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- Apr 9, 2009
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Maintenance payments: Be fair
I REFER to Madam Chua Chor Luan's letter ("Throw the book at serial defaulters"; July 9).
Divorce is not something that people think of or plan for when they marry. A failed marriage is an unfortunate event for a couple and their families, especially when young children are involved.
Marriages fail for a variety of reasons, and it is not always the men's fault.
The Women's Charter was created with an apparent bias to protect the weaker sex against male dominance. With society changing - many women are now working and independent, and more men are taking on the responsibilities and tasks in caring for the family - it would be a good time to review the charter in the context of a holistic Family Charter, where all stakeholders - men, women and children - are given fair and equal protection.
To continue the practice, where only women are entitled to alimony and men are solely responsible to pay for child maintenance, may cause men to rethink the idea of marriage.
The Government should consider introducing preventive and educational measures for couples planning to get married. Young men should be told clearly of their responsibilities and obligations in the event that their marriages end in divorce. This may not be sufficiently done upfront today.
In fact, some couples may go into marriage without the necessary preparation and training to be good partners and parents.
Finally, the current problem where husbands do not pay their dues needs a more holistic and inclusive approach, and should be reviewed fairly on the reasons why they may not pay their maintenance regularly. I dare say that in some cases, the women are partly to blame - for example, refusing to allow the fathers access to their children - or there may be cases where the men are unemployed and hardly able to support themselves.
Tan Boon Chye
I REFER to Madam Chua Chor Luan's letter ("Throw the book at serial defaulters"; July 9).
Divorce is not something that people think of or plan for when they marry. A failed marriage is an unfortunate event for a couple and their families, especially when young children are involved.
Marriages fail for a variety of reasons, and it is not always the men's fault.
The Women's Charter was created with an apparent bias to protect the weaker sex against male dominance. With society changing - many women are now working and independent, and more men are taking on the responsibilities and tasks in caring for the family - it would be a good time to review the charter in the context of a holistic Family Charter, where all stakeholders - men, women and children - are given fair and equal protection.
To continue the practice, where only women are entitled to alimony and men are solely responsible to pay for child maintenance, may cause men to rethink the idea of marriage.
The Government should consider introducing preventive and educational measures for couples planning to get married. Young men should be told clearly of their responsibilities and obligations in the event that their marriages end in divorce. This may not be sufficiently done upfront today.
In fact, some couples may go into marriage without the necessary preparation and training to be good partners and parents.
Finally, the current problem where husbands do not pay their dues needs a more holistic and inclusive approach, and should be reviewed fairly on the reasons why they may not pay their maintenance regularly. I dare say that in some cases, the women are partly to blame - for example, refusing to allow the fathers access to their children - or there may be cases where the men are unemployed and hardly able to support themselves.
Tan Boon Chye
