purposeless for the next more than one and a half years. My hatred for this country and the people around me grows, I have no purpose after NS either.

I don’t know what to do with my life and I have no idea what I’m doing in camp everyday and I can’t bear having to do this for however long with nothing to look forward to after. I have no sense of purpose to serve the country, I have no sense of belonging to Singapore. I don’t care about defending some stupid island just because I was born on it. And I think I wish it were never so that I was born because this life is more troublesome than it is worth.

I see the life laid out for me and most people, the way the system intends us to live. Perpetual cogs in an economic machine, expendable numbers and statistics to fulfil some metric of growth. I want to kill myself, I wish I could not exist.

Long story short I have a last ditch attempt before I actually end my life by seeking help and I end up getting Pes F. This was about half a year ago. I am still struggling with mostly passive suicidal ideation. My human experience is more pain than it’s worth. I was probably suffering with this on a milder less noticeable level before NS but fuck me did my time in NS make me realise how much it sucks being alive, especially when you are trapped into a cause that you want no part of and are there by legality and force.

Thanks for reading, I’ll take it down if it’s inappropriate or it’s illegal to talk like this in this country.

 

[batman1]

NS for Sinkees
Jobs for Foreigners

 

[Dreamliner787]

Remember to carry your frustration into the ballot booth.

 

[A Singaporean]

What a fucking loser.

 

[Sustanon]

Are they still forcing those PCB garbage zhams onto NS boys now?

 

[birdie69]

NS is the worst thing that happened to me and everyday I wish I never existed​

Personal Experience

I don’t care anymore I’m just gonna say it. I fucking hate the country I was born in, I hate the accent, the people, the culture. This country sucks, the world sucks, everything sucks.

I went into ns thinking that this is just another thing I guess I have to do because we’re all part of this Singaporean system, the economic wheel where you go to school then national service then uni the job then marriage then bto then kids then those kids repeat the cycle. Obviously I lived in some ideal where I thought I’d break out of this stupid system that I hated but only after NS since they made it legally mandatory.

So I go into NS and I hate everything about it, the stupid hierarchy and egos of kids no older than me, I see the worst in these people and how we all prioritise ourselves and self interests to get ahead and advance, and not only that but we are rewarded in doing so. I finish my bmt not without falling super sick and going out of training (OOT), I end up getting posted to a somewhat chill unit but then I can’t see myself living in this state of perpetual purposeless for the next more than one and a half years. My hatred for this country and the people around me grows, I have no purpose after NS either.

I don’t know what to do with my life and I have no idea what I’m doing in camp everyday and I can’t bear having to do this for however long with nothing to look forward to after. I have no sense of purpose to serve the country, I have no sense of belonging to Singapore. I don’t care about defending some stupid island just because I was born on it. And I think I wish it were never so that I was born because this life is more troublesome than it is worth.

I see the life laid out for me and most people, the way the system intends us to live. Perpetual cogs in an economic machine, expendable numbers and statistics to fulfil some metric of growth. I want to kill myself, I wish I could not exist.

Long story short I have a last ditch attempt before I actually end my life by seeking help and I end up getting Pes F. This was about half a year ago. I am still struggling with mostly passive suicidal ideation. My human experience is more pain than it’s worth. I was probably suffering with this on a milder less noticeable level before NS but fuck me did my time in NS make me realise how much it sucks being alive, especially when you are trapped into a cause that you want no part of and are there by legality and force.

Thanks for reading, I’ll take it down if it’s inappropriate or it’s illegal to talk like this in this country.

You still have to serve 10 years ICT!

 

[VanDick]

You still have to serve 10 years ICT!

He is Pes F and utterly useless to the SAF, so no need ICT.

But his mental health is so fucked up right now that the only option for him in life is the IMH.

 

[songsongjurong]

Sinkies on active,reservist on standby duties get their weekend ruined,disrupted from family time, restful sat,while ceca mows down innocent pedestrian, FTs enjoy sunny weekend ,mucking around town.

 

[Sinkiesuk]

NS for Sinkees
Jobs for Foreigners

Stupid nation plus empowering women.

 

[syed putra]

Remember to carry your frustration into the ballot booth.

No point as opposition has not state their stand on NS. They may make it 3 years