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PAP says '' more good quality Ah nehs and Ah Tiongs'' comin to Spore...

zeddy

zeddy

Alfrescian (Inf)
Asset
Govt to continue to manage pace of immigration


Source:CNA/ac

SINGAPORE: The National Population and Talent Division said it will continue to manage the pace of immigration to ensure ensure immigrants are "assimilable, of good quality and can be well integrated into Singapore society".


Outlining its goals and plans for the next five years in response to the President's address on Monday, the division said immigration has helped address Singapore's declining fertility rate and also injected vibrancy into the economy and society :mad: :oIo:

But it said it will ensure that Singaporeans' sense of belonging and national identity remain strong.

. :oIo: :oIo:

The division, which comes under the Prime Minister's Office, said it will work with other government agencies to plan for social and physical infrastructure to match the needs of the population.

It will also continue to promote a pro-family environment as it understands that many Singaporeans still consider getting married, starting a family and having children as important life goals. It will also continue to support Singaporeans in realising these life goals.

The division also said it will continue to engage Singaporeans who are overseas so that they will stay connected to Singapore.
 
L

lianbeng

Alfrescian (Inf)
Asset
lianbeng still remembers them saying 100,000 more on the way liao leh.:biggrin:
 
Last edited:
Agoraphobic

Agoraphobic

Alfrescian
Loyal
zeddy said:
Govt to continue to manage pace of immigration
.................ensure immigrants are "assimilable, of good quality and can be well integrated into Singapore society..........................
Click to expand...



This part needs to be defined clearly.

".... can be well integrated into Singapore society...."

Speak Singlish?

Able to meld with the working class?

Pro PAP?

Cheers!
 
X

xenomorph

Alfrescian
Loyal
good quality means smart lor.


An Indian man walks into the New York City bank and asks for the loan officer.

He tells the Loan Officer that he was going to India for some business for 2 weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.

The Loan Officer tells him that the bank will need
Some form of security for the loan.

So the Indian man hands over the keys and the documents of the new Ferrari car parked on the street in front of the bank.

The loan officer consults the president of the bank,
Produces all the required items and everything check out to be OK.

The loan officer agrees to accept the car as a security for the loan.

The bank president and the Loan Officer had a good laugh at the Indian
For keeping a $750,000 Ferrari as a security and taking only $5,000 has a loan.

An employee of the bank then drives the Ferrari
Into the banks underground garage and parks it there.

Two weeks later the Indian returns and pays $5000 and the interest which comes to it $15.41.

Seeing this, loan officer says,

“Sir, we are very happy to have your business
And this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled.
While you are away, we checked you out and
Found out that you were a multi millionaire.

What puzzled us was why would you bother to borrow $5000?”

The Indian replies
"Where else in the New York City can I park my car for 2 weeks and
For only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return".
This is a true incident and the
Indian is none other than... "VIJAY MALLYA"
 
X

xenomorph

Alfrescian
Loyal
Once upon a time,Bt Timah Hill is overrun with monkeys, a good quality ah-neh appeared and announced to the people that he would buy monkeys for $10 each to be sold to India. The Singaporeans, seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to Bt Timah Hill, and started catching them.

The indian bought thousands at $10 and as supply started to diminish, they became harder to catch, so the Sinkees stopped their effort. The keling then announced that he would now pay $20 for each one.

This renewed the efforts of the people and they started catching monkeys again. But soon the supply diminished even further and they were ever harder to catch, so the people gave up.

The man increased his price to $25 each and the supply of monkeys became so sparse that it was an effort to even see a monkey, much less catch one.

The man now announced that he would buy monkeys for $50! However, since he had to go back to India on some business, his assistant ah-neh would now buy on his behalf.

While the man was away the assistant told the Sinkees.'Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has bought. I will sell them to you at $35 each and when the man returns from india, you can sell them to him for $50 each.'

The ah paks in the group quickly rounded up all their CPF savings and bought all the monkeys. They never saw the ah-neh nor his assistant again and once again there were monkeys in Bt Timah Hill.
 
P

psy83

Alfrescian
Loyal
xenomorph said:
good quality means smart lor.


An Indian man walks into the New York City bank and asks for the loan officer.

He tells the Loan Officer that he was going to India for some business for 2 weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.

The Loan Officer tells him that the bank will need
Some form of security for the loan.

So the Indian man hands over the keys and the documents of the new Ferrari car parked on the street in front of the bank.

The loan officer consults the president of the bank,
Produces all the required items and everything check out to be OK.

The loan officer agrees to accept the car as a security for the loan.

The bank president and the Loan Officer had a good laugh at the Indian
For keeping a $750,000 Ferrari as a security and taking only $5,000 has a loan.

An employee of the bank then drives the Ferrari
Into the banks underground garage and parks it there.

Two weeks later the Indian returns and pays $5000 and the interest which comes to it $15.41.

Seeing this, loan officer says,

“Sir, we are very happy to have your business
And this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled.
While you are away, we checked you out and
Found out that you were a multi millionaire.

What puzzled us was why would you bother to borrow $5000?”

The Indian replies
"Where else in the New York City can I park my car for 2 weeks and
For only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return".
This is a true incident and the
Indian is none other than... "VIJAY MALLYA"
Click to expand...

LOL, I read that joke like 8 or 9yrs ago..An i remembered it didnt mention Indian.. You sure it wasnt Chinese..Cos chinese are known to be stingy with their money... Anyways a Good joke..Anymore Indian jokes..
 
P

psy83

Alfrescian
Loyal
How do Chinese parents name their kids?

The parents take a couple of dishes with them and head upstairs. They reach the top of the stairs and throw the dishes downstairs.

"CHING!!! CHONG!!!"
 
P

psy83

Alfrescian
Loyal
A Chinese man arranged for a hooker to come to his room for the evening. Once in the room they undressed, climbed into bed, and went at it. When finished, the Chinese man jumped up, ran over to the window, took a deep breath, dove under the bed, climbed out the other side, jumped back into bed with the hooker and commenced a repeat performance.

The hooker was impressed with the gusto of the second encounter. When finished, the Chinese man jumped up, ran over to the window, took a deep breath, dove under the bed, climbed out the other side, jumped back into bed with the hooker and started again!

The hooker was amazed at this sequence. During the fifth encounter, she decided to try it herself. When they were done she jumped up, went to the window and took a deep breath of fresh air, dove under the bed to find 4 other Chinese men.
 
scbccb

scbccb

Alfrescian
Loyal
Namaste here are the world champions in dish throwing. :biggrin:

[video=youtube;TrL79uwTDAk]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TrL79uwTDAk[/video]

psy83 said:
How do Chinese parents name their kids?

The parents take a couple of dishes with them and head upstairs. They reach the top of the stairs and throw the dishes downstairs.

"CHING!!! CHONG!!!"
Click to expand...
 
P

psy83

Alfrescian
Loyal
[video=youtube;3gAU2ex2LvM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3gAU2ex2LvM&feature=related[/video]
 
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