So as you probably have guessed from the title or my twitter, I am pregnant!!!
I am writing this blog entry on the 16th of August right now, 7 days after I first found out on freaking National Day!! My baby may be the first Eurasian Prime Minister in future!
You are probably wondering why this is published so much later then. It is because we Chinese are superstitious and believe that pregnancies should only be announced after the first trimester (first 3 months).
When I first heard this I was like WTF that's so damn stupid coz it means I get 3 months less of attention plus I have to keep that huge a secret for so long???
But as it turns out this is for good reason. Statistics show that a startling amount of pregnancies, one out of five, do not survive the first 3 months!! I KNOW RIGHT? Since there is a 20% chance of an empty promise, I too have decided not to announce it coz I don't think I can stand the pitiful looks people are going to give me... *choy* I did tell most of my friends and relatives though!
So if you are reading this, it means I have entered my second trimester! (Postnote: Am now 11 weeks and 2 days - Decided to announce on Mike's birthday instead of at my full 12 weeks coz doctor said everything is stable and I can announce anytime I want actually)
I have decided to periodically fill in this blog entry with my thoughts all the way until my 3rd month since I can't say anything till then.
Back story... Back in end 2011 I had these raging maternal instincts and Mike and I decided to try for a baby. We usually use the withdrawal method (too much info? LOL) but for 2 months, we just decided to go for it.
Nothing happened. Single line.
Seriously I thought it was really easy to get pregnant so I thought that there must be something wrong with our machinery. Although I've heard of people trying for as long as 5 years before succeeding, I never thought it will happen to us? Plus, there is no way to find out if your parts are working until you actually do get pregnant, right?
After that I got igloo on October 13th and he completely stopped the crazy maternal instincts. I lifted my baby tinted glasses and decided that since so much work and money is going into our house's renovations, I wanted to enjoy it for about a year before trying so the place won't have to turn into puke plastered toyland.
Sometime in mid july after I got back from Audrey's hen's night, thanks to the conversation we had then (too dirty to be repeated here), Mike and I decided to just recklessly go for it... Just that once. Bobo if you are reading this you are partially responsible for my pregnancy!
Not because we wanted a baby but because as I said I thought our machinery were broken anyway.
Then I tested on August 2nd because that was when my period was due. BTW I am the sort of person who hates the unknown and will test for pregnancy the moment I am supposed to get my period. Also because I love buying super cheap pregnancy test kits... Did you know mustafa has them for like $2?? I bought like 6.
So the test kit turned out negative. I went on with the belief that there was something wrong with us.
By the 9th I still haven't got my period so I tested again...
How was my reaction?
When I peed on the kit all I thought was "What the hell is wrong with my period, coming so late making me waste 2 test kits this freaking month. I need to go to mustafa again to buy more cheapo test kits, hope they are not sold out." so you can imagine I was totally expecting a negative again. But when I saw the clear double lines I freaked out.
I yelled a "WHAT THE FUCK???" in the toilet and hyperventilated, thinking about how my career is over and how my life will change completely and how my house is going to turn into puke plastered toyland. And how it is so tragic that I was skinny for such a short time. It's like I'm destined to be fat.
(Everyone has fears about having a kid ok and yes these are self centered thoughts but it didn't mean that I'm gonna be a bad mom when the baby comes out!)
Then I took the kit gingerly into the room and told Mike. I had an ashened face so I think he thought someone died when I told him "Baby I got something to tell you."
I wish I could say that he was extremely happy and twirled me around saying he is so happy to be a father but he didn't. Mike is not the very child-loving sort and he is an extreme worrywart. His thoughts usually go to the negative and he is scared of not having enough money or time for the kid or how it will affect our marriage etc.
But we have discussed babies for a while now and he has been mentally preparing himself for one coz he is knows he is 31 and it is time. If it happens he accepts it and wishes for the best but if it doesn't, well when we worry one less day.
So he just gave me a weak smile and hugged me for a long time.
Honestly even though it is OUR baby he wasn't the one I was eager to tell. My mother and friends are way more looking forward to the news. Rightfully so I guess coz it isn't their responsibility. LOL
So at 2am I called Momo who was sleeping. She of course started squealing about being a grandma and my spirits lifted. Pregnancy is a scary thing but if everyone is so happy for me it can't be that bad right?
Next I called my bff Shuyin who likewise also started yelling in her high pitched voice saying she has waited so long for this.
Then I told Qiu who was the only one still awake at 2am (and also she's mad about babies) and whatsapped the rest of my girlfriends. Junne told me she read the message on the way to work next morning and she stopped mid walk, screamed a little and started smiling like an idiot lol. It is such a nice feeling to have everyone so happy for me!! Everyone is showing me so much love!!
I badly wanted a friend to be pregnant with me so I started telling everyone to have more sex lol.
After this I spent the night searching for cute baby girl pictures and forming them as a college for my computer wallpaper. My preference is pretty obvious. Even though my irritating bio-freak friend Shengrong keeps telling me the gender is already decided via the X or Y chromosome in the sperm, I refuse to believe by sheer willpower I cannot change the sex of the kid.
It is Schrodinger's cat at the moment.
ANYWAY. I know mothers to be are always being so annoying saying that they don't care about the gender of the kid and will love it equally and as long as it is healthy blah blah.
But nobody said you can only wish for one thing for your baby and if you didn't choose health you are an asshole yeah? I don't wanna turn into one of those politically correct holistic birth judgmental self righteous sort of moms!
So I have an unorthodox preference for my kid's gender because hell yes I'm gonna be damn sad if I go into HnM to buy baby boy clothes and can't buy all the tutu skirts. If you are a mother, don't pretend you didn't have a preference however slight!
Besides, Mike's family has a very, very strong history of producing male babies. His grandma had 3 sons. 1 of the sons (Mike's dad) had FOUR boys, the other son had 2 boys, and the other son had 1 boy and 2 girls (I have hope).
Two of Mike's male cousins have 3 boys and no girls either.
So yes judge me... I know this baby is probably going to be a boy so I want to get a girl first to get this worry out of the way! Now Mike is saying he only wants 1 kid!! LIKE THIS HOW IF IT'S A BOY I CANNOT BUY TUTUS!! Will I get lynched if I say I also have always dreamed of getting the Juicy Couture pram?
Plus my baby room is already painted pink!! Please lah lao tian ye I don't wish for much.
Of course if it is a boy I will still love him but I'll just be slightly happier if it's a girl lah!! Son, if you are reading this in the future, I love you very much ok? :P
I'm expecting loads of comments from people saying a monster like me shouldn't breed and that babies are not accessories but fuck off please. Go judge your own birth thanks. I'm trying my best to reduce my use of vulgarities (I can't go cold turkey) but really, judgmental mom sorts are the WORST!!!
Have you seen their snotty faces when people tell them they are going for caesarean or not gonna breast feed? URGH!! There is not only ONE method of caring for a kid and as long as the expectant mother isn't smoking or drinking the choices they make are none of your business!
Oh gosh this entry is turning out to be really long. I'd also like to say that my boobs are HUGE now. HUGE! Largest they have ever been. I think I went from a small B to a C!!
----- i give up copying----------
I am writing this blog entry on the 16th of August right now, 7 days after I first found out on freaking National Day!! My baby may be the first Eurasian Prime Minister in future!
You are probably wondering why this is published so much later then. It is because we Chinese are superstitious and believe that pregnancies should only be announced after the first trimester (first 3 months).
When I first heard this I was like WTF that's so damn stupid coz it means I get 3 months less of attention plus I have to keep that huge a secret for so long???
But as it turns out this is for good reason. Statistics show that a startling amount of pregnancies, one out of five, do not survive the first 3 months!! I KNOW RIGHT? Since there is a 20% chance of an empty promise, I too have decided not to announce it coz I don't think I can stand the pitiful looks people are going to give me... *choy* I did tell most of my friends and relatives though!
So if you are reading this, it means I have entered my second trimester! (Postnote: Am now 11 weeks and 2 days - Decided to announce on Mike's birthday instead of at my full 12 weeks coz doctor said everything is stable and I can announce anytime I want actually)
I have decided to periodically fill in this blog entry with my thoughts all the way until my 3rd month since I can't say anything till then.
Back story... Back in end 2011 I had these raging maternal instincts and Mike and I decided to try for a baby. We usually use the withdrawal method (too much info? LOL) but for 2 months, we just decided to go for it.
Nothing happened. Single line.
Seriously I thought it was really easy to get pregnant so I thought that there must be something wrong with our machinery. Although I've heard of people trying for as long as 5 years before succeeding, I never thought it will happen to us? Plus, there is no way to find out if your parts are working until you actually do get pregnant, right?
After that I got igloo on October 13th and he completely stopped the crazy maternal instincts. I lifted my baby tinted glasses and decided that since so much work and money is going into our house's renovations, I wanted to enjoy it for about a year before trying so the place won't have to turn into puke plastered toyland.
Sometime in mid july after I got back from Audrey's hen's night, thanks to the conversation we had then (too dirty to be repeated here), Mike and I decided to just recklessly go for it... Just that once. Bobo if you are reading this you are partially responsible for my pregnancy!
Not because we wanted a baby but because as I said I thought our machinery were broken anyway.
Then I tested on August 2nd because that was when my period was due. BTW I am the sort of person who hates the unknown and will test for pregnancy the moment I am supposed to get my period. Also because I love buying super cheap pregnancy test kits... Did you know mustafa has them for like $2?? I bought like 6.
So the test kit turned out negative. I went on with the belief that there was something wrong with us.
By the 9th I still haven't got my period so I tested again...
How was my reaction?
When I peed on the kit all I thought was "What the hell is wrong with my period, coming so late making me waste 2 test kits this freaking month. I need to go to mustafa again to buy more cheapo test kits, hope they are not sold out." so you can imagine I was totally expecting a negative again. But when I saw the clear double lines I freaked out.
I yelled a "WHAT THE FUCK???" in the toilet and hyperventilated, thinking about how my career is over and how my life will change completely and how my house is going to turn into puke plastered toyland. And how it is so tragic that I was skinny for such a short time. It's like I'm destined to be fat.
(Everyone has fears about having a kid ok and yes these are self centered thoughts but it didn't mean that I'm gonna be a bad mom when the baby comes out!)
Then I took the kit gingerly into the room and told Mike. I had an ashened face so I think he thought someone died when I told him "Baby I got something to tell you."
I wish I could say that he was extremely happy and twirled me around saying he is so happy to be a father but he didn't. Mike is not the very child-loving sort and he is an extreme worrywart. His thoughts usually go to the negative and he is scared of not having enough money or time for the kid or how it will affect our marriage etc.
But we have discussed babies for a while now and he has been mentally preparing himself for one coz he is knows he is 31 and it is time. If it happens he accepts it and wishes for the best but if it doesn't, well when we worry one less day.
So he just gave me a weak smile and hugged me for a long time.
Honestly even though it is OUR baby he wasn't the one I was eager to tell. My mother and friends are way more looking forward to the news. Rightfully so I guess coz it isn't their responsibility. LOL
So at 2am I called Momo who was sleeping. She of course started squealing about being a grandma and my spirits lifted. Pregnancy is a scary thing but if everyone is so happy for me it can't be that bad right?
Next I called my bff Shuyin who likewise also started yelling in her high pitched voice saying she has waited so long for this.
Then I told Qiu who was the only one still awake at 2am (and also she's mad about babies) and whatsapped the rest of my girlfriends. Junne told me she read the message on the way to work next morning and she stopped mid walk, screamed a little and started smiling like an idiot lol. It is such a nice feeling to have everyone so happy for me!! Everyone is showing me so much love!!
I badly wanted a friend to be pregnant with me so I started telling everyone to have more sex lol.
After this I spent the night searching for cute baby girl pictures and forming them as a college for my computer wallpaper. My preference is pretty obvious. Even though my irritating bio-freak friend Shengrong keeps telling me the gender is already decided via the X or Y chromosome in the sperm, I refuse to believe by sheer willpower I cannot change the sex of the kid.
It is Schrodinger's cat at the moment.
ANYWAY. I know mothers to be are always being so annoying saying that they don't care about the gender of the kid and will love it equally and as long as it is healthy blah blah.
But nobody said you can only wish for one thing for your baby and if you didn't choose health you are an asshole yeah? I don't wanna turn into one of those politically correct holistic birth judgmental self righteous sort of moms!
So I have an unorthodox preference for my kid's gender because hell yes I'm gonna be damn sad if I go into HnM to buy baby boy clothes and can't buy all the tutu skirts. If you are a mother, don't pretend you didn't have a preference however slight!
Besides, Mike's family has a very, very strong history of producing male babies. His grandma had 3 sons. 1 of the sons (Mike's dad) had FOUR boys, the other son had 2 boys, and the other son had 1 boy and 2 girls (I have hope).
Two of Mike's male cousins have 3 boys and no girls either.
So yes judge me... I know this baby is probably going to be a boy so I want to get a girl first to get this worry out of the way! Now Mike is saying he only wants 1 kid!! LIKE THIS HOW IF IT'S A BOY I CANNOT BUY TUTUS!! Will I get lynched if I say I also have always dreamed of getting the Juicy Couture pram?
Plus my baby room is already painted pink!! Please lah lao tian ye I don't wish for much.
Of course if it is a boy I will still love him but I'll just be slightly happier if it's a girl lah!! Son, if you are reading this in the future, I love you very much ok? :P
I'm expecting loads of comments from people saying a monster like me shouldn't breed and that babies are not accessories but fuck off please. Go judge your own birth thanks. I'm trying my best to reduce my use of vulgarities (I can't go cold turkey) but really, judgmental mom sorts are the WORST!!!
Have you seen their snotty faces when people tell them they are going for caesarean or not gonna breast feed? URGH!! There is not only ONE method of caring for a kid and as long as the expectant mother isn't smoking or drinking the choices they make are none of your business!
Oh gosh this entry is turning out to be really long. I'd also like to say that my boobs are HUGE now. HUGE! Largest they have ever been. I think I went from a small B to a C!!
----- i give up copying----------
