Buddhist texts traditionally list the five disturbing emotions beginning with attachment and then move on to aggression, stupidity, jealousy, and arrogance. But here I’d like to start with jealousy because it is the most obvious, ridiculous, and embarrassing of all the emotions, which makes it easier to overcome. If we practice working with jealousy first, we will have more confidence in working with the subtlety of the other emotions later. The jealous mind wants what others have, be it physical attributes, wealth, intelligence, someone else’s spouse, their job, status, spiritual accomplishments, and so on. Because it focuses on what it doesn’t have, it feels impoverished and discontented all the time. When we are possessed by jealousy, it is as if something were lacking in our very existence—something that someone else has. Jealousy is a comparative dynamic that causes us to resent others. We resent their positive attributes and continually search for their weaknesses: “Why do they possess those attributes that should belong to me!” “The jealous mind is gross and obvious. Not only do we lose respect for ourselves when we feel jealous, but everyone else loses respect for us too. We feel exposed like a worm whose rock has been overturned. As much as we want to hide, we lose face. In this way, the grossness of jealousy has some value—nothing is hidden, so we can see it and then try to overcome it… Or at least have a good laugh
