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Sad to admit I am all talk only.

His horny lose mine.

A man and woman were dating and he asked her to marry him. She told him to prove his love to her she wanted him to get her name, Wendy, tattooed on his penis. When it was erect is said Wendy and when it was limp if said Wy. They got married and went to Jamaica to a nude beach for their...

My Dog Went down this morning to the DHSS to sign my Dog on. The woman said, "Dogs are not eligible to draw benefit".. I explained to her that my Dog is black, unemployed, idle, can't speak English and has no clue who his dad is. She looked in her policy book to see what it...

The Sheriff pulled up next to the guy unloading garbage out of his pick-up into the ditch. The Sheriff asked, "Why are you dumping garbage in the ditch? Don't you see that sign right over your head?" "Yep," he replied. "That's why I'm dumpin' it here, 'cause it says: 'Fine For Dumping Garbage.' "

The owner of a golf course in Georgia was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He called her into his office and said, "Y'all graduated from the University of Georgia and I need some help. If I wuz to give yew $20,000, minus 14%...

An elderly couple, who had just learned how to send text messages on their mobile phones. The wife was a romantic type and the husband was more of a no-nonsense guy. One afternoon the wife went out to meet a friend for coffee. She decided to send her husband a romantic text message and...

Wrong number he is not Mr. Vegan. This guy eats my type of meat, pussy meat.

Can share weal and woe , can share wife but cannot share girlfriends.

Two robbers once broke into a bank in Britain . Once inside the bank shortly after midnight, their efforts at disabling the security system got underway immediately. The robbers, who expected to find one or two large safes filled with cash & valuables, were surprised to see hundreds of smaller...

This post will soon be inducted into the hall of fame in the 'not blue pill ' thread.

A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. Playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he looked up and said, "Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend now that Grandpa's gone to heaven?" Grandma replied, "Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit in my...

Good advice for her 1. MILKING IT: When stroking a guy's dick don't grab it like a bus rail and start jerking it like you were milking a cow. Don't use the love sword as if it's a piece of gym equipment to strengthen the forearms. The male organ is a thing of wonder and beauty, and should...

My pinkies are pink ....wonder why :p

Best joke of May 2014. Even my avatar is tickled pink. Ang Wei Neng, MP for Jurong GRC, suggested that the Ministry of Education should send Singaporeans on compulsory trips to poor communities in neighbouring countries in order to show them how lucky they are to live in Singapore. Mr Ang...

Life is like a penis - simple, relaxed and hanging free ... it's women who make it hard.

Grandpa and Grandma were visiting the kids overnight, when Grandpa found two bottles of MALE DRIVE® in his son's medicine cabinet. He asked his grandson about taking the pills, and his grandson said, "I don't think you should take one; they work extremely well and very fast!" "How...

he can be incocknito ...i'll lend him my prick.

Please spare a thought for the man who told his wife he was going on a business trip to China on that Malaysian Airlines Flight No MH. 370, and now can't come out of his girlfriend's apartment.

thanks for the compliments .