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The standard of 154th's Engrish

Hypocrisy

Alfrescian
Loyal
http://business.asiaone.com/news/800000-hdb-households-receive-45m-worth-gst-vouchers


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LITTLEREDDOT

Alfrescian (Inf)
Asset
Must also include the standard of PAP MP's Engrish.

Poet-playwright Alfian Sa’at points out the wisdom of MP Tin Pei Ling

September 29, 2014
This is classic.
<figure class="fl" style="padding: 0px; margin: 0px 15px 0px 0px; float: left;"> </figure>Belmont Lay




Just as it seems the tide might be turning in Marine Parade MP Tin Pei Ling’s favour, she capsizes her own boat.

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Local poet-playwright, Alfian Sa’at, who likes to shed new light by taking things apart and putting them together again, has put up a Facebook post compiling a list that chronicles Tin’s language prowess, platitudes and truisms.

For example, Tin — in classic Tin Pei Ling fashion — called a senior resident in her ward a “centurion” instead of “centenarian”.

All this comes in the midst of a media blitz in recent months, where the mainstream media has been trying very hard torehabilitate Tin’s image. Since the run-up to the General Election 2011, Tin has been on the receiving end of taunts and insults after she committed a series of faux pas that continues to make it difficult to take her seriously.

She was recently granted a lengthy interview in the usually turgid Straits Times Supper Club section, where politicians and current news makers are invited to talk about nothing in particular and are rarely amusing.


Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong even went out of his way to praise Tin as the light of the world for MacPherson residents.


However, it appears some of that effort might have gone to waste.

Here is Alfian Sa’at’s incisive breakdown of Tin’s language use or misuse, pointlessness and platitudes:

The Selected Wisdom of Tin Pei Ling
-------------------------------------------------

When Tin Pei Ling first entered Parliament, quite a few people had doubts over her capabilities. It did not help that videos showed her stomping her feet and wailing ‘I don’t know what to say!’ or delivering her campaign speech with the expressive hand gestures of someone at a primary school storytelling competition. But she has definitely matured over the past few years. Now she knows what to say, and she says it in her inimitable style. Here are some highlights from her Facebook page:

1) She mixes up words endearingly:

“Mr K------ could well be a centurion in MacPherson (!) but it is hard to verify this now as documentations were not as accurate or well organised in the past.”

(Centurion=a commander in the ancient Roman Army; centenarian=someone who is 100 years old. I would put three exclamation marks there if that were the case.)

2) She likes puns, and likes to explain that they are puns:


“Many residents, especially the elderly, tend to cross the road here and we have been very concerned about their safety. So, after several persistent appeals from my grassroots team and I, we finally got the "green light" (pun intended) from the LTA.”


“Community partners came together earlier this month to install new LED energy-saving lightbulbs for households in one of the rental blocks in MacPherson. Heartfelt thanks to all who were involved - THANK YOU for bringing light (figuratively and literally) to our residents!”


“Nevertheless, 2012 has been a strikingly (pun intended…) momentous year with headlines grabbing attention throughout the year.


“We cannot be a careless and care-less meritocracy.”


“I have utmost respect for Mr Lee, our founding Prime Minister. I wish him good health and happiness. To me, he is our rock and he rocks *figuratively*!”


3) She uses Maggi Mee to illustrate a point about defence policy:

“Diplomacy without defence is merely a good show (good to watch and very good to “eat”). Any talk of freedom is empty if we cannot even assure our sovereignty.”

4) She uses adjectives unconventionally. Here she compares Tharman Shanmugaratnam to Marvin Gaye:

“Budget 2014 is one that I would describe as “soulful” (*not the sad kind*).”

5) She likes stringing modal verbs together to motivational effect:

“We as younger Singaporeans must build upon what our pioneers have given us and do them proud! We can, we must, we will.”

“It is my fervent fervent hope that we, all of us as Singaporeans, will continue to stand united, love and defend this country we call home. We did, we can and we will.”

6) Not enough motivation? You can print these out and laminate to stick on your office cubicle/pantry. Please remember to credit:

“Please be careful and take care of our common spaces, protect yourself, protect your family too. Life is too precious!”

“When the goal is clear, it is as if an invisible force is driving us forward, giving us strength to strive for that goal.”

“How important it is for us to cherish what we have, while we still can. We only live once.”

“Together, we can make the values of a caring and inclusive society come alive. Together, we can make a positive difference.”

“Let us look out for each other and live up to the human spirit!”

7) She is Captain Obvious, or rather Brigadier-General Redundant:

“Nothing beats having good health because having good health will enable us to have the capacity and energy to enjoy life, fulfill aspirations and do what is meaningful to us in life.”

“Milk is a critical source of nutrients for infants and young kids. For young kids who are still growing, they need the right nutrients to develop their brain and body.”

“Courage – something that we all need at some point in life, to overcome particular tribulations or achieve personal breakthroughs.”

“Finally, I would like to conclude.”

8 ) She likes fillers, as if she is trying to achieve a minimum word count:

“It shows that our nation cares, our generation cares and we all care.”
(How about “It shows we all care”?)

“No one gets left out, everyone gets a chance to tap on [Medishield], if not today then tomorrow.”
(How about “No one gets left out”?)

9) She comes up with head-scratching slogans:

“We should work towards a clean Singapore, not a cleaned Singapore.”
(How does one get a clean Singapore, if it is not cleaned first, even if what she means is we should clean up after ourselves?)

10) She can cram a lot of civil-service jargon in a single sentence:

“The Government may even have to take on a bigger role in conducting horizon scanning of best practices and innovations, and share them proactively with the SMEs.”

11) She quotes from National Day songs to get her points across:

“Finally, during this National Day period, let us remember how we got to where we are today - with the government and the people working hand-in-hand to build our nation, where we are strong and free.”
(We built a nation/ Strong and free/Reaching out together/ For peace and harmony. ‘We Are Singapore,’ 1987)

12) She oversees projects with witty names:

“Say No To Fall”—nothing to do with celebrating Spring for as long as possible, but ‘aimed at reducing the risk of elderly residents falling, building their confidence and supporting active ageing’.

“Project GRACE”—a public art project, otherwise known as ‘Getting Residents, Artists & the Community Engaged’.

“Project Angelz”—where youth volunteers help to spruce up old residents’ homes. Of course the ‘z’ is there because it’s a youth thang yo, like ‘Boyz ‘N the Hood’.

13) Cryptic, pseudo-profound, or nonsense? You decide:

“We want to be dreamers of the day, not just the night.”

“What is the promise of youth and to youths?”

“They may have lost their sight, something that we sometimes take for granted, but they are not blind.”

14) And finally, this analogy:

“Some SMEs are in sectors where you simply cannot mechanise tasks. For example, you cannot simply create standard pre-mixes for machines to whip up delicious dishes. It is like having r
obots to read out lines in a drama play. I am sure they can do so competently, but the feeling is just not the same.”
Of course, we could replace Tin Pei Ling with a robot that is programmed to say ‘jiayou’ or ‘kudos to our volunteers’ every hour, with ‘From Third World to First’ and ‘Chicken Soup for the Soul’ downloaded into its brain, reliably exuding sincerity and banality. But the feeling will not be the same.

http://mothership.sg/2014/09/poet-playwright-alfian-saat-points-out-the-wisdom-of-mp-tin-pei-ling/
 
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ByTheWay

Alfrescian (Inf)
Asset

LITTLEREDDOT

Alfrescian (Inf)
Asset
154th reported that "he" crashed into the back of a stationary bus...."he" rammed onto the back of an SBS Transit bus....and "he" hit the off-service bus.

Wah, is the man made of steel? Shouldn't it be "he crashed the car", "he rammed the car" and "his car hit the off-service bus"?


Published on Jun 03, 2015
Man's gets fine, driving ban for inconsiderate driving which killed toddler
By Elena Chong
alfred030615e.jpg

SINGAPORE - A man whose 11/2-year-old daughter died after he crashed into the back of a stationary bus was fined $800 and banned from driving for three months on Wednesday.

Alfred Ng Hon Lum, 30, admitted to driving without reasonable consideration along the Central Expressway (CTE) on Sept 22 last year. He failed to keep a proper lookout ahead and rammed onto the back of an SBS Transit bus which was parked on the left lane of the slip road into Ang Mo Kio Avenue 3 with its hazard lights on.


A traffic court heard that Ng was driving his Nissan Latio car on the extreme left of the four-lane CTE with his wife and daughter, who was unwell. They were on their way home after treatment at KK Women's and Children's Hospital.


As he approached the slip road into Ang Mo Kio Avenue 3, he hit the off-service bus.

 

LITTLEREDDOT

Alfrescian (Inf)
Asset
Khoo Teck Puat, the person, got shot!!?? It should be Khoo Teck Puat Hospital.

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Khoo Teck Puat shooting: Former and current policemen on general procedures of drawing firearm


PUBLISHED ON JUN 23, 2015 8:46 AM
416900PRINTEMAIL



A police officer's holstered revolver. -- PHOTO: SHIN MIN DAILY NEWS







BY TEE ZHUO









SINGAPORE - The shooting incident at Khoo Teck Puat Hospital last Saturday has cast a spotlight on the circumstances, in general, under which police would draw and discharge their firearm.

Muhammad Iskandar Sa'at, 23, allegedly snatched the revolver of a police officer at the hospital, while in custody for an unrelated charge of motor vehicle theft.

He had allegedly tried to escape while in an examination room at the hospital. The suspect, a Singaporean, had complained about chest pain and was escorted to the hospital to seek medical attention.


In the struggle that ensued, three shots were fired and the 31-year-old policeman was wounded in his left thumb and right foot.


Muhammad Iskandar had allegedly fired three rounds from a .38 inch calibre Taurus revolver that belonged to policeman Mohammad Sadli Razali, with the intent to cause physical injury.

The suspect has been charged with a capital offence under the Arms Offences Act.


The Straits Times speaks to former and current police officers about the general procedures and considerations under which police draw their firearm:


1. Most police officers are issued with a .38 inch calibre Taurus revolver. The revolver comes with a five-chambered cylinder, and a "speed loader" which allows the user to reload all chambers quickly at the same time.


2. The revolver is housed in a tight moulded holster secured to the belt. Its design forces a user to draw the gun vertically, preventing the weapon from being snatched from behind the officer.


3. The gun's butt is also attached to the police officer's belt by an elastic rubber lanyard, which makes it difficult for the gun to be removed completely without the police officer's knowledge.


4. Before drawing the gun, the officer must first disengage a buckle positioned over the cocking hammer. The buckle prevents accidental firing while the gun is holstered, as the gun cannot load if the cocking hammer is not pulled back.


5. A strong and complete pull is needed to shoot successfully as a weak pull will merely cock the gun, but not fire the bullet.


6. Police officers can shoot when an assailant is armed, with the danger, ability and opportunity to seriously harm or kill. Verbal warnings need to be given before firing.

[email protected]


- See more at: http://www.straitstimes.com/news/si...-policemen-general-proce#sthash.GSmrhyuf.dpuf
 

tanwahtiu

Alfrescian
Loyal
now you know drug traffickers, the evil British English language sucks. when you deal with drugs this is what happen to your language as well, corrupt.

there is no need to have capital letter after full stop. cpommon sense logic thinker like Chinese (are the best) knows How to deal with language speaking or writing.

Fuck the fuck stop, comma and all shit thrown in in the Opium English language.
 

LITTLEREDDOT

Alfrescian (Inf)
Asset
Lousy reporting.

Reporter did not report the locations of the two accidents. The PIE is a long stretch of road, the accidents could have happened at Portsdown, Buona Vista, Clementi....

Reporter did not report the times of the two accidents. Readers have no clues when the accidents happened. Was it 6am, 9am or 11am?

Wrong grammar: "among the injured were a full-time national servicemen". Should be "serviceman".


Five injured in two accidents involving 19 cars on PIE


Nineteen cars were involved in two separate accidents on the PIE on Monday morning at around 7am.
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Chew Hui Min

SINGAPORE - Five people were injured in two multi-car pile ups on the Pan-Island Expressway (PIE) on Monday morning.
The two accidents happened at two separate locations on the PIE towards Tuas, causing a jam from the exit at Jurong West Avenue 2 to the Clementi Avenue 6 exit.


A Lianhe Wanbao reporter who was at the scene counted 11 vehicles in the second accident site, the paper reported. But according to police, there were eight vehicles at each location.


It is understood that some vehicles left the scene and 16 car owners made police reports.

Five people were conveyed to the National University Hospital, said the Singapore Civil Defence Force (SCDF), adding that one man refused to be taken to hospital.

An SCDF vehicle, which was responding to another incident, was also involved in one of the crashes.

Among the injured were a full-time national servicemen, a math professor and his wife, Wanbao reported.

The 23-year-old NSF, whose surname is Su, was on his way to Bukit Gombak camp in a taxi. He blacked out from the impact, and woke only when emergency responders knocked on the car window, he recounted.

The professor told Wanbao he was sending his son to the National Technological University to take part in a freshman initiation camp.

He had injuries on his right wrist, and his left ring finger was bleeding, while his wife felt pain in her ribs. Their son escaped unhurt as he was in the back seat and had his seatbelt on.

 
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LITTLEREDDOT

Alfrescian (Inf)
Asset
The injured man - was he the driver of the car, the tipper truck or a passer-by?

Accident causes massive jam in Bukit Batok


ST PHOTO: ALPHONSUS CHERN

JUL 4, 2015, 5:50 AM SGT
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A 27-year-old man was injured in a collision between a tipper truck and a car at the junction of Bukit Batok Road and Bukit Batok West Avenue 3 yesterday afternoon. He was taken, still conscious, to the National University Hospital. Police said they were alerted to the accident at around 3.45pm and are investigating the incident. No further details were given. Witnesses said the accident caused a traffic jam that stretched all the way to Jurong Town Hall Road, nearly a kilometre away.




 

blackmondy

Alfrescian (Inf)
Asset
Proofreading, like translation, is still one of the few jobs that can't be delegated to technology.

Authors who write books have to go through rounds of drafts, editing and proofreading before the book gets published.

SPH couldn't (or wouldn't) even get a simple article right. It should stick to the property business, dabble with shitty malls and office buildings. People who take and take and can't give back anything good to society are best suited for rent collection activities. :cool:

Brainwashing cannot be cheap....
 
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