- Joined
- Aug 20, 2022
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I was 27 and lost a 5-figure HDB deposit
When I lost that HDB deposit, I thought it meant I had failed at love and adulthood all at once.
I carried so much shame watching others move ahead while I was starting again. With time, I realised that money wasn't wasted.
It was the price of clarity and the courage to walk away before locking myself into a life that didn't feel right. Sometimes what looks like a setback is protection you only understand later.
......
Let's talk about the "BTO Trap." In Singapore, we're taught that a flat is the goal, but no one tells you that a 5-room flat feels like a prison when you're with the wrong person. When I walked away, I didn't just lose a deposit; I felt like I lost my "future."
But looking back at 32, that 5-figure loss was the best investment I ever made. It bought me my freedom. If you're staying because of the wait time, please hear me: It is cheaper to lose your deposit than to lose yourself in a marriage that's already broken. Your peace is non-negotiable.
I was 27 and lost a 5-figure HDB deposit
When I lost that HDB deposit, I thought it meant I had failed at love and adulthood all at once.
I carried so much shame watching others move ahead while I was starting again. With time, I realised that money wasn't wasted.
It was the price of clarity and the courage to walk away before locking myself into a life that didn't feel right. Sometimes what looks like a setback is protection you only understand later.
......
Let's talk about the "BTO Trap." In Singapore, we're taught that a flat is the goal, but no one tells you that a 5-room flat feels like a prison when you're with the wrong person. When I walked away, I didn't just lose a deposit; I felt like I lost my "future."
But looking back at 32, that 5-figure loss was the best investment I ever made. It bought me my freedom. If you're staying because of the wait time, please hear me: It is cheaper to lose your deposit than to lose yourself in a marriage that's already broken. Your peace is non-negotiable.

