My Eulogy

[blueRad]

My ideal burial method would be cremation and have my ashes scattered. Gives me the feeling of omnipresent.

 

[Claire]

Why the need for a eulogy?

Why can't you just slip away quietly without any fuss?

Good morning Mr Leong. I want to slip away without any fuss. Hopefully I can but I will not be physically around to ensure that.

I hate wakes. I hate funerals. They all glorify a dead body. Those who are alive probably do not know how I have led my life. Which I why I don't want them to write and read their eulogies. If there is a need to read one, I want my own words to be read, even if I am lying there, motionless, not breathing and without a heart beat.

 

[JohnTan]

Good morning Mr Leong. I want to slip away without any fuss. Hopefully I can but I will not be physically around to ensure that.

I hate wakes. I hate funerals. They all glorify a dead body. Those who are alive probably do not know how I have led my life. Which I why I don't want them to write and read their eulogies. If there is a need to read one, I want my own words to be read, even if I am lying there, motionless, not breathing and without a heart beat.

When you are dead, it doesn't matter what you hated when you were alive. There will be a wake because it matters more to those who are still alive. It's a time for them to pay their respects, follow some customs and also a time to meet up with some old friends and relatives.

 

[Claire]

When you are dead, it doesn't matter what you hated when you were alive. There will be a wake because it matters more to those who are still alive. It's a time for them to pay their respects, follow some customs and also a time to meet up with some old friends and relatives.

Morning John.

I need no one to pay their "respects". I have led my own life, not them. I dislike all those customary stuff as it inhibits me. Worse, the endless chatting by so called friends and relatives will surely irritate me.

 

[JohnTan]

Morning John.

I need no one to pay their "respects". I have led my own life, not them. I dislike all those customary stuff as it inhibits me. Worse, the endless chatting by so called friends and relatives will surely irritate me.

Morning Claire.

Like what I said earlier, the paying of respects is not for you after you are deceased. It is for those paying the respects, for them to feel more at peace with themselves and to reflect what sort of influence you have been in their lives. You are already dead, so whether they pay respects to you or feed your corpse to the dogs, it wouldn't matter at all from your perspective.

The thing is, if you have been a positive influence in someone's life, they will want to come and pay respect. Again, it is something decent people do naturally. If you played absolutely no positive role at all, people will naturally not come to pay their respects at all. They would have better things to do. So, telling them not to come is pointless since they won't come in the first place.

At a funeral, whatever happens is meant for the living. The dead can't be irritated because they are already dead.

 

[Claire]

Morning Claire.

Like what I said earlier, the paying of respects is not for you after you are deceased. It is for those paying the respects, for them to feel more at peace with themselves and to reflect what sort of influence you have been in their lives. You are already dead, so whether they pay respects to you or feed your corpse to the dogs, it wouldn't matter at all from your perspective.

The thing is, if you have been a positive influence in someone's life, they will want to come and pay respect. Again, it is something decent people do naturally. If you played absolutely no positive role at all, people will naturally not come to pay their respects at all. They would have better things to do. So, telling them not to come is pointless since they won't come in the first place.

At a funeral, whatever happens is meant for the living. The dead can't be irritated because they are already dead.

John, I guess I can agree to disagree with your views.

I have no wish for the living to congregate over my dead body whatsoever for their own partake. I live my life and I am responsible for what to the point when my flesh meets the fiery chamber.

 

[JohnTan]

John, I guess I can agree to disagree with your views.

I have no wish for the living to congregate over my dead body whatsoever for their own partake. I live my life and I am responsible for what to the point when my flesh meets the fiery chamber.

Well, if you don't wish for the living to congregate over your dead body, then my advice would be to play a minimal, unimportant role in their lives. They would automatically stay away from your funeral. In the meanwhile, enjoy what's left of the weekend.

 

[Thick Face Black Heart]

On this day, Saturday, 16 January 2016, I decide that I will write my own Eulogy.

When others read their eulogies at the parlour, I find them distastefully false of the person lying in the wake. Exaggeration are overstatements filled the funeral hall. Tears roll, albeit erroneously as the eulogists are often “cannon-fairying” about the deceased.

Claire

I have always known that I will die alone.

 

[Thick Face Black Heart]

Why the need for a eulogy?

Why can't you just slip away quietly without any fuss?

Agree.

When I go, I will go alone, and no one in the world will notice. That's the way I will leave.

 

[tictactoe]

Morning John.

I need no one to pay their "respects". I have led my own life, not them. I dislike all those customary stuff as it inhibits me. Worse, the endless chatting by so called friends and relatives will surely irritate me.

Morning Claire.

Morning fcuk buddies How are both your dicks?

 

[Claire]

I have always known that I will die alone.

Afternoon Thick. I am trying to get out of this morbid mode. You must too. Stay safe and healthy.

 

[Claire]

Well, if you don't wish for the living to congregate over your dead body, then my advice would be to play a minimal, unimportant role in their lives. They would automatically stay away from your funeral. In the meanwhile, enjoy what's left of the weekend.

Thanks John. i will enjoy what's left of the weekend.

 

[JohnTan]

Agree.

When I go, I will go alone, and no one in the world will notice. That's the way I will leave.

If you are nobody's role model, good mentor, good friend, devoted parent, filial child, community volunteer, etc etc, then I guarantee you nobody would notice you when you go.

 

[extramarital]

Bro, we share the same thinking. I dislike the idea of a wake, especially the Chinese type of wake and funeral procession, wearing of Chinese mourning clothes etc.

Most people reading this forum won't have the luxury of having their wakes and funerals when they die unless they are now in their 70's, 80's or older. WW III is much closer than most people realize which means global nuclear war will wipe out most of humanity turning once thriving metropolis into radioactive dumps.

 

[extramarital]

Good morning Mr Leong. I want to slip away without any fuss. Hopefully I can but I will not be physically around to ensure that.

I hate wakes. I hate funerals. They all glorify a dead body. Those who are alive probably do not know how I have led my life. Which I why I don't want them to write and read their eulogies. If there is a need to read one, I want my own words to be read, even if I am lying there, motionless, not breathing and without a heart beat.

Don’t worry Claire. WW 3 is much closer than most people realize. Most people reading this forum will be wiped out instantly by nuclear warheads without having to worry about their wakes and funerals, let alone their eulogies.

I myself don’t expect to have a wake and funeral when I pass away because my living flesh will instantly turn into ashes when the nuclear missile hits the city where I’m living.

 

[bigboss]

....All of us will have to lie down ~ be it sooner or later....

...but someone had once proclaimed that he would get up when he was lowered to his grave. You might want to lie down but to some people, lying down is not in their vocabulary.

 

[bigboss]

i'll most likely do not have a tombstone, but if there is one, it's epitaph will read..."eat, shit, and die."

If your tombstone could be written this way, then for someone else, it should have been written it if given the option ..."if you lowered me to this grave, I would still get up...so don't fuck around thinking I am gone ..."

 

[bigboss]

..No idea how's the Indian one...

They burn their dead in fire .. funeral pyre ... they like to see fire. That is why they set the mata mata cars on fire when rioting in Little India .. lots of fire like their funeral pyre ..

 

[virus]

sister, mine will be short and simple. but whoever survives me will have to hire a few american native tribes people all dressed up in tribe costumes to perform a short ensemble. they will sing my eulogy. it will be sung in a cryptic language the attendees will have to decipher. it will go....."wha yah jah kya ai am." :o

wat a let down... i was expecting you to get the sisters from strip dance joint to participate in full birthday suits and taking turns to do lap dance and blow job over your corpse. hopefully, the sexcitement will be enough to resurrect your soul n bring you back from the grip holes of 71 virgins.

 

[Leongsam]

I'm dying. The end is near. It has been a fantastic ride thus far.......