- Joined
- Jul 10, 2008
- Messages
- 65,559
- Points
- 113
100 English Euphemisms
1. A bit worse for wear – Drink.
2. A little thin on top – Bald.
3. Adult beverages – Hard drinks like beer and wine.
4. Adult content – Pornography.
5. Adult entertainment – Media content that contains some sexually explicit material.
6. American murder log – Alligators.
7. Arm knee – Elbow.
8. Armed intervention – Military attack.
9. Backed up worse than the Hoover Dam – Be constipated.
10. Be economical with the truth – Tell a lie.
11. Be made redundant – Be fired.
12. Be on a gardening leave – Unemployed.
13. Be put to sleep – Euthanized.
14. Be shooting blanks – Sterile.
15. Be wearing your apron high – Pregnant.
16. Between jobs – Unemployed.
17. Big boned – Fat.
18. Body flower – Cemetery.
19. Break wind – Fart.
20. Built for comfort, not for speed – Fat.
21. Butt table – Chair.
22. Change into your brown trousers – To suddenly empty your bowels out of fear.
23. Chronologically challenged – Late.
24. Clone the mammoth – Make futile efforts.
25. Collateral damage – Accidental death.
26. Comfort woman – Prostitute.
27. Commit a terminological inexactitude – Tell a lie.
28. Compressed horse – A pony.
29. Correctional facility – Prison.
30. Cross over to the other side – Die.
31. Dinner spades – Utensils.
32. Do your business/Empty your bowels – Defecate.
33. Don the fedora – Temporarily step out of your fashion comfort zone.
34. Don’t suffer fools gladly – Be kind of rude.
35. Early retirement – Used to describe getting fired, especially for older people.
36. Earth sauce – Lava.
37. Economically depressed neighborhood – Slum.
38. Embarking on a journey of self-discovery – Jobless.
39. Engage in safe sex – Female masturbation.
40. Enhanced interrogation methods – Torture by the police during the investigations.
41. Ethnic cleansing – Genocide.
42. Financially challenged – Poor or broke.
43. Finger pants – Gloves.
44. Food rakes – Forks.
45. Friendly fire – When an action (especially military action), criticism, or statement accidentally targets a person on the friendly as opposed to opponent’s side.
46. Full and frank discussion – Drunk.
47. Genuine imitation leather – 100% virgin cheesy vinyl.
48. Get a career change – Be fired.
49. Get your leg over – Have sex.
50. Getting on – Growing old.
51. Good bad words – Euphemisms.
52. Hairy nope nope – Spider.
53. Help the police with investigations – Be tortured to tell the police what you know about a crime.
54. High from above – Used to describe a short dress or skirt.
55. Hire a Russian – Find someone else to deal with a pesky problem.
56. Horizontal gymnastics – Used to describe having sex.
57. Horizontally challenged – Fat.
58. Human raccoons – Younger siblings (especially brothers).
59. In between the ears and above the neck – Used to describe how intelligent a person is. For instance, you can say “He’s not very well-endowed in between the ears and above the neck.”
60. In the club – Pregnant.
61. Intellectually challenged – Stupid.
62. Intelligent ventilation points – The armholes in a piece of clothing.
63. Kick the bucket – Die.
64. Knocking shop – Brothel.
65. Leave a lot to be desired – Not good enough.
66. Leg wrist – Ankle.
67. Lose somebody – Have them die, especially when they were under your care.
68. Lose your lunch – Vomit.
69. Lose your marbles – Suffer a mental illness.
70. Making the bald man cry – Male masturbation.
71. Managing company stakeholders – Bribing.
72. Meet your maker – Die.
73. Negative patient outcome – Death.
74. Neutralized – (Of a geographical area) the army or police has killed people there.
75. Nose flavors – Smells.
76. Not the sharpest pencil in the box – Somewhat stupid.
77. Not up to scratch – Not good enough.
78. On the streets – Homeless.
79. One-eyed puff adder – The male genitals.
80. Over the hill and picking up speed – Old.
81. Partially proficient – Not very qualified.
82. Postmenopausal/Senior – Very old.
83. Pre-enjoyed vehicle – Used car.
84. Relocation center – Prison camp.
85. Restricted growth – Short.
86. Reverse floor – Ceiling.
87. Self-service – Masturbation.
88. Slithery tube dude – Snake.
89. Spend the penny/Squeeze the lemon – Use the washroom.
90. Stay on the tractor – Enjoy your post-retirement life.
91. Temporary negative cash flow – Broke.
92. Terminate a pregnancy – Abort.
93. Thatched ATM – The female genitals.
94. Tired and over-emotional – Drunk.
95. Turn a trick – Practice prostitution.
96. Turn to dust – Die.
97. Underperforming assets – Bad debts.
98. Vertically challenged – Short.
99. Well-fed – Fat.
100. Workforce imbalance correction – Retrenchment.
